HarveyWabbit-Writings

Please read my pinned post before following This is a Writing blog about whatever the hell I'm obsessed with!

[harveywritings92]

Yo, it’s Harvey.

Yo, it’s Harvey.

I’m 33 years old, I’m autistic, a second gen Canadian, I’m Pan/demi. And my pronouns are She/they.

----------------------------------------------- Do NOT interact with my blog if you support: INCEST, TERFS, MAPS(aka: pedos) OR ZOOS. Also stay away if you support A.I. “Art” and “Writing” I will block you.

MY RULES: This writing blog is for my more mature and darker content (but no smut), for GN! Readers, Fem readers and Ocs whatever I’m fixated on.

I don’t really take requests anymore unless it’s a quote submission. I used to, but it got way too overwhelming for me and I got burnt out.

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Regarding my older fics they can be found on my AO3 account  or my Wattpad and  Squidgeworld account.

For any NSFW stories that I write and reblogged can be found here: Harveyficrebolgs29 18+ USERS ONLY MINORS STAY OUT!! 🔞

The only fics that are gonna be posted here are sfw form now on.

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ALSO: Regarding my incorrect quotes, (Because I’ve been getting a lot of DMs about it.) It’s totally fine for you guys to make comics based on them. if you want to that is, no need to ask! Go nuts, just remember to tag me.

[harveywritings92]

{Ghost shows up from his leave with his wrist in a cast, he won’t say how he hurt it that is until he and Soap are alone.]

Ghost, to soap: Do you really want know how I actually hurt my wrist?

Soap: Yes.

Ghost: I was hula hooping. Ivy signed me up for a class for fitness and for fun.

{Ghost shows Soap his phone with pictures for proof.]

Soap, looks at the pics in amazement: Oh my God.

Ghost: I’ve mastered all the moves. The pizza toss, the tornado, the scorpion, the oopsie doodle.

Soap: Why are you telling me this?

Ghost: Because no-one… will ever believe you.

Soap: Huh?

[Ghost deletes the pictures]

Soap: No, no!

[Ghost chuckles menacingly and makes his way back to his office.]

Soap, through his teeth: You sick son of a bitch…

[harveybwabbit92]

I just gave my dad his Father's day gift early 'cos I thought it was today! 😭😐

[harveywritings92]

Charlie: How did my life come to this?

Grady: Whaddya mean?

Charlie, leaning on her desk: I'm 32 and work as a toilet inspector...with criminal record to boot!

Grady: No...32 with no criminal record, remember? the upper management said they'd drop the charges if you took your sentence and worked off the damages.

Charlie: 84 years... that's how long it's gonna take to work off that debt, 84 years; I'll be dead before then!

Grady: No you won't! Remember? The other requirement of the deal? You had to consent to having experimental nanites injected into your body; you're practically ageless!

Charlie, breaks down sobbing: Oh, I never should've went looking for my father! I should've stayed home ran the flower shop with grandma!

Grady: I'm not sure what daddy issues have to do with it. But..uh, *Hands Charlie a bottle* Here's some water get back to work.

[harveybwabbit92]

Riley: Hi, how are ya today? What can I do for ya?

Customer: Do you do any detailing here?

Riley: Yes, I do vehicle cosmetics and details are ye gearin' for a new look?

Customer: No, I'm not looking for anything fancy, I just really need to get my car sodomized today.

Riley she stares at them:

Riley: ...I'm sorry, ye need what?

Customer: Oh, Are you not offering that, do you know anyone who will?

Edo: *walks in* What's up?

Customer, looks at Edo: Do you know a good sodomizers? It’s been ages since I had it done.

Edo: ... *walks out*

Customer: Y'know, I can just Sodomize it myself, do you sell any coat safe car wax?

Riley: Excuse me...Are ya tryin' to say simonize?

[Customer goes quiet for a second before realizing what they had been saying, their face turns several shades of red and purple before running out of the lobby area mortified, Riley saw their car peeling out of the parking lot a few seconds later.]

[harveywritings92]

[when they were kids and before Gorgon! reader and Robert got together. They're in Robert's basement playing Simpson's Hit n' run.]

Young! Robert: I think I might be Bi.

S/o: Which one? Bisexual? Bilingual? Bipolar?

Robert:....Yes.

[harveywritings92]

[Teen! Robert and Gorgon! Reader are talking while throwing water balloons full of paint at a random house.]

Robert: Jeez, have the days always been this slow?I remember them going by way faster.

R/n: Probably 'cos we don't have any school today...

Robert: I hope they clean up all those stink bugs Kevin accidentally released into the classroom, half-days suck.

[Just then a person comes outside and looks at their paint splattered house then at Robert and R/n pissed off.]

Rando: You little teenage fricks are the ones throwin' paint at my house?!

Robert and R/n, thought the house was abandoned: Ah...

Rando: Let's see how you bloody like it?!

[They go inside for a tick then reemerges with a paintball machine gun in hand and starts firing.]

Robert: Oh crap! {He and R/n runaway)

[R/n suddenly yelps in pain and starts hobbling.]

R/n: OW! Fuck! They got me in the ass!

[Robert starts laughs at his friend's misfortune.]

R/n, holding their left butt cheek: No, man, this really fricking hurts!

[harveybwabbit92]

Another Tumblr staff Scam account enters the fray... they at me in a mention claiming there was "suspicious activity" on my account and that I've been switch to lurker mode, and to fixit I should click a mystery link to verify my account, 🙄 it's an obvious scam, if this account mentions or messages you report and block them.

[harveywritings92]

[An angry Flambae is chasing down Waterboy after he accidentally destroyed Flambae's lunch, only for the pyromancer to trip on a puddle and land on Waterboy in a very compromising position, just as Invisigal walked in on them.]

Invisigal: Gah! what the hell?! Seriously? You guys too?!

Waterboy: Huh?

Invisigal: God what is with me walking in on people fucking today?!

Flambae:...what?

Invisigal: First Golem and his girl, then Sonar and his wife! I...is there something in the coffee?

Flambae, jumps away from Waterboy: Wait, we're not fucking, I just slipped!

Invisigal: Right, and I'm Queen of Canada!...Y'know what? Screw this! I'm gonna find Robert and Blazer and see if they wanna threesome in the break room.

[harveywritings92]

R/n: Uhh… I'm a little worried about your dispatcher, Robert?. Is he okay?

Golem: Caffeine Robby? Oh yeah, he’s fine.

R/n: But he seems, a bit…

Sonar: He has more coffee in a day than any of us do in a week. Is it healthy? Nah. Has he not slept since April? Probably. Does he have the best productivity out of all the dispatchers here? Absolutely.

R/n: Well… okay then? Does he ever talk...or blink?

Invisigal: Only if he really doesn’t like you.

[harveywritings92]

[Sonar walks up to Golem's house when he hears Golem moaning and R/n giggling through the front door, it almost sounded like they were... No they couldn't be! ...Or could they? Sonar is confused since Golem doesn't have a dick..or does he? Sonar thought maybe he heard wrong and presses his ear against the door to hear better...]

Golem: Oh Yeah honey, Just...just like that!~

R/n:...Does that feel good?

Golem: Go faster!~

[The freaking curiosity was too much for Sonar as he throws the door open with his eyes half covered.]

Sonar: WHAT'S GOING OOOOoon...Here?

[Sonar is confused when he doesn't see a scene of animalistic passion in front of him, but instead finds R/n standing on a stool leaning against Golem while she rubs him with a scrub brush.]

Golem: Massage......*moans as R/n scrubs him on the back*

R/n, as she pats Golem's arm: Jeez, yer back's so tight and full of knots... What have you been doin'? You gotta loosen up more.

Sonar: Oh....Okay.

Golem: What did'cha think was going on?

Sonar, flustered: Nothing! Nothing at all... (chuckles) *holds up a shopping bag* Hey, I got that beer and rocket pop vodka you asked for.

[harveywritings92]

Prism: It's crazy the freaking 19 year old and her 20 year old construct boyfriend out drank us all last night, I swear R/n must part eldritch creature or something!

Prism: She and Golem were laughing and talking about Tf2 videos while handing out bottles of water and mini-boxes of cereal to everyone when we woke up this morning!

[harveywritings92]

[Sonar goes over to R/n and Golem's place to get some edibles (R/n has a license to sell) from them and stuck around to play L4d2 for a bit.]

R/n, shaking a bag, she glares at Sonar: Dude! You ate all my goldfish crackers.

Sonar: Those were not goldfish, man, they were weird lookin' and had a gross after taste.

Golem: That's cos those were knock offs called Crunchy Carps, we spend almost all of our money on rent 'n crap, so most of our food is weird off brands; in fact that's not Dr. Pepper yer drinking it's Prof. Zing.

Sonar, looks down at his can: Damn...it tastes just like Dr. pepper.

[harveywritings92]

Coupe, drinks out of a jug Malevola gave her: *spits*Oh, Whoa, what is this stuff? [reluctantly drinks again]

Malevola: It's Vic's potato moonshine. He went on a "distill anything" course. I mainly use it for Weedkiller or a substitute for nail polish remover.

R/n: What's it like?

Golem, takes a drink after Coupe hands him the jug: *spits*Eurgh! Sh*t! Urgh! F*ck! [sniffs jug, drinks some more]

[R/n tried it herself gagged, then tried it again this time she tried watering it down added some Tang powder to it; still tasted like battery acid and despair albeit slightly more palatable.]

[harveywritings92]

[Sonar is hitting on the cute mail room attendant he's seen around the office.]

Sonar: So what are you doing after work later.

R/n, doesn't realize he's hitting on her: I'm probably going to the library, I got a chemistry test coming up...

Sonar, assuming she means college: Oh, you're still in school, which one?

R/n: Our lady of perpetual sorrow.

Sonar: Er...I haven't heard of that one, is it new?

R/n: What are you talking about? it's the catholic high school off o-

[Sonar recoils as if R/n suddenly burst into flames]

Sonar: High school?! You're in high school?!...

R/n: Yeah, it's kind of embarrassing, I'm repeating the grade 12 beacause..

Sonar: Crap... Y'know what? Forget this conversation ever happened! *runs off*

R/n: Okay?

[later, R/n and her boyfriend are getting to go home when the realization hits her.]

R/n: Oh shit, I think he was asking me out.

Golem: Who was?

R/n: That crypto guy you work with, I guess he doesn't know I'm 19, 'cos when I told him I was in high school he thought I was under age and it scared him off. *chuckles* it was funny!

[Golem's eyes darkened and he whirled around just as Sonar was leaving the SDN building.]

Golem: *Growls and rushes towards Sonar* I'M GONNA KILL YA!

Sonar: Oh shit! *runs away*

R/n and Mebius's projected form stare in disbelief: ...

[Robert comes out of the elevator just in time to see a panicked Sonar running passed him followed by a pissed off Golem, he sighs and follows after them.]

[harveywritings92]

Demon bride au (This is a what if scenario, where R/n was sent to Hell instead of summoning Ghost to the human world.): R/n wakes up on an altar with cultists standing all around her.]

R/n, struggles with the binds: The fuck is this? {Date’s name}?! where are you, what happening?! (One of the cultists cuts her hand.) OW!

Cultist leader: Now we will start the ceremony, oh forces of the void hear my voice (a portal opens soon as they spill Y/n’s blood on glowing stone)

R/n: W-What is that? what did you do???

Cultist leader: We your fellow servants offer you this virgin Lamb–

R/n, interrupting: Wait, wait! Hold up, Hold up! …Virgin? Who the hell said I was virgin?

{Awkward silence.}

Cultist leader:…….Pardon?

R/n: I’m not a virgin, dude.

Cultist leader: {D/n}! You said they were a virgin!

D/n: She is, she’s Asexual!

{The other cultists groan and face palm.]

D/n: What?

R/n: Yeah, I’m ace. But I’m not dead, man. I’ve had sex before!

{While everyone’s yelling at [Date’s name] for f-ing up the ritual no one notices the portal becoming unstable until R/n is sucked in.]

Cultists: ….Shit!

[cut to the hell’s entrance gate where two demons stand guard for new souls to arrive.]

Ghost: Another one stood me up last night, Johnny, what’s wrong with me?

Soap: Nothing brother, people just don’t know a good thing when they see it. you’ll find the right person who does someday.

Ghost: Well I don’t want it to be someday. I wish that person would appear to me now!

{As if on cue the portal opens up in the sky and an unconscious R/n falls out of it into Ghost’s arms. The two demons stare down at the knocked out human stunned, then back up at the sky.]

Soap: Quick Ghost! Now wish for donut rain!

[harveywritings92]

[tw implied drug use]

[Cod demon au: Ghost and Soap are checking some demon’s passports (Context Ghost gave reader a magic choker that disguises her as a demon, she’s working as a agent for the Hell gate Station, until he and Soap can figure out a way to send her back to the human world).]

R/n, referring to a horned skeleton looking demon: Hey, check it out! (shows Ghost the passport.) This guy’s an Oni!

Ghost: You mean he was an Oni.

R/n: No.

Ghost, takes the passport from her: He’s not a Lich?

[R/n hums shaking her head as the skeleton like demon shifts uncomfortably under Ghost’s piecing gaze.]

Ghost, realizing what’s up:….How long were you using for (Oni's name)?

Oni: *coughs* Three years…

Ghost, wincing: Oh damn…It has taken it’s toll on you friend. 

(Ghost hands the Oni his passport back.)

Oni, tired: *sigh*…Tell me about it.

Soap, from the hell-tram platform: LAST CALL TO THE 8TH CIRCLE STATION! REAPEAT, LAST CALL THE 8TH CIRCLE STATION! ALL ABOARD!!!