Daisies thrive in adversity

Isabella | 19 | Student | She/Her | Feminist | My mental and physical journey to find myself again after a difficult history. Resources, activism, self love, recipes, books, and art.

[growingisabezza]

My body is an instrument, not an ornament

This talk by the founder of Redefining Beauty was eye opening. An inspirational talk, full of powerful messages about self acceptence. Empowering us to be autonomous in our bodies.

Anyone and everyone who engages with body image rituals (such as hiding or being embarrased by your powerful perfect self), I encourage you to watch this video. You are worthy.

(And - in my opinion - life is too short. Fill your mind with the things and people that matter instead.)

[growingisabezza]

Welcome to October

I have not been very active on social media this past month, including with my blog here.

In fact, I had made the intention to use technology and social media in a more mindful manner because I am beginning the journey of holding myself accountable. I had been using technology to expose myself to content which does not serve me, and it was my intention this month to find productive and kind ways to interact with my phone. This has helped me be present in social situations and become less stressed about timings around food and tasks.

I have cultivated a deeper connection with myself throughout September. I intend to step into Autumn with an open mind and remove my expectations. I choose not to predetermine the outcome of everything I do and accept that everything which happens serves a purpose.

This mindset is difficult to trust and maintain, and I have struggled and faltered in the past few weeks. However, I am proud of myself for considering my wellbeing more and prioritizing my needs. I have rested when I have been unwell, I have laughed deeper, I am grateful for myself.

As we move into October, I invite you to be mindful of the beautiful season and everything it brings. I have attached my playlist for walks in the rain should you want to share that experience with me.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2HqTk3TsH7rQnNEGsOidbK?si=6528e89f619c4df2

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

somewhere in the world

a mother is singing her baby a lullaby for the first time, a shelter cat is going home with an excited family, a kid is starting the first pages of what will be their favorite book series, a couple in a long engagement is finally having their wedding, a gardener is stepping outside to see their produce flourishing and almost ready to be picked, a father is becoming a grandfather eager to hold his new little love, a teenager is putting the keys into their first car, someone is moving on from a break up and walking past a place they used to go with their ex without feeling an ache, a patient is taking their first steps forward after a long surgery, a child is getting all giddy with anticipation for their birthday party

because life all around us is beautiful even though their is chaos and sorrow that can often overshadow it.

[mynotheroacademia]

how to become a better you everyday :

be more observant. Notice everything that surrounds you. The world is full of examples, ideas, words, wisdom, mistakes and experiences.

Collect ideas. Ideas and thoughts tend to evaporate from your mind too fast. Try to capture them before it is too late, Ideally, write down or record every single one as a voice memo

Become more intuitive, trust yourself and accept your mistakes. Progress isn't linear but you will always learn something from your intuition.

Be kind to people, radiate the energy you want to receive.

Communicate, with your partner, your friends, family, coworkers. Every little thing, even if you are scared people would judge you.

[artist-monet]

The Japanese Bridge, 1899, Claude Monet

https://www.wikiart.org/en/claude-monet/the-japanese-bridge

[growingisabezza]

26/09/2021

Lazy Sunday coffee. Planning my week after a walk in the sunshine and a charity shop haul.

[growingisabezza]

Accepting Change

I feel good. This week I have undergone some very large changes in my life. I have experienced new things, moved house, been faced with new dangers, and explored totally new places.

I admit, I have felt threatened. I have felt alone, and I have felt scared. Those feelings are valid. Further, those feelings prove how strong I am.

I am proud of myself at the end of this week. There have been many times of upset, where I did not think I would be able to say it has been a good week, but it really, really, has.

I was told on Monday that the physical sensations of excitement and nerves are exactly the same. We feel butterflies, perhaps we shake, perhaps we run on adrenaline, perhaps we feel nauseous. "Channel nervousness into the other - excitement!" I did not realise how much I had listened to that message until I reflected on my behaviour tonight.

I felt incredibly nervous living and exploring in new parts of a city, especially after living in the countryside for most of my life. I was also excited. The sensations are the same. Once I had made the excitement paramount in my mind, my desire and my happiness to welcome newness and change excelled. I had the best first night in my new place, despite all the difficulty getting there and the fear of change.

Change will always happen. As difficult as it may sound - embrace it. Accept change. The unknown is scary, and it is also exciting. Anything could happen. Anything could happen.

[growingisabezza]

My Favourite Sourdough Toppings

Moroccan: (spicy, fruity, and fresh)

I made this from leftovers in my fridge! I leave for university tomorrow and didn't want to do a whole shop. It turned out incredibly fresh and delicious. The flavours worked perfectly together.

You will need:

Sourdough bread

Moroccan hummus

Frozen spinach

Dried prunes

Falafel (I used coconut and chickpea bites)

Dried prunes

Salt and pepper

Greek: (Colourful, warm, and cheesy)

This was put together to finish off my feta cheese and it was wonderful for a summer lunch/snack! It reminds me of Greek pizza toppings. You could even add balsamic vinegar for a sweeter taste. You will need:

Sourdough bread

Frozen spinach

Red onion

Oil

Feta cheese

Salt and pepper

[growingisabezza]

Book Review: The Essex Serpent - Sarah Perry

This novel has a captivating atmosphere and is a thrilling historical mystery.

The construction of 19th century English language is beautiful, and Perry explores viewpoint through her narrative construction in a perceptive manner. The prose leaps between the inner-most desires of a religious man, to the actions of a self-propelled independent female, creating an elaborate web of characters, relationships, and thoughts.

Voices of the socialist woman, the developmentally impaired child, and the love-torn genius, are all exposed in this novel with no consistent narrator.

I really enjoyed the lyrical language. Religion, science, and madness intertwine upon each character, as each learns more about where they live and what they believe in.

The Essex Serpent is a mysterious identity to the end and serves to challenge all morals.

This book spoke to me due to the depth of all characters. The most invisible voice, a woman never seen without her husband in the narrative, speaks:

"You told me once you forget you are a woman, and I understand it now - you think to be a woman is to be weak - you think ours is a sisterhood of suffering! Perhaps so, but doesn't it take greater strength to walk a mile in pain than seven miles in none? You are a woman, and must begin to live like one. By which I mean: have courage."

My heart and soul sung at that quote, and read it again and again.

I have a passion for history, and this mysterious, gory, historical fantasy world described settings based on British history realism which definitely intrigued me.

[growingisabezza]

afternoon study session 21/09/21

Be open to change and appreciate the changes you have made. You probably are not where you planned to be a few years ago, and you still have so many wonderful things to be grateful for.

[growingisabezza]

Practicing Mindfulness

I have been practicing mindfulness using apps such as Headspace, and within my yoga practices.

Headspace teaches to increase focus and calmness. One practice is mindfully recognising yourself on walks - how your arms hang at your sides, how your feet connect to the ground, how you move. It actually helped me notice more of the beauty in what is around me, like the blue view in this picture.

Every morning I start the day with a yoga practice. Yoga has been particularly helpful on my mindfulness journey as well as freeing myself from the habit of perfectionism. Frankly, I cannot master every position. Instead, I work with my body to find what feels comfortable, to rest when my body needs, and push when my body feels strong.

These practices of mindfulness have genuinely helped me feel whole within my body.

Often the challenge is not recognising how we feel, but being able to accept how we feel and acknowledge distress without demanding to fix it. The challenge is to be mindful and kind to yourself. Appreciate when things go wrong. You are learning.

[growingisabezza]

Quotes from my journal in ED recovery that are not about food:

"My body is my home."

"I respect my body."

"I choose to focus on what I actually care for: writing, art, women, languages."

"I can approach the things which make me anxious from a calmer, nourished, open-minded perspective."

"My body is smarter than my mind. It is not manipulated, categorised, and oppressed by society. It has wisdom for survival."

"The sights and sounds of the rain make me feel content"

"I am fascinated by this Netflix show."

"I choose to appreciate however much or little life presents to me today."

"I can be happy in this moment."

"I am working hard towards recovery and I will earn a free, full, wonderful, life."

Reading back through my journal and reflecting on the highs and lows was really moving. Specifically, these quotes remind me that life is more than numbers and anxiety and food. In those moments I felt free from an ED and could see my life shining through. I am motivated to keep going.

If you are in ED or any mental health recovery, journalling has really helped me reflect on good and bad. It helps to recognise my triggers, anchor me, and remind me of bright moments. I recommend it.

[growingisabezza]

Summer Roasted Vegetable Jumble

I whipped up this beautiful bowl after a long morning out with my Dad. This kind of creativity causes a lot of anxiety in recovery - it really is worth the taste, colour, fun, and pride. This was super refreshing on a hot day too!

You will need:

1 beetroot

1 sweet pepper

A handful of cherry tomatoes

1 portion of couscous (prepared packet or fresh from the fridge!)

30g feta cheese

A drizzle of balsamic vinegar

Oil

Simply chop up your vegetables, drizzle them in olive oil, season with salt and pepper, and then roast for 25 minutes at 200 degrees. Meanwhile, plate the cold couscous and crumble the feta. Mix it all together and top with balsamic. Delicious!

[surqrised]

“Stop telling yourself that the grass is greener on the other side, because it’s not. It is greener where you water it. So take control of your life and start watering your own pastures and grow your own greener.”

— knowanoah

[growingisabezza]

Autumn Flavours

Stepping into September can be overwhelming. The school schedules, the reading lists, moving house, changing your wardrobe.

September is also beautiful. The colours change with the season. Food becomes warmth and comfort.

This morning I started with a book, a caramel coffee, a blanket, and apple crumble baked oats. The feelings and flavours of autumn. I invite you to find those flavours in your life today. Embrace this time of change, rather than feeling overwhelmed by it.

How to make Apple Crumble Baked Oats:

1/2 cup oats

1/2 cup milk (I used soya!)

An apple

1 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp vanilla extract

Mix everything together in an oven-proof dish, leave in the fridge overnight. Bake for 20-25 minutes for a fresh cake-like breakfast!

[romantic-musings]

artist Nathalie Lete painted her house full of flowers during quarantine

[growingisabezza]

Nutella Sticky Oats

You will need:

1/2 cup of oats

1/2 cup of milk

1 tbsp flax or chia seed

1 tsp vanilla extract

1 tbsp Nutella

Mix everything together in a mug or bowl and leave in the fridge overnight.

Microwave in the morning for 2 minutes and stir halfway... Enjoy!