i hope this hurts

[frstcorinthians]

half gods are worshiped in wine and flowers.

★ aleks, 26, she/her. ★ everything is tagged. ★ ao3 is here

real gods require blood.

[nociceptrix]

me when I become the killer

[energyprison]

every political scandal has to be called ____gate now because 54 years ago a guy named blowjob told reporters there were bugs in the democrat offices

[enba-and-luka]

[lakevida]

defunctland episode released immediately upon your death chronicling all failed career paths and relationships and somehow michael eisner is still at fault

[blemgoid]

robbing the pharaos tomb but hes the broke pharaoh and theyres nothing to steal

[blemgoid]

and the picture of him on the sarcophagus he's turning his pockets out and shrugging

[klapollo]

you are not a "femcel" you are not a "foid" you are not a "hon" you are a woman worthy of respect and taking up space and being happy and the world is yours for the taking you're ALIVE!!!!!!!!! you're a HUMAN!!!!!!! FUCK what they told you!!!!!!

[certainly-april]

Ragebaiting my fat dog? More like master baiting my fat hog!!!!!!!!

[grimoiremanifest]

❗️Great Hog is displeased by this.

The kingly pig looks taken aback by this statement. "You claim to be 'baiting' our kind?.. A master of it, no less - after all the trust we hsve placed in you?"

- Your relationship with the Hog Society 🐖 is now Unfavourable.

[certainly-april]

[hypersensationalism]

THE WAY SO MANY PEOPLE KEEP USING THIS PICTURE FROM THE MUPPET MOVIE WHERE YOU CAN LITERALLY SEE KERMIT

[cliffsecord]

[pmamtraveller]

"Cats on a Plane" by artist Kelly Pringle.

[goddisposez]

hold up why is the beatles’ music actually fire

[goddisposez]

how did they get the words to crawl up the screen like that

[angelbabymikaa]

do you think there’s dry humping in heaven

[everyday-cutephoto]

[whatcoloristhatcat]

black mackerel tabby with high white spotting

[louceph]

smirking bastard with grievous grin

[cpericardium]

at the euthanasia party everyone gets a sip of the forbidden lean

[tastyrepulsorboots]

Yeah, same

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[araceil]

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

[collectorspose]

2000 fetcher the dog

[alphacrone]

writers and artists everywhere all the time