REVIEWING THE (MANY) SPIDER-MAN FILMS: MASTER POST
hi guys I'm popping into existence because I just recently rewatched the original spiderman (tobey maguire) movies, then watched the reboot spiderman (andrew garfield) movies for the first time, then rewatched no way home. all within a week. and I have things to say!
knowledge of all of these movies is not necessary to understand this post, since I originally wrote this out on discord for a friend who hasn't seen any of the movies. there will, however, be spoilers!
I'm also not in this fandom so please forgive me if I say dumb things. now, let's get started...
first, before I dive in, I just want to explain where my head was at before this rewatch "project" took place.
when I was a kid, I used to watch the original trilogy OBSESSIVELY. it was a key part of my childhood and part of why I chose to start rewatching them.
I'd never seen the reboot duology, because I was told by many people that it was terrible, that andrew wasn't the real spiderman, etc etc. but recently I wanted to give those a chance too!
as for MCU spiderman, I haven't gotten into his movies outside of no way home, but I think he's alright! I just haven't been fully caught up with the MCU as a whole the past few years outside of some of their tv shows.
now, LET'S GET INTO IT FOR REALS!!!
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ORIGINAL TRILOGY - Maguire films
𒌐 MOVIE 1 𒌐
- 🕸️ Memory Lane: as a kid, I honestly used to be very meh towards this one, solely because the dvd case had spiderman kissing love interest mary jane on the back cover. yes, that was the only reason I was meh towards it, genuinely 😭 - 🕸️ Positives: I still liked the main villain, norman osborn aka the green goblin, because the guy's acting was really good!! I had mixed feelings towards harry, norman's son who is basically kind of an egotistical jerk, but after rewatching the latter two movies I liked him a little more (I will bring him up again). - 🕸️ Negatives: this movie was in 2002 so it's a bit silly. there's one line that did not age well but I won't be too woke about it. I also had pretty much zero interest in the romantic plot between spiderman/peter and mary jane. again I won't be too woke, but she really didn't have much of a role in the film other than enabling the "get the girl" trope to exist so it didn't feel like there was much reason to care outside of rooting for peter - 🕸️ Verdict: the movie is too iconic NOT to like, and the main villain gave it a really strong plot! I give it a 4/5. - 🕸️ Standout Scene(s): there's a scene where norman osborn is walking towards a mirror, and the evil version of himself (aka the green goblin) is talking to him in the mirror, and then the reflection changes to the regular him, and there's no editing at all, it's just the actor changing his demeanor to play virtually two different characters. very cool!
𒌐 MOVIE 2 𒌐
- 🕸️ Memory Lane: I think this one used to be my least favorite! it was definitely the one I rewatched the least. there's a scene where a piece of glass flies towards someone's eye in slow motion, and I think that's why I didn't like the movie, because for some reason anything remotely eye-related has always freaked me out. - 🕸️ Positives: this one is now my favorite though! the main villain, otto octavius, was very interesting to me in that he was a genuinely good guy before things went wrong. and even after things went wrong, he was going to do the right thing to keep people safe, but he ended up listening to evil instead…but still ultimately chose to do good in the end. idk I really like him now! the layers... I also enjoyed the other plots going on in the movie, particularly the internal tug of war with peter/spiderman not wanting to be the hero anymore. I love a hero who feels the weight of being a good guy and tries to give it up because the burden is too much, but ultimately pulls through anyway. harry's arc continues in this movie and I think it starts to get really interesting here too. harry is good friends with peter (I just KNOW people ship them), but he hates spiderman. of course, he doesn't know that peter is spiderman!! but nearing the climax of the movie he finds out, and I think the build up to that made the reveal very satisfying, and also made the end of the movie interesting because…what's he gonna do now??!!?!? - 🕸️ Negatives: not much, though mary jane was still a little boring! she had more development in the movie, but when she was in danger she was pretty much completely helpless :/ I know I know, I said I wouldn't be woke! - 🕸️ Verdict: almost perfect, definitely appreciate it more now than I did before. 4.8/5, I say. though I dislike using decimals. - 🕸️ Standout Scene(s): when peter's been struggling with hiding his identity the whole movie, keeping his lives separate, but after saving some people on the subway he accidentally loses his face-mask and when they see him they're just…kind. no one's like "omg spiderman is this guy we have to take pictures and post it online!!!1!!" or whatever, they're like, "…he's just a kid…." it's very heartwarming after everything he's been through for these people he saved to just be kind.
𒌐 MOVIE 3 𒌐
- 🕸️ Memory Lane: this one was my FAVORITE as a kid. I was obsessed with the main villain, the sandman, because he was this tough guy but at the core he literally only cared about his sick daughter back home. no I will not be psychoanalyzing my childhood obsession with this character :) - 🕸️ Positives: it was definitely interesting! harry's arc had a satisfying conclusion, and there were some silly moments. mary jane was also at her best, she had her own lore and problems going on and peter was notably oblivious to all of them, which led to her leaving him for a bit. and she wasn't as helpless when she got captured this time! they must've gotten some criticism and decided to do better this time around. anyway I said I wouldn't be woke- - 🕸️ Negatives: there was a LOT going on. which was apparently because the director was forced to include stuff he didn't want to include thanks to sony… too many plotlines, hard to lock in. - 🕸️ Verdict: I give it a meh. good overall, but had its weaker moments. maybe a 3.5/5. - 🕸️ Standout Scene(s): after peter got possessed by evil black goo he became emo.
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REBOOT DUOLOGY - Garfield films
𒌐 MOVIE 1 𒌐
- 🕸️ Memory Lane: none, never saw this movie til recently. - 🕸️ Positives: this movie gets a lot of flack for being a reboot, but it was really not that bad! it was darker (what was going ON in 2012 😭 people thought the early 2010s were miserable they had no idea what was coming…), darker and less campy(?) than the originals. the guy who played spider-man was pretty silly imo. and most importantly, there was…GWEN STACY. gwen, the romantic interest, was much MUCH more interesting than mary jane was in the original movies. gwen had spunk, she was smart and independent, and her chemistry with peter was honestly immaculate, the way they would make quips and stuff seemed so natural. I was rooting for them…despite already knowing what was going to happen to her in the second movie. now, at the end of movie 1, when her dad finds out "holy shit my daughter's boyfriend is spider man" and he ends up dying, his last words to peter are to tell him not to stay with gwen, to protect her by staying away from her...this foreshadowing had me primed and excited for the second movie (I am not a sadist guys I swear). - 🕸️ Negatives: the villain was BORING. the extra parker lore they added was BORING. honestly I feel like everything was boring EXCEPT for peter and gwen. also, andrew garfield, while his acting was alright for spiderman, I feel like the casting was still a little questionable??? that is a conventionally attractive man. peter parker is supposed to be a LOSER. this is a more surface level complaint though, mostly just thought the plot was boring to me. - 🕸️ Verdict: came for gwen, no regrets, ily gwen. 3/5 perhaps. maybe 3.5. - 🕸️ Standout Scene(s): besides the scenes with gwen in them, I like the scene where spiderman is going after this car-jacker guy in a parking lot and the guy pulls out a knife. dramatically, spiderman drops to his knees and goes, "my weakness! small knives!" before webbing the guy to the wall. that was funny.
𒌐 MOVIE 2 𒌐
- 🕸️ Memory Lane: still none… - 🕸️ Positives: gwen and peter… gwen's fate being so heavily foreshadowed… in the start of the movie him and gwen are together but he keeps being haunted by her father's face telling him to stay away from her to keep her safe… so he breaks up with her, but gwen being strong and independent calls him out for how messed up that is that she doesn't get to choose, and she ends up instead breaking up with him. anyway they're dorks and they get back together. all the tropes are there though, it's all foreshadowing. and then when her fate plays out…OUGH I love that scene cause he's so close to saving her but just a moment too late…just a few seconds earlier and she maybe wouldn't have been so close to the ground… - 🕸️ Negatives: everything else about this movie I fear. I really did not like harry, and I feel like electro became a complete villain a little suddenly? just my opinion. - 🕸️ Verdict: ily gwen I miss you. but 2/5. - 🕸️ Standout Scene(s): can I just yap about gwen's death a little more? it's the fact that through the whole movie, peter's been torn between "should I be with her or should I try to keep her safe because I promised her father I would?" and he ended up choosing to be with her and did indeed pay the price for that decision 💔💔 you can't even say "it isn't his fault" since this only happened because he made the wrong choice... and like, yes, gwen has her own agency, and she should be able to make her own choices, but the thing is gwen was always going to want to choose peter because she's not AFRAID of danger. she is the type to face danger head-on no matter what. so if you really wanted to keep her safe, you would have to remove her from the proximity of that danger entirely. it's the whole "if you love someone let them go" argument. peter decided he wanted to be happy with gwen, and gwen was on board with this decision, but it was hasty, and it was doomed to end the way it did… if you love someone and you KNOW that their love for you will inevitably put them in a dangerous position, the only way to really protect them is to let them go I think…and he didn't do that, and he paid the price, and he has to live with that forever 😔
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SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME.
- 🕸️ Memory lane: well it had lots of nostalgia in it so that was something probably… the first time I watched this wasn't so long ago, so it's not that memory laney otherwise though - 🕸️ Positives: it was fun to see some of these characters again, especially now that I have the full context! in case you live under a rock and don't know, this movie did a multiverse thing so it had the two previous spidermans along with the current marvel one, and also brought back some old villains, including norman osborn and otto! I enjoyed seeing them both the most. I also finally understood the scene everyone had been raving about before, where andrew garfield spiderman saves modern MJ in a scene that almost echoes him losing gwen… mmyes very emotions… very emotions indeed. - 🕸️ Negatives: UGH modern marvel is so frustrating it's all money capitalism franchise watch this then watch that we're going to buy the next decade of your life you better study our movies like they're homework GIVE US YOUR MONEY!!!! wait I said I wouldn't be wokE WAIITTT - 🕸️ Verdict: it was like eating candy, a good treat. not even giving it a rating cause I only watched it for dessert 😋 - 🕸️ Standout Scene: oh you know.
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IN CONCLUSION.
spiderman cool!!! I think fans of all and any spiderman movies should all live in harmony and peace and love. please don't take any of my opinions too seriously, I did dramaticize at parts but also, my opinions are simply that! opinions! and I don't ask anyone to change their opinions to fit mine.
thank you for reading! now go get 'em tiger...














