Cheese Danish

my name is jess (she/her) 19 y/o my weaknesses are glitter and alfredo and am always down for LOTR marathons.

[thehybridlife]

[umameva]

the mother called her babies just for me ;;;

[chaifootsteps]

Blessed.

[missanthropologist]

the most blessed, pure thing…

[amorverde]

i hate when ppl make fun of me for trying 2 be positive and spread good vibes like fuck your bitter ass i spent a good portion of my short life being bitter and angry and suicidal if i wanna shoot sunshine out of my ass then i fuckin will 

[transmxnfenris]

the worst part is when their all “we can’t all be neurotypical, Karen” like listen, I’m not neurotypical I’m just trying to get better jesus

[fierceawakening]

Even Bigger Mood

[fantasticfelicityfox]

My favorite part about 1931 Dracula is that there are armadillos running around Dracula’s castle.

Look at this it’s like they couldn’t find any rats so they just were like “eh close enough no one will notice”. But I noticed. I noticed.

[fuck-yeah-classic-monsters]

“WE NAILED IT BOYS”

[mllemusketeer]

Apparently in the 20s and 30s, armadillos weren’t very commonly known, so moviemakers would use them wherever they needed some creepy, ‘demonic’ animal running around. So there were a lot of armadillos in early filmmaking, and it was often people’s only source of reference for armadillos.

Fast forward twenty years to when the father of the biology professor who told me this is driving out from the east coast to see his son in California. Crossing the southwest at night.

An armadillo runs across the road. 

He comes to a screeching halt and the Thing Of Evil, which he never knew was actually a real animal, trots the rest of the way across the road and vanishes into the desert.

Apparently it shook him up rather a bit.

[theblamegabe-deactivated2019102]

@mortalityplays

[protom-lad]

Ok but what about Dracula’s Bee.

A single, solitary bee with his own tiny custom-built coffin. 

[bloodcountessabendroth-deactiva]

Nobody ever talks about Dracula’s pet bee.

[little-miss-rasputin-pageant]

the armadillos I get, but I still don’t understand the solitary bee

why did it have a coffin?

did Dracula just love his pet be that much?

[wahbegan]

It’s not a bee it’s a Jerusalem Cricket, included for basically the same reason as the armadillo

[roguetelemetry]

excellent pre-halloween content

[protom-lad]

While that is a cool and good clarification, my question stands

Why did Dracula have a single solitary cricket with his own tiny-built coffin.

[hellwolf99]

Because he could.

[cultureshift]

This is the Memorial to the Missing and contains over 50,000,000 pennies to represent the lives of each American child abandoned to abortion by a society and a culture that has embraced their destruction. We must prevent the need to add to this memorial. Take a stand. Get involved.

 ”How we treat the least of us defines us.”

[seraphknights]

“should I use this $500k to help struggling parents and pregnant people or should I put it in a glass box”

[echoesoftheforsaken]

^ reblogged for the comment

[sweetmintchocolatewitch]

“money that can be useful for victims of rape and abuse is sitting in a glass box to remind us how we care more about the ‘lives’ of unborn fetuses than the lives of homeless children”

[saysomethinghuman-deactivated20]

The cognitive dissonance is stunning

[geeksofdoom]

We don’t care about people, we care about the idea of people.

[sheisraging]

Reblogging for all of the comments.

[buspir-deactivated20230127]

the notes are broken 😂

[calvin-reads-problem-sleuth]

Reblogging partly for awesome computer shortcuts, and partly because I wish to once again take part in a Post That Broke The Notes. 

[srsfunny]

Hospital T-Rex

[official-liberty-prime-deactiva]

Imagine being rushed into the ER and reading this as they push you through though

[king-in-yellow]

Lol when my appendix burst, I had initially refused to go to the ER because it was a Saturday night (which are always busy helltimes for ERs of course) - and when I arrived I was told there were eight people ahead of me. I agreed and just asked for something to drink and something for the nausea. They took my vital signs, looked at each other, and then whisked me back immediately to a room and within five minutes the ER attending physician came in (as opposed to a resident physician).

“Hahaha, holy shit, am I dying?” I asked him - because HOSPITAL T-REX IS CORRECT

[ionlylooklikeahipster]

Okay but the T-Rex has abs drawn onto it in pen.

[christopher-bryant]

P90 Rex

[firstrainofmay]

john cage’s 4’33” is fucking silence

someone put a copyright on the absence of sound

and then disabled the audio of a video

of the absence of sound

what a time to be alive

[jimtheviking]

#john cage would have been so happy #it’s so meta #he would have pissed his pants

[turhansbeycompany]

I think this is where I bring up the death metal cover of 4’ 33” someone did.

[teal-deer]

That death metal cover is fucking perfect

[diary-of-a-chinese-kid]

The arrow points the other way when FedEx is written in Arabic

[pr1nceshawn]

Reasons Why Retail Jobs are Harder than Office Jobs.

[raverenn]

And yet people don’t think retail workers should get a living wage. I’ve literally gotten a five cent raise myself.

[fun-ta-mental]

8 cent raise right here

[hellenecstatic]

FYI the name Dennis is derived from Dionysus. That is all.

[terpsikeraunos]

this means…denny’s….

[readerofmanyworlds]

Denny’s is absolutely the domain of a god of chaos and revelry

[teenbitch-deactivated20151216]

has anyone else’s life been really off lately or is it just me

[asspostate]

miss me with that ‘weapon accuracy’ shit. im shooting everything. im laying down cover fire. im shooting the walls. im shooting my teammates. im shooting myself. my accuracy is 100% yall just dont know what im aiming at

[babelady]

[posts-that-only-suck-a-little]

someone drew a portrait of this sleeping dog and gave it to him. amazing.

[iwishiwasyour-favouritegirl]

this guy thought the bear had been swept away for a second and im dying at his reaction because that’s 100% how i would react

[begoodtakecare]

i love this so much

[loveamongthesailors]

Bring back the phase of society where having your tiddies all the way out was fine but showing ankle flesh was scandalous

[moranion]

i know this is aiming at 17. and 18. and 19. century fashion, but i really wanna bring back those dresses that only basically start under the boobs, like that little number Minoan snake goddess figurine is wearing

[loveamongthesailors]

that was actually what i was thinking of! ive been obsessed with that figure since i was her in a history book as a kid lmao 

 the ultimate look!!! 2 titties out 2 snakes in hand 

[sapphiccygnet]

titties out, snakes up, she’s ready 2 go

[sabotender-bailarina]

ankles: covered

snakes: up

titties: out

[sabotender-bailarina]

I am forcibly removed from the historical narrative

[topgaynewz]

the babadook is the gay icon we didn’t know we needed