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@golsaileachreblogs
Reblog this photo of a kƤpylehmƤ to have a kƤpylehmƤ in your blog
It's a trick! If you reblog you get TWO kƤpylehmƤs in your blog!
They're traditional Finnish toys, little cows made out of spruce cones, on their way to see the world from one tumblr blog to another
i think the funniest interpretation of gracerocky is rocky falling first AND harder all while grace is oblivious to his own feelings cuz it goes like
grace: ur my best friend of all time :D i love you rocky!
rocky, with unbridled, barely controlled lust: rocky love grace too
This deleted scene killed me š Imagine 4 years of this. Sleepover of all time LMAOOO
Whatās in the bag: Ryland Grace style
(Getting dragged along to meetings means bag searches happen quite often. He is NEVER ready)
Credit for the list goes to @official-dr-ryland-grace
Half Goblin, half Hobbit.
Goblit.
God dammit I did this just for a pun but now Iām imagining this whole backstory where a wounded female goblin flees from some battle and winds up on the edges of the Shire and sheās gonna jump some Hobbit dude named Blinko Tumbrush but Blinkoās so unfailingly polite that his first reaction on seeing someone in a rough situation is to invite them in to dinner and gobbo chick is just like āā¦ uhā¦ ākay.ā
And then she has dinner and itās the best thing sheās ever eaten and even her little green brain is able to put together āIf I knife this guy so I can take his stuff he canāt cook more of thisā so when he asks her to stay the night sheās just like āFuck yeah breakfastā.
And all the other Hobbits in the area are staring at this new arrival who starts begrudgingly working in the garden (she can pull out the weeds theyād normally have to hitch livestock to) and theyāre all thinking āUhhhhh thatās a fucking Goblin there, chiefā except if they actually acknowledge that sheās a goblin then itās a huge to-do and a lot of excitement and possibly there would be adventure involved in chasing her off. So they just sort of silently, collectively decide theyāre going to ignore it and all go āOh, Blinko finally found himself a lady, how nice, she must be one of the Glumbrushes from over the far side of West Farthing, I always did hear they were on the homely side, not much hair on their feet you know.ā
And eventually in due time along comes Korbo Tumbrush and decently cute Hobbit baby but the biggest fucking ears you ever saw on a Hobbit and heās a bit green and everyone is thinking āThatās a fucking half-Goblin youāve got there, chief, you fucked a fucking Goblin, you made a baby with a damn Goblin my guyā but this would be an immensely rude thing to say to someone so theyāre just like āOh how nice, Blinko, he looks just like you, has those Glumbrush eyes though.ā
And Korbo the Goblit grows up a proper little man in his waistcoat and pipe and every so often someone visits from a different part of the shire and sees this plump green dude with massive flappy pointed ears and they start to open their mouth only for a local to leap right in and go āHAHA YES THAT IS KORBO TUMBRUSH A VERY UPRIGHT HOBBIT WE ALL LOVE KORBO HEāS GLUMBRUSH ON HIS MOTHERāS SIDE (WE THINK) THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING!!!ā and the visitor just starts nodding along emphatically because this is clearly something that is Not Spoken Of.
I fuckin love it
I. I have to know ā¦
Does Korbo know!? Like is the Gobit aware his momma is a goblin? Or does he just grow up like
āyup us Glumbrushes sure do look differentā
He leaves home on an adventure and stumbles n a hoard of goblins marches right up like
āhow do ya do fellow hobbits? You know Iām half Glumbrush myselfā
Alright, so, Korbo got in a fight once.
Once.
The Tumbrushes are, as a family trade, purveyors of fine pieces of wood. Not of large amounts of lumber, for which Hobbits donāt have a particular lot of call save occasionally, but rather of particularly nice pieces suitable for the making of fine window trimmings, floors, or the occasional carved bit of artwork to be given at a fancy event. Obviously for this one doesnāt go cutting down any tree willy-nilly, and Korbo had spent most of the day out and about looking for suitable trees.
(Korbo also personally assisted in cutting them down, being rather well known as on the strong side for a Hobbit, wink wink, nudge nudge.)
Having put in a genuine hard dayās work and rather pleased with himself, Korbo retired to the local bar to have a few beers and a smoke and to partake in good company, all of whom had gotten so used to pretending there was nothing odd about him that it was almost as if there was genuinely nothing odd about him.
Until along comes Humdil Thumbletoe.
Now the Thumbletoes were what was known in the Shire as āexperts on genealogyā. This might sound like quite a good thing when you consider how well-versed most Hobbits are in their family lines, until you consider that most Hobbits are already well-versed in their family lines. A Hobbit being thoroughly knowledgeable of their family tree is not much to be remarked upon, so when it is remarked upon it is more to mean that the Hobbits in question are such tremendous mooches that they have had to dive far more deeply into their bloodlines looking for more relatives to leech off of than any Hobbit would generally consider polite.
Humdil was fairly brawny as Hobbits go, which was about all you could say for him. In fact Humdil had realized that was really all that could be said for him and had become a bit of a bully. And so it was he entered the bar that night with a very put-upon third cousin twice removed (by marriage) and caught sight of Korbo for the first time.
āWhy, look at that one!ā he bellowed, guffawing. āHeās so ugly his mother had to have been a Goblin, ey!ā
The whole bar goes quiet. Aside from the obvious abominable rudeness of this, Humdil has said the thing that is never supposed to be said, and is clearly too stupid to realize heās right. All heads slowly turn to Korbo.
Now, it is well known that Korbo has inherited his fatherās tendency to never give a single solitary hairy-toed fuck about anything. He has currently been in the running to be at least the second most chill dude to ever be born in the Shire. And indeed, right now heās still looking perfectly calm, puffing on his pipe. He sets the pipe aside, finishes off the last of his beer, and stands up.
āSir, weāll be needing to step outside.ā
Now Hobbits are mostly a peaceable lot, not given to wars or fighting for any old thing, but a bit of fisticuffs outside the bar is hardly unheard of. Mostly everyone is kind of nervous about this because theyāre still not sure how Korbo is reacting to this whole Goblin thing. So someone takes Korboās jacket and Humdilās third cousin twice removed (by marriage) grudgingly takes his, and the two square off.
Now, Humdil was a big Hobbit, it was true, but there were a few things that, being a moron who didnāt realize he was right, and who had never been outside the Shire or seen a Goblin anyway, he could not possibly know.
For one, Goblins have long, spindly arms, giving them a surprisingly good reach for their sizeā¦ not abominably long, certainly not in the case of a half-Goblin, and certainly not above being concealed by the cut of a well-tailored shirt. Second, they are compact, wiry creatures, with dense muscle over their otherwise lanky forms, and given to that a Hobbitās already greater mass and the anchoring benefit of large, wide feet, well.
The moment Humdil stepped forward and started to swing, Korboās fist shot out like one of Gandalfās better rockets and struck him directly in the nose. His flight was also, for some weeks after, compared to one of Gandalfās rockets, though not quite as far and the explosion at the end was mostly him laying on the ground cursing wetly due to all the blood streaming from his nose.
Korbo apologizes profusely to all and sundry for the disturbance, collected his jacket, and goes home. Honey is out picking mushrooms (still being of the more nocturnal persuasion after all these years), but Blinkoās sitting by the fire reading a book. Korbo sees that thereās a newspaper (full of lots of extremely important things like how the pipeweed was growing and which barrels of beer were going to be uncasked that month), so picks it up and sits down to read.
āEvening, Da.ā
āEvening, son. Pleasant evening out?ā
āOh, fine. Save for I broke Humdil Thumbletoesās nose for him.ā
āHm, hm, I see. Why did you feel the need to do that?ā
āWell, he called Ma a Goblin, you see.ā
Blinko slowly lowers his book, and slowly raises his head. Looks at Korbo for long moments. Raises one eyebrow a little.
āSon. You know full well your mother is a Goblin.ā
āWell, yes, but he didnāt know that, and he said it as an insult anyway so it being true or not doesnāt really matter that much, does it?ā
āHm, hm. I suppose thatās true at the end of the day, isnāt it?ā
Blinko goes back to reading his book. Korbo continues reading the paper.
āYou could have stabbed him,ā Blinko eventually notes.
āAye, could have stabbed him,ā Korbo agrees easily enough. āBut itās a bit of a mess, isnāt it?ā
āTrue, true, probably would have been a bit of a mess in the road, not very thoughtful to the community,ā Blinko allows.
And that was the end of it.
I love all of this so much. Also-
āSir, weāll be needing to step outside.ā
The power. I set down my drink after that one.
Oddly enough, one might expect Korbo to have trouble finding a lady hobbit. Heās not given to being as plump as his fellows, and his feet are a bit small, and heās rather, well, tall for a hobbit, isnāt he. And green. Always looks a bit like heās eaten something that didnāt agree with him.
But he runs into Hilda Greebrook one day in town, and sheās lost her favorite pipe, which is of course a tragedy of the highest order. Itās not unheard of for a lady to smoke, but it isnāt particularly encouraged, either, and so the general reaction is āyou poor dear, perhaps itāll turn up, hadnāt you best be getting home for luncheon?ā
Korbo, however, stops to help her look for the pipe, and when itās nowhere to be found he offers to make her another just like it, if she can tell him what precisely made it so special that it was a favorite, for after all a favorite must be distinguishable by something.
Unfortunately the thing that distinguishes it is that she got it from Gandalf and itās quite unlike most pipes in the Shire, so recreating it is quite the task. But Korbo sets himself to it anyway, working a bit each night and handing it to Hilda daily to see if it feels quite right, and six months later heās done itārecreated a pipe that came from the world of men, or perhaps elves, but certainly not that of hobbits.
Hilda for her part discovers Korbo quite likes to read, and though heās from a reasonably well-to-do familyāfor hobbits are always in need of new toys and fancy party decorations after allācanāt get his hands on books fast enough to satisfy himself, and, well, her daās a transcriber, someoneās got to write out the papers after all, and sheās got access to practically every book in the Shire, and ways to make copies besides.
At first people think itās odd, a hobbit who canāt see asking to borrow books, but then they find out Korbo is involved and asking questions could lead to excitement and so they absolutely do not ask and simply offer up their histories and books of poetry and hobbit folklore (for even without want for excitement there are things itās good to remember, and things every hobbit child should know so they, too, can grow up properly plump and staying well away from adventure), and resign themselves to never seeing their books again.
And then they find that far from their books quite disappearing, they return in fine formāalbeit usually in a timeframe rather too long to be politeābut oddly quite a lot seem to have tiny bits of wood shavings in, although one wouldnāt expect it in a hobbit home? And THEN Hoptus Redbranch finds Korbo one day in his workshop, heās just stopped by for the wood to repair a door after an unfortunate incident with attempting to remove a colony of bees and rather too much smoke for the moving of bees, and Korbo is simply. Pressing small pieces of hot iron into a very thin piece of wood, making small triangle patterns like no hobbit decoration Hoptus has ever seen, and heās quite frequently checking into a book on his left that turns out to be one of Hoptusā own books, and very carefully turning the pages with a cloth so as to not get oil from the hot iron all over the pagesā
āand THEN, not long after the news of Korboās strange woodburning activities have spread across most of the Shire (and caused no small amount of consternation, because goblins are clever but so often the things they make are cruel and the cause of ever so much unpleasantness), Hilda is seen in her own garden with Korbo with a stack of these thin pieces of wood all carefully hinged together, running her fingers over carefully sanded and varnished pieces and feeling the triangles and reciting a hobbit tale.
For all those months of strangely disappeared books, Korbo has been translating Westron into an alphabet that can be read with oneās fingers, and making Hilda books, and teaching her to read them.
Nobody is entirely surprised, after about three years, when the two of them vanish for a few months, and come back quite married.
Within a few generations, this is absolutely going to be a thing Not Worth Remarking Upon. So when a young hobbit finds themselves accidentally ripping the knobs off doors when theyāre cross, their parents will sigh and the elder hobbits in the village will remark that āthatāll be the Glumbrush in āim coming through, I told you his ears were a little bigger than his siblings, didnāt I?ā much the same as they always did on Bilbo and Frodoās Took relations and the resulting hankering for adventure.
Were anyone from the outside to visit the Shire, theyād find a small colony of goblins thoroughly intermarried and also avoiding the usual goblin tendencies towards stabbing, so long as no one is so gauche as to insult them for being goblins.
(Sooner or later, one very flustered hobbit is going to accidentally do the same thing with an orc.)
The Tumbrushes, as with all Hobbits, were quite proud of their work, and rightly so. Their works are fine, of the highest quality, and they fetch the appropriate price for their labors, making them quite well-to-do. In the Shire, wealth breeds respect, of course, and so the Tumbrushes are quite well respected.
And yet thereās a difference between āwell to doā and āscandalously wealthy.ā
So when, when Blinko Tumbrush recieved a letter inviting them to the Baggins residence for tea, he of course brought his wife and son along.
Now, Korbo had crossed paths with Bilbo Baggins a time or two in the market, never for much longer than the time required for Polite Conversation, and so wasnāt expecting much. Sure, everyone knew Bilbo was odd, and were willing to talk about it, since Bilbo made no effort to hide his adventures and had, on numerous occasions, commented on visiting the elves or poking around the mountains, but they were in the Shire, no adventure in sight, and so this should be a normal, proper visit between client and craftsman.
And then Bilbo opened the door, pipe in hand, took the three of them in, and said, quite out of nowhere, āAh, Shoebiter clan.ā
Honey Tumbrush, late of the Shoebiter clan of the Misty Mountains, smiled with all her teeth and replied āDragon thief!ā
Bilbo guffawed and waved them inside, offering them hospitality in the goblin tongue, with the guarantee of safety and threat of violence that implied. They had arrived in time for second breakfast, and didnāt leave until past dinner, having hammered out a contract and shared many a story.
Blinko Tumbrush had only one thing to say as he walked home, arm in arm with his wife and son trailing behind. āHeās an odd fellow, that Bilbo, but nice enough. Yes, nice enough indeed.ā
I love them
Gets better and better every time I see it
What was removed?! Which guidelines did it violate? This post was complete last time I saw it.
Hereās my art that apparently was too much for tumblr!
Iād probably have rebageled anyway, but because of the Tumblr content removal, I *HAD* toā¦
I want this to be a short film, WITH NARRATION
Far in the distant west, near the Halls of Mandos, Nienna weeps a few happy tears for this daughter of the Shoebiter clan and her descendants; that they have found happiness and taken steps toward freedom from the horrors wrought by Morgoth and his followers.
And if Honey Tumbrushās garden always blooms beautifully after the rain? Well. Perhaps Gandalf got his love of hobbits from his teacher.
iām losing my mind
STOP REBLOGGING THIS my phone is glitching an astronomical amount and I immediately knew the culprit was one of my tumblr posts gaining traction
oh
GROOVE WITH ME BABY
Ya gotta have
āØāļø SOUL āļøāØ
DONT STOP ME NOW!
Idk man itās so easy to get bogged down in all the bullshit online but when my then-6 year old cousin found out I was trans he said āokā then corrected my grandma when she misgendered me. I was once the third between a gay man and a lesbian. Two lesbians once invited me back to their place when I presented as a man. I met an AMAB nb butch who looked strikingly to outsiders like a cis man and it was one of the more sapphic experiences Iāve had. I nervously wore a boydyke shirt to pride and got 3 different cis-looking femme folks tell me they loved my shirt. I once told a trans group at a protest that any pronouns were fine for me and one person said āwow, Iām impressed and intimidated by people like that. I donāt know that I could be that chill with pronouns.ā I once told a GNC friend I wished I could wear a type of āoppositeā gender clothing after I had already transitioned and so it would be associated with my AGAB and he said āYou could just do it.ā Iāve had cishet men fight cops for me before. The first time I had a doctor ask me if my name was different than what was on my forms I had to try not to cry. Last week, a phone call with a doctorās office where I am generally cis passing asked unprompted if my name listed is what I want to be called. It touched me then too. I told a lesbian friend once I felt like my attraction to men AND women both felt gay. She said āmakes sense.ā And we moved on. I go by different pronouns in different circles. Iāve had gay women love my facial hair. Iāve had gay men like my tits. Itās all out there, I promise. It can be hard to find it but I promise there is community like you and community who likes you. And itās more messy and beautiful than tumblr discourse makes it out to be.
These are from the last 8 hours only. And not all of them.
We're here! We're here we're here we're here!
Check the notes! There are so many of us and so many who love us.
Queer love, baby!
Can you guys tell I don't draw Simon often
headcanon that Grace grades the other scientists work only if heās focusing on something else or heās tired.
Like. Imagine one of the scientists studying Astrophage gives Grace a paper detailing their recent findings and Grace being locked in on something else, he just looks up, skims the paper, then pulls out a red pen from somewhere and marks it, āB+, you forgot to account forā¦ā then after a 5 minute lecture on how to improve, he goes back to typing or smth. The scientist just standing there baffled thinking āB+? What are we in? A classroom?ā, and kind of bum hurt that they only got a B+ (bc ofc they want an A) so they go back to researching with a new ferocity cuz dammit theyāre going to get that A. Cue the science team being fueled by Dr.Graceās grades, them just rubbing it into each others faces if they get Aās or A+ās. Headcanon 2 is that he just keeps gold star stickers in his pockets so for example: All of them are in a meeting, Dr. smth pipes up with a good suggestion and he goes, āGreat job! You get a gold star.ā And just puts it on their phone case or badge and moves on, everyone is flabbergasted and a bit jealous except for the scientist who is just vibrating with happiness and a bit of fear because the co-dictator of the world just gave them a gold star.
Extra: Grace also hits Stratt with the 1 2 punch of āA+! Hereās a gold star.ā On one of her presentations after staying up for 36+ hours and slaps a gold star on her forehead before conking out on the desk. Carl is in the corner desperately trying not to laugh bc Grace just did this in front of the entire Petrova task force while Stratt is just staring at him in confused amusement. Extra-extra: The mess hall on Strattās Vat has a āFridge-boardā which is a magnetic board acting as a fridge for all of their papers with Aās on it. Grace just being mortified when he learns that heās been grading and giving gold stars to the top minds of the world and Stratt having to assure him that is boosts morale and that itās fine.
(Once he gets sent off to space, everyone in the task force keeps their stars to remember him, because he never said goodbye.)
(Eva looking at her star and throwing it away, because she couldnāt stand the thought of having a gold star from the man she killed.)
Deleted scene
technically it would make sense for rocky to be very busy once they arrive on erid. even when factoring out adrian, he sure as hell has got to answer to a lot of curious/shocked/relieved/judgmental eridians and help out with all kinds of stuff.
but i think it would be much more likely (and funny) if rocky is just like. a very scared cornered kitten that just got placed in a new environment. sure, erid is his home but at that point he's not been there for like 50 years and he's gotten so used to human behavior, to grace's behavior, that he may as well be the equivalent of an autistic eridian, struggling with eridian social expectations and norms, questioning every stupid rule he's grown up with, using human phrases and quirks, etc. idk i just like the idea of giving rocky a sprinkle of homegrown autism
and he is still constantly at grace's side, not just for grace's comfort and sanity, but for his as well. grace is there for him, he chose him over earth after all, the only familiarity amongst a huge planet that has probably long declared him dead, the only one anchoring him to this crazy new reality they're in.
Rocky dumbing down his speech for Grace only reinforces the idea that Grace is a kid in the other Eridians eyes and multiple conversations are happening at once..
Eridian scientist: why did they send a baby to space?!
Rocky: Grace is not a baby. Heās a fully grown human and you all need to respect that-
At the same time another Eridian: the human is thirty!! Are you COMPLETELY sure heās not a child? Heās barely coordinated!
Rocky: Grace is very sick!! Of course heās not coordinated you fucking idiot-
ALSO at the same time: did you not think to teach him how to understand us properly?? Let alone communicate with us.
Rocky: he doesnāt have the vocal cords for most of our sounds!! And we were WORKING on him being able to understand proper speech but heās delirious?! The fact heās conscious is a miracle-
Grace who is visible stressed and half covering his ears but also trying to listen: whatās going on?? I canāt hear you guys itās too loud- Rocky whatās going on?!
Rocky: apology apology other Eridians ask dumb dumb dumb questions, Rocky tell Grace later. Grace sleep now Rocky handle.
Grace just nods with bleary eyes and knocks out almost immediately, and the other Eridians are giving Rocky the equivalent of a raised eyebrow in unison.
(rocky voice) human atmosphere too cold even through xenonite insulated suit! let rocky in grace skin! does grace want rocky to almost freeze to death again, question
Saw this twitter post and instantly started looking for pictures of Stratt to use it with
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there. I did not die.
Grace must get very cool about many things very quickly statement
