GENDER IS DEAD

Wiktor, 18 | they/he |mostly trans discourse but I post other political and gender-related things too | anti MOGAI |

[gender-is-dead]

Hi, my trans friend is trying to raise £300 to start hormone treatment! He is getting close but still needs a bit of help. He’s been identifying as trans for many years and only recently got the courage to finally transition after struggling with dysphoria for a long time.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/fund-for-medical-transition

Fund for medical transition, organized by Gabriel Jamroz

howdy! i’m Gabriel and i’ve been identifying as trans masculine for many years now. i wasn’… Gabriel Jamroz needs your support for Fund for

Please consider donating or sharing, it’s a small goal but it would mean everything to him

[firedrake]

@mutuals stop and think before you reblog a post that has the word “lgbtia+” in it. advice from your friendly intersex mutual, archy: STOP dragging intersex ppl into the lgbt community. idc if you think aces/aros are lgbt just stop dragging other ppl into this. stop putting a fucking i in the acronym. intersex isn’t a gender OR a sexuality- it’s a medical condition. we have time and time again asked for you guys to recognize this, time and time again asked for you guys to stay out of our issues, but you continue to misgender us and use us as props for your arguments. your “lgbtia+ positivity” isn’t nice, it’s hurtful, it literally makes me so dysphoric because i’m basically being told that my genitals and chromosomes somehow make me inherently nonbinary. i’m not lgbt because i’m intersex, i’m lgbt because i’m trans and gay. y'all aren’t being “inclusive” or “recognizing our issues,” most of the time y'all don’t even know what intersex means and it’s obvious when you group it in with genders and sexualities. by dragging us into the lgbt community you are misgendering so many people and intersexist as fuck.

[spooky-luka-deactivated20200830]

I loathe Cluster B anything around the hands of terfs. They love assigning NPD to trans women no matter how shitty it is to folks with those actual issues.

Right?? And calling people BPD just because they don’t like them

The cluster b ableism is unreal in radfem circles and it’s disgusting

[lesbian-lizards]

I’ve heard this ‘cluster-b’ concept tossed around a bit but I don’t understand what it means. How does it theoretically relate to trans people?

[spookyterf]

cluster B disorders are characterized by a fragile sense of identity, an exaggerated sense of victimhood, and an inability to withstand criticism or opposition without feeling like you’re dying. all of these are common within the trans movement, hence the association.

[doey-deactivated20200505]

all of these can be applied to any online niche community, radfem tumblr included. let’s see:

fragile sense of identity: radfems on tumblr are constantly fighting each other over who’s a real feminist and who isn’t based on individual choices, typically related to how much you conform to gender. young women attach themselves to the radfem label without doing any actual IRL activism, just to feel as if they belong somewhere.

an exaggerated sense of victimhood: many tumblr radfems feel personally attacked by trans women considering or calling themselves women even if these trans women give valid arguments as to why they use certain terminology, even if they are otherwise radical feminist allies or gender critical. some people on radblr even feel as if trans women just existing is an attack on all women.

inability to stand criticism and opposition: radical feminist tumblr is known for being extremely vicious towards people they argue with, even people in their own community. if a radfem has a more nuanced take on an issue than the general, most popular approach amongst radical feminists, she’s harassed.

but regardless, applying a psychopathology term to a movement or community is moronic armchair diagnosis nonsense. you are not a medical professional and this isn’t how diagnoses work either way.

signed, a person with BPD who knows how much of a nightmare it is to live with this disorder and would like people to stop using it as an ableist insult.

[gender-is-dead]

how can people call themselves “feminist” and simultaneously stigmatise a disorder that so many women suffer with is just beyond me lol 

[theminingengineer]

[tendie-defender]

The wore joker paint during that protest as well.

[unlimited-shitpost-works-deacti]

holy shit

[american--support]

What the fuck is going on in France? Is it still the yellow vest folks?

[tendie-defender]

Firefighters are protesting for better pay and better work conditions. And yes they are still having yellow vest protests. Earlier this month a yellow vest was shot in the back of the head by police.

[quinn-vica-deactivated20201222]

The kicker, when Police protested a couple months earlier for the EXACT same thing firefighters were there in support of them. Now they've turned their backs on the same people that helped them.

[wormdrool-deactivated20180314]

Northern Michigan Asylum located in Traverse City, Michigan

[fox-steward]

talking about detransitioned women

i love the perspective i’ve gained from gender critical feminists and radical feminists–in fact, i owe a great deal to it and to this group of women. but it is often difficult to engage in the discussions around trans people, especially when the topic of ‘trans regret’ comes up, or detransition in general.

‘trans regret’ is a real thing, but for many of us, transitioning was the best we could do at the time with the options we were presented. i don’t regret transition, because in many ways, it led me here. i’m still me, i’m happy, i’m healthy. i even like the way my body looks–the masculine parts, the feminine parts. i touch my body and it responds in kind–that feels beautiful. i make love with this body, lesbian love, and that feels beautiful.

i think that’s why it’s so difficult to read pretty judgemental things about detransitioned women’s bodies. words like “maimed” or “deformed” or “ruined” or “wrecked” are so hurtful. i can respect that some detransitioned women may feel this way about their bodies, but i don’t think it’s okay to use such loaded, emotionally heavy words about detransitioned women’s bodies if you’re not one yourself.

i know i don’t personally feel ruined; my body isn’t deformed or maimed. it is strong and lovely. it is healthy. it moves me about this world. it loves and receives love. it can be difficult to love my body 100% all the time, but for whom is that not the case? maybe a lucky few–and i mean among all women, not just detransitioned women.

society is always sending signals about how women’s bodies are lacking, should be tailored or styled, how they could be better, more attractive, etc. i don’t think it’s helpful or particularly kind for women who aren’t themselves detransitioned to speak that way about our bodies. loving oneself in spite of all the messages that tell us not to is hard enough, please don’t add your voice to that.

[hidetothink]

Walking out of a college LGBTQIA club

[grlreign]

no cool girls in 2019. only nagging harpies and hysterical bitches allowed

[satan-your-lord-and-savior-deac]

THIS INCLUDES TRANS WOMEN

[grlreign]

i promise you it doesn’t

[arminjuice-deactivated20210413]

i love how they always have to say explicitly that it “includes” TiMs (especially on posts that aren’t even their own). they read the word “woman” or “girl” and immediately know that it’s not about TiMs. it’s all performative. they know TiMs are men.

[gender-is-dead]

I hate the term TiM BUT the person above is kinda right. If you see a post about women and have to comment ”trans women too” then it means you literally don’t see trans women (or you think trans women are some different brand of women, which you try to argue against all the time)

[catchymemes]

Credit: @juliehangart

[drdrunkpigeon-phd]

The artist of this comic just outed themselves as a school bully.

I dreamed that the “other girls” would like me and be nice to me, and yknow, it never happened even when I tried as hard as I could to be friendly and likeable.

[redpillthereturn]

Artist: Hey maybe this “i’m not like other girls” mentality is kind of dumb because not all girls are catty and mean, some of them are normal nice human beings! This wonderful example of a human being: Well you must be a bully because i was bullied by other girls and that means they’re all terrible!

[drdrunkpigeon-phd]

Except that’s not what the comic is saying at all.

It’s saying “girls who are seen as social outcasts or antisocial are that way because they don’t bother talking to girls and girls are actually perfect angels who will accept you into their circle 100% of the time”

When that’s obviously not the truth, I’ve met so many people who will agree girls bully the most vigorously the worst. I’ve had so much done to me by girls; such as sexual assault, harassment, someone even tried to get me fired from my dream job for no reason other than petty hate; but I just have to suck it up (despite the fact feminists are allowed to screech about their man hatred all the time) and all my alarm bells going are off on reading this comic is what makes me an asshole? Ok I can live with that.

[exile-on-uwustreet]

You know what I need to comment on that because I remembered something.

Even the most assholeish guys who made cruel jokes and comments talked to everyone at the end of the day. They didn’t really ignore anyone, unless they had some huge drama over girls or whatever with each other. I could get teased all day for being an emo satan worshipper by a guy and he’d still talk to me like a normal person on the bus when we went home together.

Girls didn’t do that. Girls maybe pulled less shitty pranks and made less jokes in front of the whole class, but they made damn sure you knew you’re Not Like Them and they don’t want you around. They would glare, snark, giggle and whisper everytime you walk past, do everything in their power to avoid even standing next to you and generally act like you carry a deadly disease.

Maybe things have changed or they’re different in the US and girls really are perfect acceptant angels who spread kindness to everyone but somehow I doubt that and maybe we should stop blaming bullied girls for thinking they’re different and strange huh

[starrology101]

Why is everyone spilling their own trauma on OP’s nice anti internal misogyny post?

The girl in the post is not being bullied. She’s being standoffish (note the snooty nose in the air pose in the third panel) because she has a fucked up idea on what “other girls,” are like because of negative views on femininity (“other girls wear high heels and short skirts”) due to internalized misogyny (there’s nothing wrong with high heels and short skirts).

The “other girls,” she’s looking down on turn out to be kind, beautiful, smart, thoughtful, etc. They are not bullies. I’m sorry if you were bullied and that’s why you didn’t have a lot or any female friends but most girls aren’t like that. And the reason this post is important is because a lot of girls held onto to this very way of thinking (Taylor Swift’s “You Belong With Me” comes to mind) they were better than “other girls” who like the color pink and dresses and makeup and just generally being feminine because that made them stupid or vain or whatever and it’s toxic as fuck.

@drdrunkpigeon-phd You are an asshole. I’m sorry girls have been assholes to you, but that doesn’t give you the right to spew bile on OP’s post. All of my cloesest friends are women, I went to an all girls high school. Yes some girls are the worst, but not all girls are and the girls in this comic literally just stand around talking and smiling and laughing. They invite the ‘not-like-other-girls’ girl into their circle. Nothing in the comic indicates that they’re bullies. You’re projecting and you should’ve just made your own post if you felt THAT strongly about it.

[drdrunkpigeon-phd]

A fear of your bullies and abusers is absolutely not fucking internalised misogyny.

You really do not give a fuck about victims do you? Unless they fit your black and white world view I suppose. Perhaps victims are “spilling their own trauma” on this post because the message is kinda super shitty ?

If women are allowed to be weary of men and critize male positivity posts because of trauma why the fuck am I being hunted down for doing the same just because the aggressors are women? Hmmm

[starrology101]

“A fear of your bullies and abusers is absolutely not fucking internalised misogyny.”

🗣THAT’S YOU!

YOU have a fear of your bullies and abusers.

Not the girl in this comic, and not every other girl on the fucking planet who thinks shit like “I’m not like other girls.”

Again, stop pushing your own trauma on OP’s post, treating it as if it’s the only valid interpretation of this work when you damn well know that wasn’t OP’s intention. You have another perspective on why girls might be reluctant to befriend other girls?

👏🏽Make 👏🏽your 👏🏽own 👏🏽god👏🏽damn 👏🏽post.

This one is about internalized misogyny and there are some girls out there who need to see it.

[drdrunkpigeon-phd]

Are you aware that young girls (like mentioned in the notes) do not pull these ideas that they’re different and outcasts out of thin air? 9 times out of 10 when women act the way in this comic it’s because they’re being alienated by female peers, nothing to do with men or misogyny.

Why do some women, specifically feminists, HATE being told that women can do wrong?

[siryouarebeingmocked]

I’d love to know who our hero ‘internalizing’ this ‘misogyny’ from. And why it’s ‘misogynist’ for a girl - and only a girl - to over-value being unique from their peers, as adolescents often do.

I suspect there’s a big overlap between people who dislike INLOG girls, and people who say men in general need to act different from most men, who are  supposedly either misogynist or look the other way when they see misogyny (IE Toxic Masculinity).

[thespectacularspider-girl]

If the OP’s comic was about a gay boy wearing glitter and nail polish and loved fashion but played out the same way, you’d be fucking sure everyone would realize how bullshit it is.

And every gay guy who came out and said “no, that’s not how it works, I got beat the fuck up” would be listened to.

But no, please.  Tell us more about “internalized misogyny” when I got ostracized and called a dyke on the daily.  I’m sure if I tried to ‘fit in’ they’d have included me.

[gender-is-dead]

Nothing like turning a wholesome comic into an argument, huh? This comic is just showing the character development of a person who used to think she was special and better than the other girls because she had different interests. It’s the same shit as loners on the internet calling everyone a ”normie” because of a superior attitude/complex (I know because I’ve been there, done that, and I’ve also seen other people going through that). The girl in the comic realised she isn’t all that different after all and stopped being arrogant and elitist. She finally felt accepted by her peer group and it allowed her to overcome her superiority complex. That’s literally just it. Not that deep.

[gender-is-dead]

I want to delete my old shitty posts that I don’t agree with anymore but they kinda show how my opinions change over time so I like looking at them :/

However they do get an awful lot of attention from people and I don’t want others to assume that I still think these things that I said 1-2 years ago

[gender-is-dead]

people who yell at others for having “internalised transphobia” will be the same people who pretend that there is no difference between cis women/men and trans women/men. WHAT’S WRONG WITH ADMITTING THAT YOU’RE TRANS? why are you trying to convince people that trans women are 100% female and that trans men are 100% male? trans women are trans women. trans men are trans men. their identity should still be respected but they are trans and always will be

sounds like you are the one with internalised transphobia here if you can’t accept that

[ashtonsresearch]

Gender, Sexuality, Personality, and Mental Health

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Whether you’re able to take the survey or not, I’d appreciate any reblogs or distribution of the link elsewhere.

tldr: Take my survey for a chance to win $50 and be a part of cool research.

[gender-is-dead]

If anyone was curious why I was inactive here and what caused the sudden shift in my views (if you’ve noticed), it’s probably mostly because I’ve been reading up on a lot of detransitioners’ stories. While I still consider transitioning, I don’t think I will ever be able to look at the trans community the same way ever again

[shinra-makonoid]

Right... It really changes you.

[gender-is-dead]

It does...

[e-sadg]

The medical community is failing dysphoric people.

We’re not told that there are treatment options other than surgery and (what is by all means still experimental) hormone therapy. I had no idea when I first started transitioning that some people found relief by unpacking internalized misogyny, lesbophobia and ableism. I didn’t know that some people found exercise and mindfulness immensely helpful or that dysphoria could be caused or exacerbated by trauma. HRT ended up not being what I needed but even if it had been I still would have deserved to know. I still would have deserved informed consent.

And they’re not researching us or the effects of the treatments they give us. We don’t know what dysphoria is or what causes it. We don’t know what percentage of people desist from transition. We don’t even really know what hormone replacement therapy does to trans people’s bodies. You’ll hear all the time that doctors are divided on when or even if trans men need hysterectomies after being on testosterone. That’s because they don’t know. The medical world doesn’t even care enough about us enough to have spent the money and energy into figuring out if a drug they’re prescribing and selling to us will make a hysterectomy a medical necessity or not.

This is shit people should be mad about. This is shit people should be really mad about.

[ftmtips]

I’m posting alot of detrans stuff RN and like honestly all trans people should be fighting for a better medical system for people with gender dysphoria

[e-sadg]

The medical community is failing dysphoric people.

We’re not told that there are treatment options other than surgery and (what is by all means still experimental) hormone therapy. I had no idea when I first started transitioning that some people found relief by unpacking internalized misogyny, lesbophobia and ableism. I didn’t know that some people found exercise and mindfulness immensely helpful or that dysphoria could be caused or exacerbated by trauma. HRT ended up not being what I needed but even if it had been I still would have deserved to know. I still would have deserved informed consent.

And they’re not researching us or the effects of the treatments they give us. We don’t know what dysphoria is or what causes it. We don’t know what percentage of people desist from transition. We don’t even really know what hormone replacement therapy does to trans people’s bodies. You’ll hear all the time that doctors are divided on when or even if trans men need hysterectomies after being on testosterone. That’s because they don’t know. The medical world doesn’t even care enough about us enough to have spent the money and energy into figuring out if a drug they’re prescribing and selling to us will make a hysterectomy a medical necessity or not.

This is shit people should be mad about. This is shit people should be really mad about.

[peterthephoenix16-deactivated20]

Transition regret in the past has been shown to be extremely rare, that said please don’t rush into hormones and surgery. Understand the permanent effects, and be certain that they are what you want.

[gender-is-dead]

These statistics are incomplete. It’s very hard to measure how many detransitioners there *actually* are out there, since most of them don’t usually come back to the same doctor they’ve initially got their hormones/surgery letters from. Most detransitions go undocumented.

”Be certain that they [the effects] are what you want” is not a good advice since most detransitioners ARE usually certain it’s what they want. The popular notion that detransitioners are just cis girls (or rarely guys) who transition for fun is untrue and harmful. There is no such thing as ”real” trans people and ”fake” trans people. You never know who is truly trans or not. Detransitioners are often severely and diagnosibly dysphoric people, sometimes book examples of dysphoria too. The thing is, medical and social transition is for them just a coping mechanism to deal with that said dysphoria. For some people this coping mechanism will work and for some it won’t, or it will only work for a period of time.

You never know if the dysphoric person that you know, who is SO certain of their medical transition, will have the same level of certainty in a few years. It might be that years down the line, they will realise medical transition didn’t actually alleviate their dysphoria. As we know, medical transition can’t cure all dysphoria and very often it just shifts to somewhere else (for example a lot of people reported that after getting top surgery their chest dysphoria was gone, so they started focusing on other parts of their body- the dysphoria shifted). These people may realise that transition isn’t worth all the health risks that come with it, if it hardly helps them anyway. Putting cross-sex hormones in your body is potentially dangerous and there isn’t a whole lot of scientific knowledge on this. Sometimes, it might even heighten people’s dysphoria as they realise they will never look or sound like natal males (kinda like being on a plane but never arriving to any destination, just floating in space forever). Other times people realise that there were some deep issues in their psyche which led them to develop feelings of dysphoria and they might develop a more psychoanalytic approach to understand the roots of their dysphoria better. It’s what doctors usually overlook.

Some people just can’t be helped with transition. The current “affirmative care” approach most doctors have is flawed. This is why it’s CRUCIAL that we explore different ways of dealing with dysphoria. Medical transition should not be the only option available. Different forms of psychotherapy should be provided to those who can’t or don’t want to transition.

[gender-is-dead]

If anyone was curious why I was inactive here and what caused the sudden shift in my views (if you’ve noticed), it’s probably mostly because I’ve been reading up on a lot of detransitioners’ stories. While I still consider transitioning, I don’t think I will ever be able to look at the trans community the same way ever again