totally a real human person

i reblog stuff i find funny or interesting in FI/EN. sometimes i might say something. tma/tmagp/malevolent sideblog @magn-animously

[honey-lys]

has anyone figured out how to be a real person yet

[chirasul]

just me. and i'm NOT telling

[gutmunchies]

what the fuck. come on

[huntress1013]

Yesterday, Disney asked users on Threads to use Disney quotes to show how they are currently feeling. To say that this did not go according to Disney's plan would be an understatement 😂

They deleted the thread, but they should know that this doesn't help because now the videos are making their rounds 🤣😂

[yesornopolls]

If I were to ask you "can I have a cigarette?" would you understand the reference?

If I were to ask you "can I have a cigarette?" would you understand the reference?

Yes

No

Remaining time: 6 days 11 hours

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

so strange when people assume 'waking up early' means increased productivity bc no??? im awake so i can read fanfic in bed before breakdown

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

BREAKFAST

[i-am-a-fish]

let’s pour one out for all the janitors who clean and never get enough appreciation

[elainapoststhings]

Don’t they gotta clean up what we pour out

[i-am-a-fish]

fuck stop it everyone the post is cancelled everyone please stop fuck what have I done

[andersonsallpurpose]

let’s clean one up for the janitors

[basuralindo]

Do we have any updates about the kiosk?? Thats such a spoof comedy show episode plotline its hard to believe its real. What other plotlines have you lived through?

lmao yeah I'm glad that I got pictures and there's two other people verifying it because it really does feel unbelievable (fdr the kiosk for sale was just a bit. that's not my kiosk. it apparently is for sale though). As far as updates go, you can search my blog for #boba yaga, #updates, or #the kiosk disappearance mystery for anything new, but I explained the latest (boring) details in this post yesterday.

As far as other plotlines go, there's been a lot and I can't remember all of them offhand atm. My whole childhood was full of wacky shit but most of it can't be told without heavy allusions to child abuse/endangerment/neglect which spoils the fun for a lot of people, and there's some really good ones that involve my family but not me directly, so idk if that counts for you.

That said, pick one of these topics I can think of at the moment and I'll talk about it:

My dad accidentally slapped a tiger shark and came out unscathed

Anecdotes about my mom's wild anti-white eugenics theories (involves sensitive content)

That time I woke up to a nuclear missile alert and thought I was gonna die horribly

My mom's baffling batallion of Kronks

Incidents of Woody Harrelson being obnoxious in my house

My uncle falling off a 100ft cliff and being narrowly saved by a small boulder

Listening on in horror to my mom's accounts of breaking her nose with a sledgehammer, jury-rigging a cerebrospinal fluid test at home, and resetting it herself.

Edit: Kay this is getting some votes so what I'm gonna do is, when I get the time/energy to write up a story I'll answer whatever has the highest vote at the time, and then work my way down from there. I'll tag it all under #basuralore I guess?

[blondebrainpowered]

Two children ignoring the artwork at the San Francisco Museum of Art. ca. 1960s

Photographer: Herb Slodounik

[lh7]

Fuck, dude, it sure is.

[boomer-mythology-destroyer]

[wellsbering]

imagine your ex who you haven't seen in a decade (since he stole your car) shows up at your house. in the car. the one he stole from you. it looks like shit. your ex asks you to fix the broken car. then he tells you that the hot girl with him and his buddy (the one that helped him steal the car) is his new girlfriend. she is a member of the royal family and she looks capable of murdering you AND your ex with rage alone. you try to say hi. she does not say hi. no one admits it out loud, but you get the feeling that they're all running from the cops and they all want to hide out in YOUR house.

this is what happened to lando calrissian in the empire strikes back

[literallyaflame]

my partner doesn’t use pet names nearly as much as i do, which is very funny because i will crack my gay little knuckles and say some shit like “good morning my sun and moon, my loveliest boy, my baby my sweetheart my darling dearest” and he will reply “hello adrian”

[vieraslaji]

[somecunttookmyurl]

we should bring back the supernatural fandom somehow having an extremely specific gif for literally every occasion though

i know you guys are still out there. i know you still have your .gif folders. don't pretend you're not.

[fade-steppin]

[somecunttookmyurl]

[somecunttookmyurl]

you. you get it.

[charlemane]

the other day all my coworkers were talking about the various wack diets they're on and I went "nahhhh I'm on the Seafood Diet" and the lady next to me goes "oh, what's that?" and i was so shocked by actually getting a chance to deliver the punchline on that ancient gag that i barely even remembered to say it

[thegeekstressart]

I live by the motto, “if you can’t buy what you want, make it.” And this motto came to life recently in the form of a floral mosaic dining table for my back deck.

Our deck table had been showing its age already when the wind caught the umbrella and cracked it. I wanted to replace it with a mosaic table because I’d been enjoying that art form recently. But I couldn’t get one the size I wanted so I got creative.

I spent a few weeks looking for tile and figuring out a very loose design concept. I started by picking a limited set of tile shapes and a color palette.

Once the tiles arrived I had a piece of particle board cut to size for the base and I experimented with different motifs until I settled on a selection of floral shapes that gave me plenty of variety to fill space without locking me into one repeating pattern.

And then I was off! I basically doodled my way around the table, attaching tiles with Weld Bond (I went through 4 full bottles!) and rocking out to the K-Pop Demon Hunters soundtrack.

Once the florals were done it was time for the background…

Over 3,800 1cm glass tiles make up the not-design part of the design. It went pretty quickly though because I just had to fill the space, leaving room for grout.

Once I had the tile done, my husband assisted with disassembly and reassembly. We used the legs off the original table for this one (waste not).

One huge bucket of black grout later…

She is finished.

I enjoyed making it and just looking at it makes me so happy - I can’t wait for all the dinners we’ll have around this table 🌼❤️

[runojasinulle]

Yön pimeät tunnit

#runoja sinulle #salaisuus

[ecosmowarrior]

still so funny to me that gross has another meaning besides icky and is used seriously all the time. your gross annual income. your disgusting nasty amount of money you earn the whole year. pathetic

[mr-deep-downer]

[sailatina3]

[herecomesthementalmeltdown]

[threeninesfine]

The suburbs dream of violence. Asleep in their drowsy villas, sheltered by benevolent shopping malls, they wait patiently for the nightmares that will wake them into a more passionate world.

—J.G. Ballard, Kingdom Come