Hello! I just realized that I've never made a proper introduction.
My name is Froggie and this is me, or at least how I'll be drawing myself.(The design could change in the future but this one will be it for a while at least)
On this account I post art and reblog shit I think is funny/ important.
That art includes OCs (especially for DND) and fanart
I also write fanfiction that I illistrate and post the drawings for on here.
I have many little guys running around in my brain matter that I hope to share soon. I want to make graphic novels. Many stories come with many guys.
Some things I enjoy are art (that's obvious by now lol), theater, cosplay (I don't do it often because that shit costs money, but I like it on occasion, and being silly.
Now that I have a "face" to show. I might start making comics of the funny shit that happens to me sometimes. Maybe even a few comics of the less funny shit that happens to me sometimes. Who knows. I'm not making promises but it's a thought.
Some of the media I'm in to (keep in mind this is like always changing) is mystreet, word girl, rise of the TMNT, Ninjago, owl house, digital circus, fnaf, and so so much more.
Thank you for letting me yap. Hope you enjoy my art (when I remember to post it)
a character who truly, legitimately goes “but why does that matter?” about their feelings when someone who cares about them asks. and the sudden falling of everyone around them’s faces as they realize that this person doesn’t recognize themself as someone who needs or should be taken care of. i want Everyone to hurt. surprise at the idea, worry for them, horror at not having noticed. do you see this person who doesn’t think of themselves as a person?
Spoilers for Mermaid Tales: The Black Lullaby ep 13!!!!!
I had been wanting Zane to turn human sense the realm breaker was first shown. So of course I had to draw it. Also him canonically looking like a woman? SAY LESS!!!!!!!!!!!
I've been looking at old phynix drop high episodes to see what the layout of the house is just for this drawing and the one I did for chapter 8. I think my earlier drawings that showed Zane's room were a bit inaccurate because those were going off of vague memory, but it's fiiiiiinneeeee.
If you're new here, this is for my Mystreet fanfiction (Behind The Mask by Froggie11)
May is Ehlers-Danlos syndrome Awareness month and so I wanted to make a post talking about my experiences in honor of the month. I originally wanted to post this on the first of May but was busy with finals. But I'm making it now.
So yes, I have Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (EDS). If you don't already know, EDS is a connective tissue disorder. There are many different types of EDS that affect people differently but I'll only be talking about hypermobile eds. That's the kind I have and while I do feel that all types and experiences are important to talk about, I want to allow people who actually have those experiences to voice them themselves.
How I got diagnosed
Eds is something you are born with, but it can lay dormant, usually in that case appearing more prominent after puberty. Which is what happened to me.
It wasn't completely dormant, there were some signs when I was younger. Part of hypermobile eds is, well, being hypermobile. When I was a child I would often twist my arms in weird directions to freak people out. I vaguely recall how in the 3rd grade I would almost exclusively do my work standing up and having my foot resting on my shoulder. The teacher let me do this because I was more productive that way. Additionally I did have my arms dislocated a few times as a child and I bruised and scared easily. All signs of hypermobile eds. What I DIDN'T have yet was the chronic pain.
That was until around 7th grade. During 7th grade I began to get a lot of constant back, neck, and shoulder pain. However, this was never addressed too much because I was dealing with poor mental health at the time and so a lot of my physical symptoms were blamed in that, and in all fairness a portion of the tension in my shoulders probably WAS from the stress, but there was another contributor that we didn't know about yet.
That year I woke up on Christmas day not being able to move my neck and in extreme pain to the point of tears. Did I go to a doctor? No. I used a hot pack everyday until I could move my neck again. I spent two weeks not being able to move my neck. I did not see that as a red flag.
After that the pain continued. I blamed it on everything but a possible disability. In my defense I didn't even hear about eds at that point but I digress. During my freshman year of highschool I started to be chronically tired. I was always napping. I was always in pain. This was during COVID, so that was blamed on depression. But the symptoms didn't stop when school opened up. They didn't stop when I made a new group of friends. They didn't stop when I joined the dance team. They didn't stop. The tiredness became a more noticeable difference after the lockdown. When I was in 8th grade I would come home and immediately do all of my homework, but all throughout high school I would come home and sleep until dinner, then do my homework after dinner. That being said, I never questioned it. At that point I had gotten so used to feeling pain I had convinced myself that that is just what bodies felt like and I was being dramatic. "No one else needs to nap everyday. No one else complains about their neck. I need to just suck it up. If everyone else can handle it then so can I."
It continued on like that. Didn't get better but didn't get worse. I dislocated my hip a couple of times, but outside of that nothing surprised me. Then I went to college. The thing about eds is sometimes it goes up and down. Sometimes it can get better, and sometimes it can suddenly get worse. I don't know what caused it to get worse. I don't know if there was a cause.
At the end of my fall semester of my first year at collage my lower back was in extreme pain. I would wake myself up crying in pain and found it increasingly difficult to get up in the morning. I went to the doctor for an X-ray. They found a limbus vertebra (it's kinda hard to explain what that is so you might want to just Google images.) limbus vertebra are weird things that happen, but are not known to cause any pain, so I was told it was likely a muscle issue and was given steroids.
The steroids worked at lowering the pain for a bit. Then the pain came back. My back pain would frequently go up and down, but it was always there. Then the fall semester of this school year my pain level took a sudden spike up. (What is it about the fall semester lol?) I went to the doctor again because I thought it could be a kidney stone, so I was sent to get a C-T scan. The good news is my kidneys were fine and stone-less. The bad news is I had four bulging disks. The part about that that FINALLY raised questions from me was the fact I didn't have a fall, or an accident, or any kind of incident that could explain that. I basically got a back injury just from existing. (Loose tissue baby.)
I was in so much pain. Like I can't even describe it with words. To make things worse the art building's elevator was being fixed up so only stairs were available. I had a class on the top floor. I ended up having to do independent work for that class because I could not keep going up four flights of stairs every other day. My right leg began to get tingly and numb. My plan was to just continue on like normal and act like nothing was wrong, then while sitting outside of one of my classrooms, waiting for class to start, I realized I could not get back up. Every time I tried to stand the pain would shoot up my spine like lightning. Which led to two of my friends who were also in that class walking into the building and finding me having a panic attack. They had to physically help me stand and walk to my chair while other people watched. I should not have been embarrassed, but I was. I felt so fragile in that moment. I hated it. (Not my friends helping me, they are amazing for that, just that they had to.)
I ended up using a cane for several months after that and also started physical therapy. I stopped using a cane after those few months because my doctor said she doesn't recommend using a cane for back pain. Now I could actually argue that it was helping me walk because my LEG was going numb. But at that point that had gone down since I was in physical therapy so I decided that at the very least I didn't need it ANYMORE. At that same spoon where I was told to not use the cane I was also screened for Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, where I was diagnosed with hypermobile eds.
Eventually I got cleared from physical therapy. But I still am supposed to do my exercises to keep my body stable.
Believe it or not, my eds is considered to be mild. I don't use mobility aids. ( I know I just said I used a cane for a bit but technically that was due to an injury related to my eds not my eds directly.) But it still affects me daily.
What is it like living with EDS
Hypermobile
Hypermobile eds mainly affects the joints which causes flexibility. I can pull my shoulder so that it's behind my head and fold my elbow so that my palm is facing down douching my back. I can twist my arm ALMOST 360°. I can pull my thumb so that the top of it touches the bottom of that same arm. I can bend my knee so that the bottom of my foot is visible. I originally wanted to draw these things but I ran out of time and I'm not comfortable showing pictures of myself on here yet, so you are getting detailed descriptions. Describing poses is hard so idk if I accurately explained all of my little moves, but hopefully you get the idea. I'm freaky flexible. When I hold my arms straight out my elbows bend at an angle that makes my arms look broken.
But this comes with my joints also being easily dislocated. Earlier this year I dislocated my left arm in my sleep. Not a fun way to wake up. I eventually got it back in but I had to do my whole morning routine with one working arms before that.
Now I know I did say one flexible thing I can do with my legs, but overall my arms are significantly more mobile. My knees are actually tight and stiff most of the time and are far more likely to lock up. Usually this happens when the joint is actually more prone to dislocations, the muscles essentially work overtime to keep it in place, this creates tension. My knees are really hard. Like this year I accidentally hit a 2 by 4 plank of wood with my knee and it broke in half.
My fingers also frequently lock up and dislocate. It may or may not have happened as I was typing this post.
I've also dislocated my big toe a few times this week.
I do a lot of theater and, as I mentioned earlier my arms look broken when I hold them straight out. It does make doing the choreography extra difficult because even if I'm technically doing the right dance move it doesn't look quite right, so I have to modify my arm position so I look somewhat normal.
Skin
Now I don't have the stretchy skin that often comes with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, but my skin is a bit more fragile. I get cut and bruised easily. I have weird scars. And my skin is sensitive to weather changes, causing my hands to get cracked and bloody in the colder seasons.
Chronic Pain
This is a big one for me. I'm always in pain somewhere. Sometimes it's my neck and shoulders (like it is right now.) sometimes it's my lower back, sometimes it's my hips, sometimes it's my leg. But it's always there. My back and neck are the main problem areas for me. The pain varied too, especially the back pain. Sometimes I'm able to be productive and I'll barely feel it, other times I find it physically difficult to get out of bed from the pain, and may even cry.
My eds symptoms also get worse with my period. So not only do I have horrible period cramps, but then my spine will feel like it's full of needles.
I find that extensive physical activity does make it worse. Remember how I said I love theater? Yeah, so the dancing part of the theater is... Rough for me. I did the school musical at my university this year and that production involved long, late night rehearsals nearly everyday. I would often be in a lot of pain when I got home from rehearsal and had to lay on a hot pack before I could sleep. Some nights, when I wasn't needed on stage, I would just lay back stage, flat on my back. Even straight plays can add to the pain just with how long you need to be standing and walking. However, I still plan on participating in theater productions. I find everything about theater, from the friends I meet, to the connection with the audience, to feeling the harmonies echoing around me during big numbers as I too am involved in the singing, to the cheers in here when I bow, all so rewarding. Now unfortunately there seems to be a pattern of my eds getting worse as I age so this might change, but at this point I find that the pain I feel doing these physical activities is worth the reward I feel when acting or singing. If this does end up changing, I hope that it is not anytime soon.
I also struggle sitting up for too long at a time without back pain. Which is kinda not ideal for being an artist and a writer. So often times of the pain gets to bad will go in my bed to draw and write instead. Even then it still hurts my shoulders and fingers but if I'm not creating something at all times I think I'll go insane. So technically my fanfictions and artworks cause me physical pain to make. That too is worth it. (As you can see I'm a very stubborn person and I'm not willing to give up my interests just because my body hates me)
Chronic fatigue
I briefly mentioned that my muscles have to work extra hard to keep my Lego ass joints together. This not only causes tension in certain areas, but it causes me to be tired literally 24/7. I swear I'll accomplish one task and feel the need to sleep for a year. Which on top of doing school and theater, makes it extremely difficult to get a job. The advantage of school is my classes are spread apart and so I'll often find spots to nap around campus in between classes (I live at home so I don't have a dorm to sleep at.) but you can't exactly get away with that at a job. I want to work but I literally spend all my free time sleeping because of how low energy I get, so I don't even know if I would handle one very well, so I haven't applied to one. Maybe when I finish school because I just don't think I'll be able to handle both school and work, even though most of my peers can, which kind of sucks.
As of late it's been extra bad so I think there might be a little bit of burn out contributing. That and I'm also an iron and victim D deficient girly so that probably doesn't help.
The fatigue too gets worse on my period.
Digestive issues
I deal with heartburn. I also sometimes feel nauseous for no reason and will not even get sick. Which is super fun because I also have emetophobia.
I also have IBS. For your sake that is all the information about that that you are getting.
Dysautonomia
Okay so from what I remember when I researched it, dysautonomia is basically a fancy word for heart rhythm issues. But I could be slightly wrong on that or oversimplified, so I do encourage you to Google it for yourself after you finish reading this.
One of the issues listed under dysautonomia, however, was POTs. Which I have.
Now my pots are actually minor. I have not fainted. But I have felt dizzy. I get frequent heart palpations, sometimes to the point where I can physically feel my heartbeat from beneath my skin. It's kinda a weird feeling. I think the highest my heart rate got was 135 BPM but to be fair, that was after drinking coffee. I will randomly get dizzy and out of breath. If I stand up too fast after sitting for too long my head feels heavy and my vision gets staticy. One time my vision actually fully turned black, but I still somehow stayed awake. Yipee. This is another thing that gets worse on my period.
Guys we gotta love the monthly blood bath.
And sometimes I get brain fog, and the best way I can describe that is my thoughts are slower and don't always make sense, and everything seems confusing even when it shouldn't.
Conclusion
If you want to know more about eds, check out The Ehlers Danlos Social. I'll drop the link below, but you should be able to find it with a Google search if you don't want to trust the link (fair and valid.)
They offer a bunch of information about all types of Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, including how to get diagnosed if you suspect you may have it as well. Feel free to share your experiences in the comments or in reblogs of this post. I think it's important to talk about and I want everyone to feel safe and seen.
Okay well, in sweet irony, my long ass post about Ehlers Danlos had caused my arms, fingers, and neck to hurt. Because I have Ehlers Danlos. So I'm going to lay on a hot pack and read fanfiction. Have a good night. And if you made it this far, thank you for taking the time to read this. That means a lot.
This is the only right listing and anyone who disagrees is wrong.
(just know I don't know if someone created the og image or not. I got it off of Google images so I think it's just a random stock image but if anyone does know the origins tell me so I can give proper credit)
I'm sorry to let you know that 100,000,001 (one hundred million and one) is divisible by 17 and because of that, so is every 16-digit number that is four digits repeated four times e.g. 1234123412341234
Make it stop make it stop. * Hugs my number 14 as I rock back and forth in the padded room* you could never hurt me like this. Y-your perfect. There there. We are safe now
the thing about being "good with kids" is all it takes is literally just not trying to control and mould them with every interaction. it's just being a normal person and engaging with them through normal interactions like having conversations and playing games. it's just being genuine and friendly and not perceiving them as lumps of wet clay you are there to shape. "oh you're so good with kids" thanks it's because I think they are people
Please keep interacting with this post because when I come to tumblr to procrastinate, this shows up again in my notifications and guilts me into writing again
#they really said “you can’t use wiki as an academic source-use our garbage AI that’s even less reliable”#and you can’t even opt out of it
no but you can FORCE it away. use ublock origin and copy paste the blacklist i made into the filters to be able to remove the bullshit AI overview that google forces. it also removes youtube's forced ads (at least until they fix it)
you can also use the ublacklist extension and use this blacklist of AI image generation websites to curate your google image results
there are ALWAYS ways around stuff. it's just a matter of looking into it and asking around
Also: bookmark Wikipedia and if you already know that it's the wiki that you want, go DIRECTLY to Wikipedia and use the search bar there.
Every time you Google anything, they get data that they can sell, their advertisers get exposure that they pay for and their datacenters use a fuckload of energy. Bookmark Wikipedia.
i feel like people aren't getting how dire ai is. we are running out of drinkable water. our brains aren't engaging as much with what we see and hear. people near data centers don't get clean water and experience electricity blackouts. it's being used to make pornography of underaged people and women. it often just lies. it affirms everything. it lies. it has made people kill themselves. it lies for gods sake. and people act as if im dramatic for being staunchly against it. 'now i KNOOW you hate ai and whatever, but look at this cute video' this isn't me being a new age puritan about internet videos, this is about the fucking earth and our future living on this planet. people are suffering now, people will suffer more, and my friends and parents will roll their eyes and think im annoying for despising ai so explicitly. we need to wake up because we cannot live like this
Her gimmick is meant to represent the struggles of undiagnosed autism. She's a moth because they are ALMOST like butterflies, but there are differences. People can tell there is SOMETHING different about her. Moths are also often seen as lesser than butterflies by many people and she has often been treated like she was bad or wrong by people before she joined the circus.
Bugs are also fragile and she often feels fragile and has been infantilised, the same reason I made her extra cutsie. (The fragility of her body also represents chronic illness but that's kinda a side thing for her story.)
Cain consistently calls her a butterfly even though she is obviously a moth to everyone else. Both to have the funny implication that Cain doesn't know what a moth is but knows what a butterfly is, but also because an ai wouldn't be able to tell a masking autistic person and an allistic person apart I think.
I have more I want to say about her, but I kinda want to spread it across posts. So ask me questions so I can talk more about her plz!!!!!
(also yes, she is designed to look like a silk moth, hence her name)
I used to think the hard part of reading Chinese would be learning the characters. Which yes. Is hard. Very hard, actually, because sometimes you think you know them but then you realize you actually just know the unit you’re currently studying so you haven’t mastered the word so much as you’ve got “well, this section is about ordering in a restaurant and I recognize I’m supposed to be talking about a drink, and in this module I’ve only learned four drinks so let’s process this out,” which works well until you leave your language learning app and trying applying anything anywhere. So yeah, that’s hard.
BUT we don’t give enough credit to the real nut punch of a learning obstacle—no spaces between words. When I’m listening to another language, it all sounds like on continuous stream of sounds, sure, but usually when you look at it on paper you can at least understand the basic shape of the language unit. Like even if I don’t understand, for example, “Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet,” I at least can grasp where each word I don’t understand begins and ends. Chinese, meanwhile, is like “loremipsumdolorsitamet” and when you look up how you’re supposed to even know how to approach it, there’s very useful advice yes but it all sorta sounds like “at some point. you will simply get it.” Well, I’m not at that point yet. whatthefuckareanyofthesesentencessaying
So, I wanna be clear: I use this page to platform fundraisers specifically for people and causes of Black African descent. We often don't even consider that Black people exist across the globe, and have to deal with the same suffering and political conflicts in tandem with pre-existing antiblackness. Sudan, Congo, Haiti, Cuba, Palestine, etc. I want to use my position to amplify their voices, to give them the spotlight and space to be seen in a world that often neglects their existence.
That being said!
My peers (of all backgrounds) and I have been sharing fundraisers for Gaza for at least three years. And I recognize that that's a while, but folks being tired of hearing about it doesn't prevent suffering from occurring. It doesn't stop people from experiencing horrors under genocide. So often I get asked on my personal page, why no one is listening or helping, and I don't have anything to tell them. I don't know what to say anymore.
Because I see what they're saying, I do see how it feels like my peers and I are basically circling fundraisers between ourselves at this point. I see how the world treats them, and I don't know what more I could possibly say to convince people to care, after everything we've witnessed. What could I possibly say, if that's not enough?
We could use your help. But much more importantly, the people of Gaza could use your help! Even if you can't donate, reblog a campaign post shared by your peers every now and then. Pick one family's campaign and commit to sharing that one, if nothing else. Anything is better than nothing. Everybody on here claims to have some sort of marginalization and struggle that they wish to be witnessed and acknowledged, so I know you understand and empathize.