[bellasredchevy]

bella drinking blood for the first time in breaking dawn through a styrofoam cup and a plastic straw

[mwagneto]

[folklorestv]

Rocketman (2019) dir. Dexter Fletcher

[worldssmallestgus]

No hair dye strand test we dye like men

[daishannigans]

Kingsman Iconography in ‘The King’s Man’ (2020) dir. Matthew Vaughn

[penroseparticle]

So I just went with my buddy while he got a rib tattoo, and they hurt like a lot, so he’s over there grimacing and being a huge manbaby so I just reach over and grab his hand so he can squeeze it because I’m a good person who helps others

And he’s clinging to my hand like it’s a life preserver and I’m being me and talking about nonsense like Grimace from the McDonalds commercials and how R2D2 is always ready to throw hands, and whatever, and the artist keeps glancing over at me and I’m like do your tattoo bro I’ve got my buddy handled

But then I realize he’s like, looking over because he can’t tell if he’s seeing something or not, and I glance down and I see my rainbow scalemail bracelet, and how I’m talking to my buddy all fondly and I’m like stroking his arm like he’s a wounded animal, and right as it clicks in my head the tattoo artist asks in his most nonchalant voice possible, like intentionally bland, I’m just talking about the weather haha what do you mean voice:

“So, are you guys close?”

And my gay ass is over to the side internally screaming because yeah, I am gay, but like this is just me being a good bro and my buddy is COMPLETELY OBLVIOUS TO WHAT IS HAPPENING BECAUSE HE’S A GARBAGE STRAIGHT PERSON AND HE SAYS

“Yeah of course, that’s why I asked him to come”

SO NOW THE TATTOO ARTIST THINKS HE’S RIGHT AND HE HAS A GAY COUPLE GETTING A TATTOO AND MY BUDDY HAS NO IDEA AND I’M AWKWARDLY SITTING HERE LIKE SHOULD I STOP HOLDING HIS HAND??? SHOULD I CORRECT THIS TATTOO ARTIST??? SHOULD I LET MY BUDDY KNOW??? MY GAY ASS DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE BEING INCORRECTLY ACCUSED OF BEING GAY, WHAT DO YOU DO

So that tattoo artist is like “Cool man, that’s great. Good for you.”

So then my buddy is like can I get some water, and the guy comes back with one bottle of water and my buddy takes a drink and then hands it to me, and I’m like obviously he has to lay down and needs me to hold his water so I just hold it in my hand, but turns out he was offering me water, so he turns to me and is like Colton, drink some water, and I take a drink and my garbage lizard brain is like “You’re drink sharing in front of the tattoo artist, now he KNOWS he’s right”

So we’re talking about tattoos with the artist and I mention that I’m getting a tattoo in September and my buddy is like “Yeah I’m gonna go and hold HIS hand for that one haha” and the tattoo artist FUCKING SAYS “I mean, I should hope so”

I MEAN, I SHOULD HOPE SO

I MEAN, I SHOULD HOPE SO

AND NO ONE ACTUALLY BROUGHT IT UP. I KNEW WHAT THE TATTOO ARTIST WAS THINKING BUT DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING TO CORRECT HIM. NOW WHEN MY BUDDY GOES BACK AND GETS HIS NEXT TATTOO IN THE FUTURE AND I’M NOT THERE HE’S GOING TO GO “OH WHERE’S YOUR BOYFRIEND”

[somewhereisaplacethatziamknow-d]

People don’t care though, do they?  Anyway, I discovered records…and rock ‘n roll.

[sirfrogsworth]

(Audio recommended.)

So inspirational. 

[heypaulookitthis]

This took forever to load and it did not disappoint.

[onlytwitterpics]

[glacierlakes]

go cozy aaaaaaaaahhhh go sleepy aaaaaahhhhhh

[midnightmazes-deactivated202605]

“stop falling in love with taron egerton”

[jim-kirk]

Rocketman (2019) dir. Dexter Fletcher

[eowyndy]

Turns out the only music I’ll be listening to for the rest of my life is the Rocketman soundtrack. So there’s that.

[johnnyjoestarrelatable]

do you ever just know the answer to a trivia question and have no idea where the knowledge came from

[warp-topaz]

[somecutething]

[im-inlovewithmycar]

Last night as I was driving home in the middle of a tornado warning, with thunder and lighting all around me, my car literally shaking in the wind, Bohemian Rhapsody blasting out of my one working speaker, while wearing one shoe, I realized that if this is how I die, it’s how I want to go.

[o-holynight]

Thunderbolts and lightning. Very very frightening.

[catchymemes]

[anime-penis]

i, and i can’t emphasize this enough, would literally die for merlin