hotdog nachos

Insta: martyrme

[mistbornthief]

so true king

[therenobee]

(Walking out of the Chernobyl reactor core) "whew! Do NOT go in there!"

[trans]

Jesus was an empath for sensing that one out of his 12 boy toys was going to betray him.

[theweirdwideweb]

[straightboyfriend]

i was worried my cat is dehydrated because i never see him drink water so i’ve started leaving a cup of water that’s “mine” (aka he sees me drink out of it once before he does) in my room so he thinks he is being a rebellious naughty by drinking out of it but rlly he is just following my plan & being hydrated .

[aofvoid]

God in the Garden of Eden

[unyanizedcatboys]

Absolutely obsessed with the implications of this comment

[adhdbreadbin]

How To Validate A Child’s Work Without Swearing and Saying “Lil Dude That’s Fuckin Sick”

[jakesullypussyhair]

his cock was kafkaesque her pussy was lynchian can i make it anymore obvious

[thedevilsrain]

every single translator: get his ass

[fluffmugger]

Hungarians: What ass?

[deadshrike-deactivated20220125]

mothers are insane they'll come into your bedroom exhibit mental illness then just leave

[peanutpalace-deactivated2023011]

yes I'm at Wendy's yes my cunt is out

[peanutpalace-deactivated2023011]

they ain't the only bitch with a juicy $4 baconator

[fuxray]

[suigintou]

category 5 tummy event

[timidusaquilae]

#Alien (1979)

[foulserpent]

why do US military bootboys walk around in public in their cringe costumes all the time

[foulserpent]

everybody at this gas station MUST clap and cheer for the special boy on his big day out

[geniusoflove]

ya i can be your housewifey *burns the hellofresh meal i was making bc i was looking at my own ass for 5 minutes

[5oil]

[eyewtkas]

[incel-wheatley]

i could fix him but honestly whatever the hell is wrong with him is way funnier

[femmesandhoney]