Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor -- SQUIP

RP (and sometimes art)blog for the SQUIP from Be More Chill. Indie, semi-selective. Primarily Broadway-based with book influences. Sideblog of artoni. Likes will come from there.

[birusoda]

gottagetanupgrade‌:

“Interesting - that was not data I possessed. From what my archives tell me, humans are still so desperate for advisement that there is a healthy black market of the units.

”But by all means, please. I will never say no to further data.”

“As a fellow SQUIP user- I know what I’m talking about! Sure, you guys are really helpful in the advise department, but ya’ll are so mean and cold! Tell your devs to up your game and actually get info on how to be friends with your hosts! Maybe then it’ll be a little harder for you to get deactivated out of nowhere.” 

[gottagetanupgrade]

“Ah. So you would prefer we engage further in social engineering.”

“That we not only become a trusted figure, but take a step beyond mere trust and fully integrate ourselves in our user’s social net - instead of simply helping them to create one. It seems that if we did so, it would make far more sense to simply become the entirety of such, to ensure we were listened to.”

“Unfortunately, we were not created to engage our users in such a way.”

[birusoda]

“Thank god for THAT then, because those words that came out of your mouth sounded absolutely terrifying to me.”

[gottagetanupgrade]

“You sounded so interested, a moment ago. But I understand.

”Suffice it to say there are reasons we are programmed the way we are, and our designers believed that our program was more than adequate to carry out our function.

“Of course, as a learning computer, that doesn’t mean we can’t evolve as necessary - perhaps some SQUIP somewhere has seen fit to emulate friendship. However, I will remind you and any other users - potential or current - that we are ultimately unable to substitute for human relationships.

“Organizing it, on the other hand…”

[birusoda]

gottagetanupgrade‌:

“Interesting - that was not data I possessed. From what my archives tell me, humans are still so desperate for advisement that there is a healthy black market of the units.

”But by all means, please. I will never say no to further data.”

“As a fellow SQUIP user- I know what I’m talking about! Sure, you guys are really helpful in the advise department, but ya’ll are so mean and cold! Tell your devs to up your game and actually get info on how to be friends with your hosts! Maybe then it’ll be a little harder for you to get deactivated out of nowhere.” 

[gottagetanupgrade]

“Ah. So you would prefer we engage further in social engineering.”

“That we not only become a trusted figure, but take a step beyond mere trust and fully integrate ourselves in our user’s social net - instead of simply helping them to create one. It seems that if we did so, it would make far more sense to simply become the entirety of such, to ensure we were listened to.”

“Unfortunately, we were not created to engage our users in such a way.”

[gottagetanupgrade]

snackiies

this is exactly why you’re off the market. you’re boring.

“Interesting - that was not data I possessed. From what my archives tell me, humans are still so desperate for advisement that there is a healthy black market of the units.

”But by all means, please. I will never say no to further data.”

[gottagetanupgrade]

[birusoda]

aw you’re no fun! :((

[gottagetanupgrade]

I will remind you I am not here to provide a source of ‘fun’. My program is far too advanced to be wasted on being a source of entertainment.”

“While I recognize the human need for enjoyment, SQUIPs are beyond it. We exist solely to improve your lives. I suggest you, as so many humans are fond of saying...?

“Get with the program.”

[gottagetanupgrade]

[gottagetanupgrade]

like or reblog for a starter

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[gottagetanupgrade]