primary school pe teacher: come on you can try harder than thatâŠ.Â
me: does a gay little run that pisses them off

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@gaywhiteboy
primary school pe teacher: come on you can try harder than thatâŠ.Â
me: does a gay little run that pisses them off
Britney Spears Oops!âŠI Did It Again (2000)
This continues to be the single greatest piece of staged dialogue ever created
Polychromos and acrylic on paper (30 cm x 42 cm)
OPEN RP
Would you care for a free lollipop?
Would I?!
Would you?
Would I!?
Would you?!
WÌŽÌÌ ÍÍÍÍÌÌḬ̀̚ÍÌÌ€Í oÌŽÍÍÌÌÌÍÌłÍ ÍÍÌšḬ́ÍÍÌąuÌžÌżÍÌÌÌÍÌÌÌŠÌ©Ì ÌąÌlÌ·ÌÌÌÍÍÌÍÍÌÍÌÌÌÌ„ÍÌ ÌłÌŻÌšÌÌčÍdÌ·ÍÌÌÍÍÍÌÌÌœÌÌÌÍÍÌČÍÌš Ì”ÍÍÍÌÍ ÌÌŸÍÌŸÌÌ ÍÍÌżḬ́Í̻̻ÌÌÌÌłÌ§Ì€Ì§IÌ”ÍÌÍÌÍÌÍÍ ÍÌÍÌÍÌÌÌŻÌŻÍÌÌąÌ ÌŹÌš!̶ÌÌÌÍÌÍÌÌÌÍ̧ÍÌ„ÌąÌĄÌźÌ±?ÌžÌÌŸÍÌÌ̧̩Ì̫̰ÌÌ«ÍÍÌŠ
WÍĄÍÍÌ€ÌŹÌŒÍ ÍÍÍÌźÍÌČÍÌÌčOÍÍąÍÍÌÌÌÍÌ€ÌčÌÍÍÌŹÍÍÌ„UÌĄÍĄÌ¶ÌČÌ©ÌșÌÍÌÌÌźÌČLÍÍÌÍÌșÌČÌșÌ©ÍÌČÌÌ ÌÌșÍÍÍ ÌŻÌÌșDÍ̧ÍÍÌÍÍ̄̀ ÍÍ ÌąÌąÍÌŁÌÍ̱ÍYÌÍĄÍ̱̫ÍÌČÌČÌ»ÍÍÌ€ÌŠÌ ÌOÌ·ÍÍÍÍÌŒÌźÌ„ÌÍÍÌÌÌÍÌÌŠÌŒUÍÌĄÍÍÒÌ̱̌ÌÌ?ÍÍÍ Ì«ÍÌčÌ€ÌÍÍÌÌÌÍÌ!Í ÍÌ©ÌÍÌŻÌÌÍÌŠÌ̱ÌÍÌÍÍ
âŠ.would I what?
Would you care for a free lollipop?
Would I?!
RADDA RADDA
Yes. I would. Thank you.
I havenât seen the episode where this is from, but I have no doubt in my mind it went exactly like that.
Gays will respond âhahaâ and nothing else and decide itâs your turn in the conversation to say something
nakedsasquatch itâs ya man
Okay but seriously folks - as often as I joke about this movie stirs my loins and as weirdly popular as this text post got a while back, I wanna rap with you all about why the George of the Jungle remake is a pretty important piece of cinema.
Itâs literally the only movie I can think of that is based completely around the unheard of âFEMALE gaze.â Granted, while Iâm a huge movie buff Iâve not seen every movie ever made. But even so, even if thereâs another example of the âfemale gazeâ in cinema that has escaped me itâs still damn impressive that a kids movie from 1997 based on a Jay Ward cartoon from the 60âs managed to turn gender representation in media on itâs fucking ass!
First things first, letâs look at our leading lady and love interest - Ursula, played by Leslie Mann.
Let me just say that while Leslie Mann is adorable and a talented actress, she does look a little less conventional and a little more plain compared to the bombshells that Hollywood likes to churn out. Leslie, in comparison, looks much more like a real women youâd meet on the street. She dresses pretty conservatively and plain throughout the film ; Wearing outfits that are more functional than fashionable for trekking through the jungle, pulling her hair back and so forth. Not that if she was dolled up and more scantily clad it would give her character any less integrity, but can we appreciate how RARE that is in the male dominated industry of film? Just think about all the roads a film about a woman in the jungle COULD have taken but didnât - no scenes with her clothes strategically ripped or anything! You can say this is a kids movie, intended for children and thatâs why the sensuality of the female lead is so downplayed but there are PLENTY of kids movies that handle women in a very objectifying and sexualized manner despite the target audience is pre-pubescent. Like, a disgusting amount. So I donât think âitâs a kids movieâ is why the film doesnât take ANY, let alone EVERY, opportunity to showcase the main female characterâs sex appealâŠ
âŠespecially considering the sex appeal of the film rests squarely on the well defined shoulders of our male lead, George of the Jungle played by Brendan Fraser in the best god damn shape of his life!
*Homer Simpson Drooling Noises*
Whenever members of the reddit community try to compare the sexualization of women in fiction to the design of characters such as Batman and Superman, I always want to just sit them down and show them this movie. Because THIS is what the female sexual fantasy looks like, and Batman and Superman are male power-fantasies. Look at him - his big blue eyes, his soft hair, his lean, chiseled physique built for dexterity rather than power. Heâs wild and free, but gentle. Itâs like he fell right out of that steamy romance novel your mom tried to hide from you growing up.
Hell, the whole plot seems to be designed around how damn hot he is! First, for the majority of the film, he wears only a small strip of cloth to cover the dick balls and ass. Everything else is FAIR GAME to drool over for 40 minutes. Then, after he meets Ursula she takes him with her to San Francisco just so we can enjoy him in a well-tailored suit (as seen in the gif set), running around in an open and billowy shirt along side horses while Ursula and all of her friends literally crowd around and make sexual comments about him, and my personal favorite, ditch the loincloth entirely and have him walk around naked while covering his man-bits with various objects while one of Ursulaâs very lucky friends oogles him and makes a joke along the lines of âSo THATâS why they call him the âKING of the JungleââŠâ
And yes, itâs also a very cute and funny little movie. Out of all the movies based on Jay Ward cartoons, it was the most faithful to the fast-paced humor and wit of the original source material (yes even the new Peabody and Sherman movie which honestly I thought was too cutesy-poo.) But thatâs not why this movie is popular with the gay community or why we all became women in 1997. Itâs just really cool that thereâs a film out there where the sensuality of the female form takes a back seat for the oiled up, chiseled, physique of Brendan Fraser (in his prime that is)
One thing to add: in the scene mentioned above where the ladies are watching him in the billowy shirt running with the horses, it pans back to about 50 feet away to two guys in suits at this party looking at the women and one of the guys says, âMan, what is it with women and horses?â So not only does this movie highlight the female gaze, but it blatantly points out that western male sensibilities donât have a clue what actually appeals to women.
ALSO
heâs non threatening
as mentioned above, he looks built for dexterity rather than power, but heâs still a 6+ foot tall extremely muscular man, and not once are you worried for Ursula when heâs with her
ALSO
letâs take a look at his rival - Lyle is a cravat-wearing trust-fund kid (who, interestingly, is into Ursulaâs fortune more than her, which kind of makes this a gender-swapped gold-digger thing too). Heâs blonde and Ursulaâs mom LOVES him. Heâs more uncomfortable and less prepared to cope with the jungle than Ursula is, in his pastels and shiny shoes.
But he talks over Ursula, insists he knows whatâs best for her, ignores her autonomy. In spite of the fact that Lyle Van de Groot is a rich, educated, social climber who cares deeply about his clothing and appearances he is a point-by-point checklist of unhealthy masculinity in a way that beefy, inarticulate, uneducated George could never be. Ursula is off on her own doing her own thing and Lyle hires two FUCKING POACHERS to track her down in the middle of the jungle while sheâs working (or on vacation? Itâs never made clear because he interrupts her before she can explain why she went on the expedition). Lyle ignores the local guides, claiming his experience with a bridge in Maui means the bridge theyâre on is safe - which leads to a significant injury for one of the guides. He then tells Ursula the guides are conspiring against him, trying to make himself and his poachers seem safe and the Africans who make up the rest of their party seem dangerous.
Check that body language! A post above points out that weâre never worried about Ursula when sheâs around George. Thatâs because Lyle talks to her like this. Look at his aggressive lean! Look at him literally looking down at her! Sheâs tilted away from him in the least threatening position possible and heâs so aggressive about whatever point heâs making. When he finds her after he pushed her toward a damned lion he kisses her and she pushes him away. Want a textbook example of gaslighting? Here you go: she says âdonât get all smoochy with me! I remember what happened with that lionâ and he responds âWhat are you talking about? I was fighting that lion the whole time - you were just so terrified you donât remember.â Then he shoots George! And then he kidnaps Ursula and attempts to force her into marriage!
Now look at how George and Ursula interact (slightly NSFW):
Even though heâs a big strong dude and he thinks heâs doing whatâs okay he lets her set the tone for their interactions. He accepts that heâs out of his wheelhouse and even if he doesnât understand it he does what she says is culturally appropriate. He learns from her! He listens to her! Compare Lyle leaning into Ursula above to this image of George and Ursula talking:
Heâs listening to her, all of his attention is on on her, but heâs totally nonthreatening. His torso is turned toward her but heâs not invading her space, his hands are clasped, heâs smiling, and sheâs the one leaning into him. Look at that smile she has, look how happy she is to be listened to. Her posture in both images is vulnerable but in this one with George sheâs vulnerable because she has chosen to share with him instead of because she feels threatened.
When George rescues Ursula from Lyle at the end of the film it isnât a typical damsel situation - George doesnât have a knock-down-drag-out fight with Lyle, he swings into a tree and offers Ursula a hand so she can reach up and save herself (and before he does it he acknowledges how much itâs going to hurt and *whimpers* and looks human and scared). And youâve gotta remember that George rescues everybody. Itâs not just Ursula - he also rescues a parasailer and gets shot rescuing Shep and Ape. He just likes helping, dammit!
AND this movie offers a perfect counter to the ânice guyâ thing - Ursula starts engaged to a jerk who her mom thinks is a ânice guyâ the moves on to actual nice man George who isnât *just* nice - heâs also patient, listens to her, has his own skills and talents, is okay with being goofy, has his own social circle and isnât totally dependent on Ursula, and looks amazing. Ursula doesnât go with George just because heâs a *nice* guy who rescued her from an asshole, Ursula goes with George because heâs an interesting, fun person who is supportive of her different way of being an interesting, fun person. AND heâs emotionally available. Google image search George of the jungle and see how many smiles you can find, see how many open looks of confusion there are, see how much sadness you can see in Georgeâs face. Now look for images of Lyle. His two expressions are a smirk and cartoonish fear. I know this is a cartoonish kidâs movie, but it is SO powerful that the hero shares his emotions while the villain masks every emotion but fear. Lyle doesnât want to open up, he doesnât want to be vulnerable, he wants CONTROL. George wants to learn, to protect people he cares about, to explore new places, to laugh when heâs happy and to be sad when heâs sad, and that he does that while being a broad-shouldered, physically powerful dude who is NOT totally self-involved is justâŠ
Like, look, I didnât sign on to tumblr dot com for George of the Jungle discourse, but Iâm just now realizing that this movie may have done the most for destroying my conception of stoic masculinity and gender roles as a child.
Like
Damn.
i only have a body when i enter the grocery store
who the fuck is richard
that scene in the second Harry Potter where Harry has no bones in his arm is probably the most disgusting use of cgi
that wasnt cgi they literally removed daniel radcliffes bones for that scene
I hope he got them back
they didnt have the budget to put them back in so for the rest of the movies in the franchise they used cgi to make it look like they did
We never fucking learn.
just some of the the changes in design for the Penguin Symbol on old Penguin PaperbacksÂ
he did a little dance and for this crime he was imprisoned in a bubble
love every single word of this
*eyes the clock warily*
(Link)
how the fuck did the fire nation beat fucking anyone their element canât do shit to any of the others
shoot fire at an airbender? they blow fire back in your face now you got burn face
a waterbender sends a wave at you and you defend with fire? congrats dipshit now youâve turned that attack into steam in your eyes at best or boiling water on your skin at worst
you throw fire they throw rock you get hit with hot rock war over
Literally the only way the fire nation fought enemies was with slow technological veachiles (drills and air boats) and fucking AMBUSHING PEOPLE. AND IT WAS MAINLY AMBUSHING CIVILIANS (against the Geneva Convention). The fire nations army is full of war criminals
You think they have the Geneva Convention in ATLA? They donât even have Geneva.Â
this vine is one year old but everything about this is art. the camera rotates a full 180 degrees around a point. the child in the background misses an easy basketball shot then gets hit in the face in the face with a basketball. the fact that this kids name is semi. the fucking beat is three notes and semi kills that shit with one of the hottest bars dropped in this decade. âmoney add then multiplyâ means that semi knows his fuckin shit but he doesnt know how to say mathematics. put this fucking vine on a cd so it can be looped by aliens 3000 years in the future
you missed the kidâs genius - he can spell mathematics, he goes an extra step, itâs (M)oney (A)dd (Th)en (M)ultiply, I call that MATHM-Mathematics
this post never dies and you know what? i hope it never does. long live Semi the King.
I have tears in my eyes