hi! i wrote a fic called i'll tell you how the sun rose / a ribbon at a time for targarrus for the drink with me exchange 2025, and i had A Plan, and wanted to write about it, so here are my thoughts and some things i wanted to highlight about the work :)
i find writing jehan really difficult. the only other time i've written them is for a way-too-long-semi-crack-fic that i published way too late for the collection it was for due to #health issues. they were Very Differently Depicted in that, and being able to write a properly serious work, especially alongside grantaire, was a really fun challenge! thank you targarrus for asking for them!
i wanted to parallel the two of them in a piece because i think we have very easily parallelled characters in les mis (javert & valjean, cosette & eponine, grantaire & enjolras, etc.) and these two can be parallelled but often aren't, and i thought it was interesting since i imagine they face pretty similar challenges and fears. it's how they cope with these that displays how different they are to the audience.
i made the choice to switch their perspectives so the readers never fully get an idea of what each of them is feeling. there is no complete clarity that jehan thinks this and grantaire is afraid of that, because i think muddying the perception makes them both more parallel-able. if that makes sense.
it's not a central part of their narratives either, but i have written, in both iterations, the two of them as queer. jehan doesn't have the terminology to describe it in the 1830s, but is uncomfortable with gendered terminology, and grantaire, in some way, knows but doesn't like reflecting on it. i did have a brief part where i started writing their semi-both-coming-out in the 1830s version, but didn't finish it because i didn't want to parallel that in the 2020s. just know, they probably chatted about it at some point.
sunrises are pretty important for les mis (darkest nights ending, suns rising, you get me) and it felt kind of cool to use the arc (literally) of a day in the sun to capture the different stages of a friendship. the morning is when they meet, and there's all this possibility; midday is when they're getting to know each other better, and maybe some difficulties in their friendship arise; afternoon is their argument, where how they manage their feelings is amplified outwards; and evening is how they reflect on that.
they inspire each other, wheeeee! that's pretty much it. both struggle with inspiration, and then the other person is there, in a visually complex way: in the 1830s, grantaire is not well, healthy, or sober, really, but jehan finds inspiration in that; in the 2020s, jehan is tired and probably stressed, and not at all 'put-together' for guests, and grantaire finds something inspiring about that. they both want the other person to like the work they've done, and they both feel a connection to each other.
food is a great unifier. by having them eat in both scenarious, it's connecting them together, and through time.
some fun notes i had in my head for this chapter:
hucheloup is in the first scene at the corinthe :) i love her
1830s grantaire knew les amis before jehan but wasn't at the meeting the night before. you can imagine a reason why.
2020s grantaire did not. jehan's the link. 2020s grantaire is also on his second degree here, having finished a bachelor in classics and is working on his second in fine art. his father is not happy about this.
1830s jehan forgets to eat when in the groove and so didn't eat much at the meeting. hence why two breakfasts were needed.
2020s jehan spent most of the party growing more and more drunk and stressing about their lack of creativity.
these sections were the most difficult to write. i knew where i wanted the story arc to go, but this is sort of the filler, or the character-connection.
both are properly inspired here, and you can tell by the end that other other person is helping with their creativity, even if they're not entirely happy with the end of the scene. in 1830s, jehan's smiling, and grantaire finds a need to capture that; in 2020s, grantaire's advising jehan on finding their confidence, and jehan wants that to continue.
throught this fic, the two are primarily paralled by their reflections on failure. in the 1830s, jehan's full of hope and ardent belief in people, but they still fear failing, especially because, in this instance, it would mean death. in the 1830s, grantaire is actively failing, his lessons, his familial relationships (are they healthy? who knows), and instead of fighting it, he leans into it. in the 2020s, jehan has an undercurrent of not wanting to fail, of needing the work to be enough, because otherwise, what are they doing? whereas grantaire's in that opposite position, he has failed, and now that it doesn't mean death, he's okay with failing. he just doesn't want to fail other people, and jehan is one of the people he worries about failing.
which means in this section, you get to see how much they value one another. 1830s grantaire thinks jehan is this talented, creative person, and he wants to continue engaging with them. 2020s jehan views grantaire as someone wise and intelligent, and they want him to continue engaging with them! the two have a need and a want for continued connection, even as their relationship appears less streamlined than you would think.
fun facts about this chapter in my head:
2020s grantaire's oil paints were expensive. he knows people shouldn't really use them for signs. he also doesn't care; he values the people in his life more than the items, and jehan needed paints.
1830s jehan knows grantaire isn't entirely doing alright, and their hope is that by engaging more with their friends, grantaire will find stability. they are wrong, because grantaire has made his own choice, but they want him to connect with others through his work, not just see them as they are and feel that disconnect. it's from their belief in the goodness of others.
the paint names are because i've found some paints sound nothing like the colour they are. friday night tango should be red, and los angeles lipstick should be a vibrant pink, but they aren't.
there is an overlooming presence of the law in both sections: grantaire recognises it as an authority and, while he personally resents it, understands the fact that it will impact his personal relationships; jehan does not recognise the right for the police to impact their personal relationships. there's also that difference in the way they view the world: grantaire sees the police as a volatile force to avoid, jehan sees them as a force to fight.
they're fighting! it was really, really tough to figure out how to make them fight, mainly because i don't think they would, at least not often. i think jehan would recognise the way grantaire tried to self-sabotage his relationships and would actively avoid causing arguments. they choose in the scene before to entirely stop talking about Enjolras because they know grantaire will have an adverse reaction to it.
the 1830s version was easier to write because grantaire self-sabotages, he does that, we know he does, and jehan has this panicked realisation in the middle that if grantaire is right, it’s their life. they die, and they have to make themself believe it’s worth it. their reaction is primarily an anxiety or a panic attack.
the 2020s version of jehan is exhausted and working hard because this has to work. they care so much and they have to be enough. they’ve been working so hard, for so long, that when they break, it’s because they have to convince themselves that it will work, and the ends justify the means.
grantaire recognises his own failure both times. in the 1830s, it’s shame and embarrassment and the recognition this impacts more than enjolras that sets him off; in the 2020s it’s seeing how his failure to rally the bridge club has impacted a very hardworking jehan, and how easy they will give up themself for the cause, that drives a panic attack.
both have panic attacks or anxiety attacks, but i've kept it vague because they’re not a ubiquitous sensation.
fun facts about this chapter:
a lot of my thoughts on grantaire surround the idea that he was in paris and active in politics for the july revolution. he became disillusioned after that, I wonder why, and so his fears in this are tied a bit to that.
a lot of my thoughts on jehan surround the idea that they aren’t naïve, but wilfully trying to avoid the negatives. they don’t want to conceptualise what could go wrong, because then they aren’t working towards the positives, they’re avoiding the negatives.
neither are doing well creatively during this time, i wonder why (they inspire each other ☹)
i chose bridge club because a friend of mine was part of a bridge society at uni, and dominoes is less popular. i have considered what other amis might have done during this time.
they’re grieving. grantaire's grieving jehan’s life, jehan’s grieving their idea of grantaire’s recovery. both feel responsible for not recognising their part in the breakdown of their relationship.
and in both iterations, they want to use their artistic skills to add to the other. grantaire wants to show how jehan was to whoever finds their notebook, jehan wants to write about how much they value grantaire, and yet neither find themselves enough.
fun facts about this chapter:
hucheloup is technically in this chapter again, because i love her.
i tried for a more poetic end. do they recall their last life? maybe. do they grieve? possibly. but they’ve put their artistic tools between them, as an indicator that they share their craft with one another, and they have time now, to handle their feelings.
there are probably other things that i put in, because i love a parallel that transcends time, but here we go. my thoughts on my fic 😊
vaporwave
theartofmadeline
yousharknotpass
izzy806
blakekathryn
jbbartram-illu
turnnoffyourmind
germansingergirl
areudirty
jacobvanloon
