cut by the dozen @fracturedsunsets - Tumblr Blog

hellooo!!

just wanted to say i’m new to tumblr, and would love to be friends with you guys in the marauders fandom. have been a fan in 2015, and recently joined back into the fandom and i’m so shocked at how tight knit everyone is !!

please don’t be shy and dm if you’d like to be friends :)

i go by R, but we’ll see if I have the guts to write out my real name in the future lol

#regulus black #marauders #james potter #sirius black #jegulus #marauders era #evan rosier #barty crouch jr #remus lupin #the marauders #the marauders era #wolfstar #rosekiller

Finding Comfort, Losing It: My Journey with Fandom Burnout in the Marauders Fandom

I wanted to share my experience with fandom burnout in case anyone else has felt something similar but didn’t know what to make of it.

Like many in the fandom, I crave comfort like oxygen. Feeding off these storylines, characters, headcanons, and fanfics for a long time gave me that sense of comfort. This space was my escape, and I got high off of it. Living through stories that were so carefully crafted and presented was essential for me. But now, I feel none of that. No longer exciting, heartwarming, or soothing, but rather disconnecting, distasteful, and hurtful. The way I could describe it is that it feels like I’m grieving. It sounds dramatic; trust me, I know. But why or what went wrong? I could name a few reasons.

I got into the Marauders fandom when it started booming on Tumblr in 2015. It was exactly what I pictured it to be—wholesome, creative, and fun. I loved it. Coming back now, a lot has changed, but the sense of belonging is still there. There is something indescribable about making up stories, ships, and headcanons about characters that we continue to deepen our understanding of, and we can all relate to it.

Most of all, though, I felt connected and understood. Sure, we all shared a silly passion, but it felt like this fandom gave me an outlet—access to be myself and to feel loved and understood through it. It sounds personal because it was. I took it personally.

The moment that did it for me was when I read a triggering fanfic that was enjoyable initially, but eventually, I felt the need to put it down. In any other circumstance, I would’ve. But there is something to be said about being in a fandom that makes me feel “obligated” to finish it. I’m “obligated” to keep up with the latest fanfics, continuously pump out content, and keep up. Mostly, it’s about keeping up. So I didn’t put it down— I finished it and regret it heavily.

Now, I’m left with so much dread and frustration that it got to the point where I’m hurt. The past few weeks, I had to reconcile with this new beginning—the fact that my relationship with this fandom is now tainted by this one horrible experience. As a result, I lost much joy, bringing forth a wave of sadness every time I was reminded of this fandom.

I’m not blaming the fanfic author or the fandom in any way for the fact that I crossed my boundaries. But how this fandom is and how we interact with it is very enlightening. People take things very personally here (even though we’re arguing about dead gay fictional characters, come on), and it’s because this fandom is personal to us. We love this place. A bit too much. To the point where we’re incredibly defensive and argumentative. And frankly, I don’t want to be a part of this space if that’s all it is. I like the breeze, the chill, the ease I initially felt—none of the rest.

I’m still navigating this journey. I know I need a break from this fandom. I know I’m still grieving the fandom I used to find so much solace in that now feels like a sharp, dull pain. I know I shouldn’t have poured my personal feelings into this space because look where that left me — hurt.

If there’s anything to take away from this — let this be your reminder to listen to yourself. Give yourself grace. There is no need to be obligated to any aspect of the fandom. Do you. And most of all, don’t take it personally. It’s not worth it. You can still love these characters and stories, set firm boundaries, and choose how you interact with this fandom. This is supposed to be a safe space, and while it may not feel like that in its entirety, you can make it safe for yourself.