barry is canonically chubby you cowards

lydia, they/them | podcast sideblog (my main is @flutegremlin) | icon by @hemaris

[ginkasei]

list of things that will always get my goat

-el chupacabra

[ginkasei]

-the swedish, depending on the year 🔥

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Scripted Bracket — Round 5

Who is sexier?

Captain Isabel Lovelace

Mina Murray

Voting ended onNov 8, 2023

Propaganda

Captain Isabel Lovelace (Wolf 359):

Her everything <3 But in all seriousness WHAT is more sexy than a haunted, competent, funny, cursed, vengeful, mourning, badass, doomed woman?

listen to the run and hide speech and tell me that isn't the sexiest thing you've ever heard

Hot space lady who could kill me mmm yes please!

(sort of) twice-undead space captain who wired a bomb to her heart to make sure the crew of her ship didn't kill her before her escape shuttle got working. she's funny she's a genius she knows how to use a gun and she cares very much about her crew (despite the whole bomb thing).

#LOVELACE #idk who she’s up agaunst really tbf #but she cares so SO much #she gets boiled down to ’tough scary lady hot’ a lot (which 100% agree) but #she is heartbroken about her failure to keep her crew safe #and stubbornly wants to make sure none of it is in vain #even if it kills her #HOT. ​even apart from how hot her monologues and threats to hilbert are #also her and eifel laughing and getting along when they first meet her 😭 yall #anyway. lovelace 1000%. the defense rests

Vote Lovelace cuz of the way she says "Hi honey, I'm home" to the bastard who shot her in the head, and then how she proceeds to beat him up <3 Oh. And how she twists his arm and says "good boy". Yeah.

LOVELACE SWEEP LOVELACE SWEEP GO LISTEN TO HER RUN AND HIDE SPEECH AND WEEP THAT GODDARD AERONATICS EVER KILLED HER ENTIRE CREW AND ALSO HER (she recovered) AND MADE HER THEIR ENEMY

#LOVELACE SWEEP. DO NOT FUCKING LET ME DOWN #Lovelace is so much to me #Seen some people in the notes citing the run and hide speech#Which is very good #but my personal favorite Lovelace thing is variations on a theme #The cyclical nature of trauma #The lack of trust #The fear #the sadness #‘You can never go home. You were home. And now you’re back— and you can never go back.’ #Lovelace hearing Hera say something to her and #Thinking ‘what she’s actually saying is that I’m a demon and she would be glad to kill me in a slow and horrifying manner’ #Is so #I don’t agree that Lovelace is doomed either #Like #lovelace did die. But #She got out of that pain and trauma #How do you listen to her say that she is Isabel Lovelace #That she rejects the person that pain made her to be #And say she’s doomed

captain lovelace helped 12yo me realise I like women. She’s so hot. her threatening Hilbert is the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. isabel lovelace SWEEP

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Mina Murray (Re: Dracula)

As the winner of the Dracula sexyman bracket which ran before brackets were even a huge thing on tumblr and as a podcast character sort of now that re:Dracula is a podcast I think she deserves a place in this bracket

I would kill for Mina I would die for Mina etc

Mina helped everyone kill Dracula with her reports and memorization of the train schedules!

Mina got her mind invaded in order to be used as a puppet, and she took advantage of it by uno reversing the mind link to hunt down and kill her tormentor. Twice a day she gets into a state of being buried alive to achieve it. She dreads vampirism yet she's using her vampirism to her advantage. Her man vowed to become a vampire for her. He hates vampires. Yet he will offer his throat to her only.

Mod Note: This poll is about podcast characters, please only vote and offer propaganda for the Mina Murray in Re: Dracula.

[sacred-portal]

[commsroom]

"such a big, big universe, and you only ever gave yourself the tools to think about a tiny portion of it" is such a striking line because at its core it is - like everything in am i alone now? - about loneliness.

i think a lot about the writers saying that eiffel tends to drive conversation in a scene, while hera more often resists it - that eiffel is defined more by what he says, and hera is defined more by what she doesn't say. eiffel is good at getting hera to open up, but he can take things at face value, and really listening to hera means he needs to learn what she says isn't all of what she means. she has to navigate both vocal restrictions and social barriers that he does not.

and hera's monologue in am i alone now? lives at the heart of what she can't say. it's this contrast of emotions between the connection she desires and the isolation she feels doomed to. the frustration that she's always there, but equally feels she's never really anywhere. she wonders aloud if she'd miss eiffel, but she doesn't really wonder. she's rationalizing her loneliness, current and dreaded future, but she knows - when she talks to nobody, she's talking to him. she observes the last gasp of a distant star, and her thought is of him; she watches a solar storm, and wishes she could describe it to him in a way he could understand. she calls him doug.

the irony, of course, is that hera's perspective is also very small and very personal, and that her desire is not to understand more of the universe, but for her part of the universe to be understood. the idea of giving names to colors no one else can see is a powerful metaphor when taken in the context of being surrounded by people who, even if they care, fundamentally cannot understand what it's like to navigate the world as a person like you. and i think there's something equalizing (and humanizing) in acknowledging that every person's experience is individual and subjective, and that all communication is just an attempt to bridge the gap.

so i don't think it's an appeal to the big picture, or even so much a statement of wonder, as much as it is an expression of a very simple, very human desire: i wish you were really listening to me. i wish you could see the world as i see it.

[lazylittledragon]

pov: they saw you from across the room and think your vibe is disgusting

[disastervaxildan]

my favorite thing about griffin as a dm is that he taught himself how to write and produce original music for taz but refused to learn the 5e ability checks

[mellifera38]

So uuuuh this is NOT FINISHED. Also it was sketched out like two years ago when I first listened to Wolf 359. I recently started relistening and I remembered I started this again. It has haunted me that I never got it done bc I was really excited about it. It was the companion piece for the version I did of Eiffel. So anyways I'm posting the rough Work in Progress sketches for posterity. Feels like a waste to just let it rot hidden deep in my hard drive and at this point... yeah I don't think its gonna happen I'm sorry haha. Not unless I suddenly get a lot of free time (not likely unless I win the lottery).

[commsroom]

the first thing minkowski does when she arrives at the hephaestus, before she wakes the rest of her crew up, is get into the role of commander. like she's reciting her lines before she has to go on stage. minkowski's love of musical theater is framed in contrast to the image she presents, but that's just it. it's a carefully cultivated image, the type of person she thinks commander minkowski should be. she's read all the manuals. she's memorized the survival guide. she knows her lines. she's so initially caught up in doing things the "right" way, in playing the role of commander, that she fails to authentically be in command.

there are two things here, both of which cutter uses to manipulate her: 1) minkowski has been outcast and overlooked for her immigrant upbringing, and she desperately wants to prove that she belongs, and 2) she craves certainty and purpose, and wants to believe there's a way to make sense of her misfortune. that's what appeals to her about sunday in the park with george: "the guy who sings it is this famous french painter, and his entire life is kinda falling apart. but he can always turn what's happening around him into these beautiful paintings." at least from a performance perspective, there's a way that her interest in musical theater makes just as much sense as her military career: there's a certainty to it, and an authority to appeal to. a role to perform, a script to follow, an expected way that everything will play out.

(and so maybe it's interesting to consider her application was for writing musical theater, in the creation of her own vision rather than the execution of someone else's, and she was rejected from that.)

there's some resonance between minkowski treating her life as a performance, and eiffel viewing himself as a character in a narrative. he views the world through a pop culture lens, ascribes an archetype to her, which she plays into and reinforces. that distorted perception of each other is at the core of a lot of miscommunication, and so, a lot of their early conflict. the dynamic between minkowski and eiffel is arguably the most central to the entire show, and i think there's something in that progression: of needing to be capable of seeing both yourself and others as full, complex, contradictory people with intricate inner lives before you can really communicate with them.

[mobydyke]

one of the best parts about the wolf 359 time loop episode is that it's normal. there's no doubt about her telling the truth. like, lovelace says "this sounds crazy but I think I'm in a time loop" and minkowski just says "yeah that happens sometimes"

[glockmonkey]

zach valenti could be star lord but chris pratt could never be doug eiffel

[cosmicrhetoric]

yeah i really have to respect wolf 359 for priming its audience’s tolerance of insane situations so well. like the toothpaste siege was literally episode two but seeing minkowski, who’s the by the book member of the team, smash that mf neurotoxin gas button at literally the drop of a hat sure did prepare us cause suddenly the star is baja blast and whamma jamma and then its the finale and the main villain is like “i can catch bullets” and we’re all like of course he can catch bullets this makes complete sense 

[cosmicrhetoric]

forgot to mention the characters have to go thru this too after three years lovelace is like uh guys i know you won’t believe me but we’re in a time loop and minkowski just goes uh huh yeah that happens sometimes. what about it

[twoheadedcalfsanctuary]

agent glass, earnestly trying to flirt: HOW DO YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING TO DIE JUNO

[wlwormz-deactivated20220115]

girlboss is a gender neutral term and marcus cutter is a girlboss

[mosswolf]

god it's so weird that ive been in podcast fandom for like, four years, and now we're in a time where people don't know what the bright sessions is... is this how old people feel when they see things that teens are into??? im fjdfkdh

[radiosandrecordings]

Me, standing on my porch looking out: You kids these days with your ‘fabric rustles’ and ‘carte blanch found family’! In my day, we listened to Caleb Michaels have a breakdown to his therapist and we liked it! And if we were extra good, Night Vale would bring out the Mara Wilson for us to all sit around and cheer! 

[mosswolf]

spiritually, we have rocking chairs and are shaking our fists at noisy kids down the street

[radiosandrecordings]

#we listened to zach valenti voice twenty characters at once and it was good enough for us!!!!

It was just him, Lauren Shippen, Joshua Ilon and the entire ensemble cast of Wooden Overcoats against the world 

[celestialsblues]

Me, looking out the window at the hooligans: You kids will never understand the old days! When I was young we had to scour the internet for content! We had our nightly rituals of seeing which wolf 359 or bright sessions actor was gonna be the side character in the next up and coming podcast that would finish half a season then disappear off the face of the earth!!

[possibledemonspawn]

ok wait I can't decided whether it's funnier if Garfield the Deals Warlock wasn't inoculated and just heard static all over the moonbase OR if Lucretia met him and said hell yeah brother drink up

[anistarrose]

“none of the seven birds except Taako and Lup knew each other before the mission” is obviously a great dynamic, but I think it would be even funnier if biology professor Merle Highchurch gave Barry the one A-minus he ever received in college, and Barry was salty about it but they never interacted again until getting assigned to the same Fantasy NASA mission decades later

[sleepdeprivedsurgeon]

the carte blanche crew is so funny because. why is juno there. we got buddy as the leader, rita as the hacker, vespa as the medic/knife girl, peter as the con artist and thief, and jet as the driver/mechanic, but why is juno there? if he’s the muscle, he’s bad at it, and even though he’s back to his sharpshooting glory, he couldn’t shoot a gun when buddy hired him. he’s literally just there to complain, look pretty, pretend to be peter’s wife sometimes, and work through his issues. buddy took one look at him and said “this lady ain’t gonna set foot in a therapist’s office but maybe if i pay him to occasionally talk about his feelings with me and his bf and his ex-secretary he’ll feel better.” fucking hilarious thank u penumbra podcast

[inkedinserendipity]

fjldksfjaldjak, juno steel, the penumbra podcast, tpp, on a speculative note…i could believe buddy hired juno because he has such a different approach from everyone, like….if jet or nureyev had been in juno’s place when vespa turned up at the bar to steal the curemother prime….vespa would almost certainly be dead, in a lot of ways most of the members of the carte blanche have become a bit desensitized to their lives as criminals, like how we saw with the curemother heist, like at a certain point they forget to stop and ask why people do what they do because as thieves they’ve ‘been here done that’, 'eh people are weird whatever let’s get this over with i know what i’m doing’ type of situation, but juno has learned to be very sensitive to why people do what they do and he would never shoot to kill before he knows for absolute—, —certain what his target’s intentions are malicious to the point that like…he would need to kill them to protect his family, juno is a necessary reminder to always stay on top of the human element…the 'why’ of any given situation, to stop and say 'hey no actually this doesn’t make sense and you can’t rely on your past experience for this one’, a lot of the time his whinging is just whinging but if you can figure out when to pay attention to it he may just save your life (via @cushfuddled​)

rab these tags are so good!!