you're something to remember

[yvetteyou-deactivated20211204]

[alisonzai]

*gently buries my face into a very soft dog*

[hallllla-blog]

me: *does something stupid* gdo fukcign that was so embarrassing i hope no one knows i did that

me: *texts all my friends* hey do u wanna hear about this stupid thing i just did

[fingerblaster116-deactivated201]

I am drunk on my front porch and I think a lizard went into my shirt but whatever man have fun in there

[fingerblaster116-deactivated201]

when did I post this

[dumbghosties]

Cool fact about thick thighs:

Free hand warmer always

[gearhead4783-deactivated2015081]

Or ear warmers

[ilovepeppers-deactivated2019122]

[strongbowdarkfruit]

it’s your wedding day, everything is going well, you’re married, the best day of your life. a projector is being turned on in your peripherals, you had expected some kind of embarrassing montage of photos, you don’t really care, the lights dim, people sit down. your blog flickers into focus. 

[unseasoned-aldente-pasta]

#I didn’t invite satan to my wedding is this the punishment

[bismuth-relatable-deactivated20]

*finds a bottle on the beach* *opens it* *bottle starts screaming* what the fuck

[worm]

*screams into a bottle & releases it to sea*

[igglooaustralia]

[tastefullyoffensive]

[dagashi-deactivated20160725]

I am trying this yesterday 

[kellymccaleb]

[hallllla-blog]

my brain: hey u should bite ur fingers off

me: i do not want to do that

my brain: someone's gotta do it

me: literally no one has to do it

my brain: someone's gotta do it

[nuevayor]

me @ my hands: stop shaking so much bitch

hands @ me: fuck you its anxiety’s fault

anxiety @ hands: bitchass snitch

[m-o-o-n-l-i-q-h-t-deactivated20]

Damaged people are dangerous. They know how to make hell feel like home.

(via o-scurita)

[tinotonatini]

[a-tiny-bee]

if you don’t think Kim Possible’s school sign was the best then you need to get out of my face.