I have the biggest dick in 40 square miles

if i look back, i am lost
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
AnasAbdin
Today's Document
hello vonnie

roma★
Misplaced Lens Cap

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$LAYYYTER
Sade Olutola

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Three Goblin Art
ojovivo
KIROKAZE
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Stranger Things

Discoholic 🪩

Andulka
art blog(derogatory)

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@hamletsbae
I have the biggest dick in 40 square miles
you only get this achievement if you were here and posting the entire time
yeah babe you look like a vampire yes you look undead i promise love can we go now
honestly i’ve stopped caring if media is good. all that matters is that Me, The Most Important Person, is having a good time.
RIP to everyone killed by the gods for their hubris but im different. and better. maybe even better than the gods
a CEO walks into his office “any messages?” he asks his assistant “two anons want to know who tom petty is and one just says ‘post your ballsack’” “got it. check my dashboard” “that skeleton gif you like is back again” he rubs his chin pensively “mm. reblog that”
this is what i imagine david karp does with his time considering that tumblr hasn’t been improved for about three odd years
So they agree, commuting hours are work hours
If anybody’s employer starts talking like this make them pay you for your commute lol
“alright then, by my calculations you owe me in commute back pay about--”
“wait wait wait”
would u guys still like me if i looked like this
im trying not to cry rn
Imagine being the English teacher in new moon calling Edward out for not paying attention, probably just trying to stop his two weirdest students from canoodling during the movie and then this guy just starts. Reciting Shakespeare from memory? I would quit my job. That would be too much for me.
mob psycho 100 walked so jujutsu kaisen could run 😤
God works hard but Lil Nas X works harder
Treat spiders the way you want to be treated
Killed without hesitation
The weird “Lightman” character, who (unfortunately) was cut from RETURN OF THE JEDI (1983).
Dude I love this guy wtf
Do yourself a favor and start viewing social media as as reality TV. It’s all scripted, planned, and edited. Also there’s a high chance all those nice things you’re seeing are just props they don’t actually own.
MOUSE ARMOUR
mouse anemone
Mouse condo, previously owned by Venus Williams, desirable neighborhood, available immediately.
That's so cute 😭😭
cinematic parallels: tumblr somehow becoming one of the most bearable social media platforms in 2020/2021, and that speed skater who made it to the olympics because everyone else fell over
tumblr, doing the bare minimum of keeping posts chronological and not forcing targeted ads down our throats 24/7:
olaf is the prime example of a genuinely bad character who did a few good deeds in his life and doesnt get redeemed because of it. the baudelaires did not mourn for him. they buried him because to them, they felt thats what they should do. they still hated him. count olafs ending is not an excuse to crown him your “uwu precious angel who was misunderstood.” he is a bad person who had a few good moments. dont romanticize his abuse of the baudelaires just because he carried kit to the island.
I think they buried him because watching a corpse decompose is traumatizing and unhygienic. Plus it would not smell good at all.
Burying him was more their gift to themselves than any commentary on his worth as a character.
damn wtf happened in frozen 2