"why are you so stupid and gay?" - anon, 2016

lucas (24) he/him, returning to tumblr from twitter 💀 writing blog: https://open-ike.tumblr.com/

[sproutlett]

if you’re not paying attention to trees and how they sway in the wind then what are you even doing

[minovskyy]

becoming homophobic because when two characters in a scene have the same pronouns you have to say their names one william times

[minovskyy]

finally some good advice on this post

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

[rninor-blog]

“bend over” “bend what? over”

[striderofthen0rth]

I hate this place

[ceruleanheaven]

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

[hahaimdrowning]

Elizabeth Kirkman Fitzhugh, Militant Mary

November 13, 1914

[adelphicoracle]

I had never heard of this character before, but it really was published over a hundred years ago. Here’s a comics blog talking about her, and a couple more gems:

Obscurity of the Day: Militant Mary

It's hard to believe that this blog has been running over a dozen years now, and I am just now getting around to mak

[latinexplains]

After 20 painstaking years of research, Eva Ramon Gallegos, a Mexican scientist has finally developed a cure to eliminate 100 percent human papillomavirus and prevent the spread of cervical cancer among women. (x) (x) (x) Y’all they cured HPV

Yet Trump’s America wouldn’t want you to hear about this nor help it go mainstream

[yanimodowey]

🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

[dyslexic-pretzel]

YO THIS IS ACTUALLY VERY FUCKING IMPORTANT OH MY GOD

[weenie-kun]

[parkchanwoohoo]

The last panel contains more emotion than anything you could find in a museum

[bigaudiodynamitetheglobe]

eye contact feels so like.. private and intimate … u can’t expect me to look u in the eyes.. how invasive…. it’s none of ur business what’s in my eyes

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[saltrat88]

[tomroughneck]

Meanwhile in Russia

[inzertbreaks]

annyi.

[marcommarco]

gente decisa

[captain-price-official]

The bigger vehicle has right of way.

[enrique262]

Russians cannot into chill.

[ravldazle]

This is what I call a satisfying video

[knighterrante]

@rokirovka blease tell me what these poor benighted motherfuckers are saying

[kittoforos]

@theminism tbf speakers 1 and 2 seem like pretty reasonable people… i can’t really translate much of what the benighted motherfuckers involved are saying since they’re farther away (and swearing is hard to translate) but here goes nothing lmao just for you

speaker 1: What, they can’t drive out of each other’s way?

speaker 2: It looks like they can’t drive out of each other’s way. There’s not enough space. And they’re fighting.

speaker 1: They should have just pulled off and let the excavator go first.

speaker 2 [interrupting]: Of course.

speaker 1: What the heck are they doing over there

speaker 2: What the heck

speaker 1: Woah woah what the heck okay wow

speaker 2: What the hell [gets out of car] Hey, hey guys! What the f[this is where the beep comes in] are you doing!

speaker 3: Don’t take pictures!

speaker 2: I’m filming!

speakers 3 and 4: [inaudible] Don’t take pictures! Put the phone away!

speaker 2: Guys, calm down!

[the reckoning arrives]

speakers 3 and 4: [general yelling] No no no! f[beep]! Wow! Wow! [yelling continues inaudibly]

speaker 2: Wow guys! [laughs] Fuck, dudes! Wow you messed up! [laughs] now that, man, is a fuck up! Motherf[beep]! Get ‘em!

[hroethvitnir]

Oh man, thank you so much for the translation.

[silentwalrus1]

i had a thought today like man, my ancestors would probably not approve very much of me being such an extravagant glutton, but then i was like wtf are u kidding. those dumbasses didn’t live on a fuckin potato ass diet for no minimalism. they didn’t do what they did, whatever the fuck it was, for me NOT to fucking eat my bodyweight in sashimi!!! they would be fucking ecstatic to see me making the most of my opportunities for plenty. they would be fucking cheering me on. every lice-covered cossack and illiterate serf and three-toothed yak herder in my lineage is with me in this restaurant, and they are going absolutely apeshit watching me try to fit an entire samosa in my mouth

[silentwalrus1]

i love this idea that the ancestors are following modern people around like a rappers yes-man as we eat food #‘fucking superb you funky little descendant’

me, standing in front of the burger king counter like the blithering hunger gibbon i am: i’ll have… uhhh… double whopper with fries. thank you. large please

the 500 mongolian tatar and polish jew ghosts behind me: [ERUPT INTO WILD SCREAMING AND HIGH FIVES] 

[pochowek]

can you believe there is a painting of cossacks going hogwild out there that fits this situation perfectly

[jaythenerdkid-official]

american cop shows: he’s an [x]! she’s a [completely unrelated and incompatible y]! they fight crime! (and eventually make out, if the fans think they’re hot together!)

british cop shows: detective inspector john smith returns to work after a year spent fighting his debilitating mental illness to head up a special task force dedicated to tracking down terrifying monsters. amidst the breakdown of his marriage and the unsolved mystery of his murdered child, john races against the clock to uncover corruption in his department before it takes down the task force. at least five people will die per episode.

[biggaybunny]

Early video game designer: Okay, we’re just about done with this level

Video game designer’s manager: Great! Did you figure out what to put at the end?

designer: Yeah, we put this tough, nasty, mean, ugly monster that the player has to beat. We made sure killing the monster feels as rewarding as possible.

manager: Cool! So what’s it called?

designer: The boss.

manager:

manager: why’s it called that

[striders]

Hey is the build a bear employee supposed to force us to jump up and down or are we getting hazed

[girl-in-the-hitops]

as a build-a-bear employee it is my honor to happily inform you that we get to make everyone do whatever the fuck we want during a heart ceremony. jump to get that heart beating. rub that heart to your knees so your furry friend always needs you. rub it to your toes so it’s totally awesome! shake it up so it’s got enough energy to hang out with you all day! close your eyes, make a wish, and give it a kiss you helpless motherfucker

[roxilalonde-deactivated20251105]

self care is watching those all gameplay & cutscenes videogame compilations  on youtube in order to simulate the experience of playing games you dont have the money for

[roxilalonde-deactivated20251105]

me, sitting down to watch 6-8 full hours of fun content while someone infinitely better than me at videogames handles all the hard parts:

[bestviralposts]

INCREDIBLE PHOTO <3

link below to see:

http://sh-meet.bigpixel.cn/?from=groupmessage&isappinstalled=0&fbclid=IwAR1CWHqrxwZ1OUHem0CjjLrTBDH2j2cS4zISRo_2a6coC-A_YkFRr6QzMls

credit to: ketul

[warmwate-r]

Zoomed in and found this gem

[roseverdict]

I think I found someone who knows about the camera

Hello there, observant person!

[thyrell]

uh oh

[all-hail-mono-onion]

i encourage you guys to click the link it’s hella rad

bonus:

special protected fire hydrant

[shrimpathy-for-the-rogue]

Bucket

[tadpoledancer]

Hello darkness my old friend

[fuckyahumor]

damnnnnn 

[cdpdoodler]

enemy spotted

[lubricates]

damn this had like 3k notes yesterday

[threebigolsausages-deactivated2]

engineer 1: we need a name for the front of the plane where the pilots sit

engineer 2: dick hole

engineer 1: hmm…almost