I Don't Even Know?

Howdy.

[god-dammit-mason-blog]

Everyone is saying that the professor is grinding the Pokémon into candy, but consider the following:

• The professor frantically running around with assistants, inspecting hundreds of thousands of pidgeys a day, getting bitten and screeched at while they try to figure out if this pidgey has been tagged yet so they release them back to track their migration

• Panicked interns trying to scoop the ekanses back into their tank because theyre freaking out the rattatas

• Three caterpies climbed into a vent and evolved into metapods that are too far in to reach so six underpaid college students are trying to dismantle ductwork

• Theres a big door marked “KEEP OUT” because a dozen oddish evolved into a squad of Vileplumes and until they stop releasing stun spores the entire room is just off limits

• Hundreds of researchers running on red bull and determination trying to tag and examine all the Pokemon but having to turn off the machine every once in a while to the discontent of trainers who are all getting a “Sorry, the servers are currently down” message at LEAST twice a day

• “GPS not found” flashes while returning a big group and suddenly Florida has been gifted 6,000 mankeys right in the middle of Epcot

• Someone in the back room up to their waist in stale dog treats with a bunch of little stamps. They sigh deeply at how gullible Pokemon trainers are that they think these things actually do anything other than excite the Pokemon so much they evolve

• Actual science professor surrounded by chaos and interns and a budget just too small

[artbyalexis]

#i love this so so much#and my first thought was a picture of a manic looking jigglypuff behind a window#with the sign PROFESSOR JIGGLY IS LOOSE

[weirdmageddon]

best moments from classic spongebob

i’m watching spongebob again and im gonna take screencaps that should bring us back down memory lane

[weirdmageddon]

[weirdmageddon]

[weirdmageddon]

[weirdmageddon]

“twins”

[weirdmageddon]

[betterstayabsurd-deactivated202]

[bemusedlybespectacled]

Gomez gives out better relationship advice than like 90% of dudes.

[obstinate-nocturna]

Gomez Addams is a suave motherfucker who loves his wife more than his own life.

Everyone should want a Gomez. He’s p cool.

[breelandwalker]

Gomez and Morticia Addams actually have a very loving and extremely healthy relationship, both in the old TV show and in the more recent movies. They were also one of the first television couples to be shown to have an active (albeit offscreen) sex life. Their frank attitude towards sexuality was shocking in its’ time, but their relationship and their family dynamic is actually more functional and more…dare I say it…sane than most families portrayed on TV.

The comedy in the show came from the family’s “odd” lifestyle, rather than from infighting and petty bickering, or worse, as was common on other shows of the time, thinly veiled references to spousal abuse. They didn’t make fun of each other or act like their children were creatures from another world. Were they strange and outside of social norms? Yes. Were they united in creating a loving home and being good, supportive parents? Absolutely.

These two support and adore their children, care for an aging mother and an estranged brother, put family before everything, and they love each other, wholly, fiercely, without reserve. They are every bit as much in love after at least a decade of marriage as they were the day they met.

Relationship goals. LIFE goals.

[avotica]

Just remembered in the second movie when their third child became “normal” for a period and although they were shocked and didn’t know how to handle it, they didn’t mistreat the child or love it any less. They accepted the difference, even though it was hard for them. 

[drnerdlove]

Reblogged for truth.

[franklyunfabulous]

❤️❤️❤️

[endreal]

Posts about Gomez and Morticia Addams are almost always uplifting and I’m happy to have them on my dash, but I think my favorite bit about this conversation is what Gomez is actually saying to Fester.

It’s nobody’s surprise that many of the aesthetic and thematic elements of The Addams Family in its various incarnations are influenced by Gothic tradition (not goth, that mostly came later. And not Goth, that was much much much too early), and I think Gomez’s words are a dead bullseye in terms of Gothic mentality.

“Make her feel like she’s the most sublime creature on earth”

The sublime is a recurring theme throughout Gothic literature. Although the word (like “awesome”) has lost a lot of it’s original luster over the intervening decades, sublime doesn’t really mean elevated and lofty (or even heavenly) as it’s often used today, but rather something possessing the power and grandeur to induce awe and veneration in the mind of the beholder. Although less than divine, something sublime possessed a wildness and power that transcended human ability to control…or even to comprehend.

Sublime is standing at the edge of the Grand Canyon leaning as far as you dare over the railing and still not being able to see the canyon floor below. Sublime is warrior-queen Galadriel being tempted by the One Ring. Sublime is waking up in the middle of the night in the heart of a wild thunderstorm.

“Make her feel like she’s the most sublime creature on earth”

Gomez isn’t advising Fester to treat a woman he fancies like a princess, or even elevate her to pedestal of angelic nature (who’s idea was it to equate femininity with purity anyway? What a laughable and historically damaging idea. Shame on whatever dead (probably) white dudes promoted that!)

Gomez is advising Fester that if he truly loves a woman he must do everything he can to remind her of how she’s an untameable force of nature who’s grandeur brings him to his knees in awe and terror. Just like Morticia, for Gomez.

I’ll sign off with one of my most favorite quotes of all time, because it feels suddenly very relevant:

“When I find myself surrounded by so much beauty, I feel as if I am the eye of a hurricane.”

- -Sanjay Kulkarni

[kaijuno]

Observation: I have never broken a bone Hypothesis: I am boneless Data: I appear to have broken at least two bones in my foot slipping on the ice Conclusion: I have at least two bones. Strong evidence suggests the possibility of a third one. 

[kaijuno]

I’m an astrophysicist. 

[aqueroful]

[captainmwai]

Sony: Easy…. EASY….

Microsoft: Over a bit… now a little to the riiiight…

Nintendo: THREE HANDLES! NO! FOUR! MOTION DETECTOR STICK! A SCREEN A FUCKING SCREEN ON YOUR CONTROLLER

[jennyhoelzer-deactivated2016120]

[unpretty]

idea: selina kyle as a reverse archeologist. she steals from museums and private collections and returns things to the shrines and graves where they belong. she brings a clay jaguar to monte alban and now she can talk to cats. the whip is because she’s indiana jones. batman makes half-assed attempts to stop her but it’s not like she’s wrong so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ he’s got violent crimes to deal with, what does he care if she’s stealing back smuggled relics from rich assholes. he met that guy at a party once and he was a huge asshole so fuck him. steal his toupee, too. it’s probably endangered. ‘oh no catwoman is escaping and there’s nothing we can do. robin sit back down. there’s nothing we can do. she’s taking that statue back to egypt and we have no possible recourse against this terrible nonviolent crime with a single dick victim. i am definitely really mad about this. i’ll fight her later, when you’re sleeping or at a friend’s house or something. you’ll understand when you’re older.’

[unpretty]

so far this post has been reblogged by one single dude who was super offended by the idea of putting relics back where they came from, and a legitimately shocking number of hype archaeology majors who aspire to working primarily in repatriation.

(ps i ficced it a lil)

[cosmic-noir]

Okay so I’m really excited about this!

The dream of finding a nude underwear that isn’t terrible may finally be at my very fingertips!

They’re adorable and pretty affordable, selling at $18-$22.

Check them out at www.naja.co

(Shout out to Catalina Girald & Gina Rodriguez!)

[dynastylnoire]

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

[out-of-my-interest]

Clarence

[expulsi0n-deactivated20150723]

Proud of Cartoon Network for taking action so quickly.

[starwhal]

wait what happened

[kiltyascharged-deactivated20170]

The creator of Clarence sexually harassed a female storyboard artist. They kicked him to the curb and he’s no longer allowed in the studio 

[etoapia-deactivated20150703]

good job, CN

[cosmic-noir]

[prokopetz]

Consider:

Victorian England: 1867-1901

American Old West: 1803-1912

Meiji Restoration: 1868-1912

French privateering in the Gulf of Mexico: ended circa 1830

Conclusion: an adventuring party consisting of a Victorian gentleman thief, an Old West gunslinger, a disgraced former samurai, and an elderly French pirate is actually 100% historically plausible.

[rabbitrecycle-deactivated202206]

You play D&D? I seriously doubt that. I bet you don't even know what dice are.

Wait wait wait so you’re telling me

That these things aren’t elaborately shaped slightly mathematical candies?

I’m still gunna check

shit

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

AS WE ALL KNOW, WE WOMEN CANNOT UNDERSTAND COMPLICATED THINGS LIKE DICE

ONLY MANLY MEN KNOW WHAT DICE ARE

[deducecanoe-deactivated20161213]

SOME OF THEM HAVE AS MANY AS TWENTY SIDES. HOW CAN WE UNDERSTAND TWENTY SIDES?

[sublimesublemon]

twenty sides and not one single one is a stove or ironing board

[adrenalain]

This is amazing

[rabbitrecycle-deactivated202206]

The fact that this post is still alive and kicking is hysterical

[clockworkpearlgirl]

D&D? What strange acronym is this? Dishes & Dicks? Because us women only know how to do those.

[kangamommy-deactivated20181203]

I’m reblogging not just because I’ve been playing D&D since the 70s but mostly for the Dishes & Dicks comment.  Because that’s fucking priceless.

[charlesoberonn]

There’s no faster way to make your child lose interest in connecting with you than dismissing and making fun of the things that are important to them.

[ref4theartists]

[meeshay]

slay me

[mendel]

signs, easy to start, surprisingly difficult to finish

[megandrawsathing]

Always Reblog yard sard.

[masterbeyda]

How hard could it be?

[explosiondragon]

how could you possibly ignore the most important one?

[comparativelysuperlative]

I never leave the house without my collection of magic items: KEYS—allow walking through walls at predefined locations.

GLASSES— remove one disability.

WALLET—can be converted into practically anything, up to a finite total monetary value.

PANTS—vastly decrease risk of getting arrested.

[hybridzizi]

SHOES–allow walking over surfaces which are too hot or rough.

[somethingsomethinginsertthought]

BOOK-allows temporary travel to alternate reality

[hybridzizi]

PURSE–increases the number of items that can be carried at once.

[pistachi0n-deactivated20170826]

COAT-allow survival at below freezing temperatures.

[littleblueartist]

COFFEE- gives temporary stamina and perception increase

[mrs-flood]

HEADPHONES- decreases possibility of unwanted interactions.

[ambulatoryhoodie]

PHONE- allows fast travel and communication with out of range party members.

[mythsweaver]

BUS PASS- unlocks new location

[holyrights-deactivated20211021]

FISTS- to beat up your nerdy asses

[truckhole-deactivated20181203]

i complimented an old lady customer’s little round glasses and she said “why thank you! someone told me they had a ‘steampunk look’. i haven’t been called a punk in a long time, much less a steamy one!” i’m flatlining

[just-shower-thoughts]

Based on genital structure men should really be the ones wearing skirts and women should be wearing pants.

[scribblerextraordinaire]

The Scots were right all along

[zahracusdottir]

The Scots did it to hide more knives on their bodies.

[bckyrdfuneral]

the Scots were right all along