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[he4d-banger]

I was bored out of my mind in ethics class, and this is the result.

I have never seen Jujutsu, but I thought it would be funny to make that Naoya frame with my favorite red head. Don't ask me about the hair and clothes tho, I know they are horrible hhhh.

[he4d-banger]

I think that, as a Fandom, we don't exploit enough Ohn and Hong cat behavior.

I mean, look at the potential...

[nomifae]

I present to you all...The King of Pride! 👑🍎

[sapphosscribe]

do you have any similar fic recs while we wait for updates for this one?? I need my bill fix 😭😭

Sadly, I try not to read other people’s Bill fics while writing mine because then I’ll subconsciously start trying to imitate their style 😂

I have a few recommendations on my Archive of Our Own Page that I’ll list below along with some other fics that I’ve been told are good from fans with excellent taste 😉

Monkey Wrench by beemygirl- Probably every Billford fan knows about this one, but I’m going to put it here anyway because it’s great! It’s an AU set in the 1970’s where Bill goes back in time and meets Ford as a human while working on the portal. It’s an absolute rollercoaster of a good time. The mini adventures in each chapter keep things interesting, the characters are on point, the jokes would have me laughing out loud at points. I actually had to stop reading this halfway through because the writing so strong. I’m looking forward to picking it up again when my I finish my fic.

The Heinz Dilemma by @electricalhuzzah - a really fun, fresh take on the stereotypical “Bill goes to work at the mystery shack for community service”. It’s laugh-out-loud hilarious, some great moments of Bill conceptualizing morality through friendship, and the smut is emotional and fun. I’m not entirely caught up, but overall a really great read. Another one I’m going to catch up on when I get a break.

A Promise and a Threat by @clarisimart- I haven’t had a chance to read this one yet, but I’ve heard some great things and have seen some killer lines about where it’s heading. Check this one out if you guys have time!

Dream Operator by gaylisterine- this one is also on my to-read list when I get a moment free from writing. It’s a case of Ford and Bill dream sharing with each other that’s sure to scratch the Billford itch of angsty relationship drama. It also promises a happy ending, which is something I always go in for as a writer.

Knowing Me, Knowing You by @f-imaginings- strap in for the long haul with this one folks! It’s over a million words and worth every minute! I’ve read the first ten chapters and am absolutely hooked. The author has a very strong voice in their writing, portrays the dysfunction of Bill and Ford’s relationship beautiful while also managing to make it incredibly funny and accurate to their characters. Plus Henchmaniacs! Hooray! I particularly love Ford’s characterization in this being naive and adoring though not a complete pushover. He’s still snippy and petty and thier dynamic is incredibly because of it.

Wasting Away in the Goldilocks Zone by @ckret2 - you can find this fic not only on ao3 but also right here on tumblr. One of my favorite Human Bill fics to date, the writing, humor, and characterization are all immaculate. It was good to the point I had to stop reading before I let their writing voice infiltrate my own story. I’m gnawing at the bars of my enclosure to read more. Go live my dreams for me while I work to bring you all the rest of A Human Condition.

And those are my recs @noneofyourbizzniess! If you guys have any, lmk down in the comments! I’m always looking for good reading material! Hopefully these keep you all sated in between updates for my fic.

Happy reading! 📚❤️

[he4d-banger]

I AM WHEEZING, HELP!

I love my Pinterest algorithm so much

[he4d-banger]

The scoundrel, upon their turn, commits an act most grievous — one certain to rouse Cale’s ire…

Them: *Loudly fucks everything up*

[he4d-banger]

Ah, yes, my two beloved darlings, beaming upon my most cherished platform. I shall raise a glass in their honor and savor it as though it were the finest vintage of the century.

[he4d-banger]

Five Stages

Cale: I go through the four stages of grief every time when I have to get out of bed.

Choi Han: Cale-nim, Don't you mean five stages?

Cale: no.

Cale: I never accept it.

[saphronethaleph]

Soresu Negotiations

“Get help,” Palpatine said. “You’re no match for him. He’s a Sith Lord.”

Obi-Wan turned to look at the Chancellor. “...yes?” he said. “But he’s also something else – something I’m surprised you’ve forgotten.”

“What?” Palpatine asked.

“A politician,” Obi-Wan replied, turning back to Dooku.

Anakin groaned, then sat down.

“Here we go,” he said.

Palpatine blinked, looking from Anakin to Obi-Wan.

“...what do you mean, Anakin?” he asked.

“This happens sometimes,” Anakin replied. “How do you think he got his nickname?”

“Count,” Obi-Wan said, at about the same time. “It’s occurred to me that I never actually found out what the Confederacy wants.”

“Isn’t it a little late for this?” Dooku asked. “We have been at war for several years.”

“True,” Obi-Wan conceded, readily. “The war having started on Geonosis, because of tracing back your clone army which we… appear to have appropriated, mostly because you did it in our name. But that’s how the war started – not your objectives.”

Dooku was silent for a moment.

“I assume some semblance of a point will be emerging,” he said, eventually. “If you could be so kind as to provide it?”

“Wars begin for all sorts of reasons,” Obi-Wan replied. “But how they end… they end because a mutual settlement has been reached. And it’s occurred to me that I don’t know what you’d want out of a victory.”

He spread his hand, the one not holding the – unlit – saber. “It’s not the conquest of the Republic, I can tell that much. If the CIS annexed the Republic, what you’d have would still be the Republic, just under a different name… it’s not the Republic without the corruption that’s been causing it problems, because most of the corruption in the Republic was – was – the big industrial concerns like the Techno Union, Commerce Guild, Trade Federation. But you seem to have taken all of those off our hands, and they provide essentially your entire military so I don’t think anyone else could honestly believe that either.”

“I wouldn’t expect a Jedi to understand,” Dooku replied. “The Confederacy’s member systems have concerns relating to over-centralization.”

Obi-Wan stared at him for a long moment.

“...no they don’t,” he said.

“I hardly think you can have earned your reputation as a negotiator, Kenobi, if you are so willing to be insulting,” Dooku said, archly.

“That’s not what I mean,” Obi-Wan replied. “I mean… yes, now the Republic has an army, though really it’s actually the Jedi’s army and we’re simply letting them borrow it, but four years ago the Galactic Republic was proverbially incapable of doing anything. It took emergency powers for the Chancellor to get the Republic to authorize having any kind of military whatsoever – and the only one available was the one you ordered. That’s not over-centralization.”

He drummed his fingers on his ‘saber. “And I note that I overheard Nute Gunray insisting on the head of Senator Amidala – literally, in those words – as his price for signing a treaty. But I still haven’t heard an actual answer. What does the Galaxy look like if the Confederacy wins?”

Dooku frowned, and after about three seconds Obi-Wan glanced at the Chancellor.

“Didn’t you discuss this at any point, your excellency?” he asked. “Count Dooku doesn’t seem to have thought about this.”

Palpatine blinked.

“...he’s a Sith Lord,” he repeated. “Shouldn’t you be fighting him?”

“It’s called diplomacy, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan replied, before returning his attention to Dooku. “Grandmaster, are you seriously telling me that you never thought about what you would do if you won?”

Anakin checked his comlink, for the time, then the ship trembled slightly.

“Artoo?” he asked. “Can you tell those ships outside to stop shooting at us and give us a wide berth? This could take hours and I don’t want to find out if my name’s literal.”

“Hours?” Palpatine repeated.

“He’s rolling,” Anakin replied, rolling his eyes. “Like I say, I’m used to this.”

He rummaged in a pocket of his robes, taking out a miniature toolkit, and began disassembling his lightsaber. “I’m pretty sure I can retune these crystals to give two stable configurations which it’ll snap between, that should give me a length toggle instead of a single adjustable length…”

“Are you taking your lightsaber apart?” Palpatine hissed. “What if you need to fight?”

“It’s okay, Chancellor, I’ll get about five minutes’ warning if the negotiations are going downhill,” Anakin replied. “That should be time to put it back together again…”

Palpatine looked up to Obi-Wan, who – sure enough – was still going.

“...of course, a separate but related issue is what it’s going to be like afterwards,” Obi-Wan said. “In principle the Republic and the Jedi Order could probably accept the existence of Sith so long as we actually knew who they were and they weren’t trying to destroy us. It’s the fact that the first Sith we met in a thousand years tried to run Anakin over and cut Qui-Gon’s head off as an opening move that’s soured us towards them a bit… but are you really going to be content as someone whose whole job is to die for Sidious?”

Dooku stared at Obi-Wan, baffled, then glanced at Palpatine and Anakin.

“What do you mean?” he asked, forcing his gaze back to Obi-Wan.

“Sidious is your Master, we know that much,” Obi-Wan replied. “Partly because you told me yourself. But has he ever put himself in danger? Or has it all been you dealing with Jedi like myself and my apprentice? Putting yourself out there, in danger, while you do exactly what he says?”

He smiled slightly. “A Jedi would accept that, but you’re a Sith – you’ve said so yourself. Sith are self-interested. What do you think your new master is getting out of the situation? Because if you don’t know, it’s got to be something and it’s probably something he doesn’t want to tell you.”

“My master is quite willing to put himself in danger,” Dooku said, then clamped his lips shut at a frantic mouthed shut up from Palpatine.

“Real or feigned?” Obi-Wan asked. “Do you think he wouldn’t manipulate you? He’s been doing it to everyone else – you’ve said it.”

Dooku’s brow furrowed.

“But we’re getting off topic,” Obi-Wan said, turning to look at Palpatine. “Chancellor, what about this as a starting point? Your emergency powers were granted to resolve the crisis, and I’m sure you want to abandon them as soon as possible… so why not take away the whole reason why the individual systems in the Confederacy had problems with the Republic to begin with? Freely allow the departure of any system which wishes to do so, under the emergency powers legislation; enact a progressive tax, one which hits the Core worlds harder owing to their greater ability to pay, to sustain a carrier based navy able to hunt pirates more effectively than conduct occupations or orbital bombardment, and have the navy established on a sector-federal two-level model?”

Palpatine stared at Obi-Wan for at least ten seconds.

“...he’s a Sith Lord,” he said, yet again.

“Oh, shut up,” Dooku replied. “You’re a Sith Lord and I don’t see you doing anything constructive.”

Obi-Wan glanced at Palpatine.

“...you know,” he began. “I’m quite sure you’d need to note that on your financial disclosure forms, your Excellency.”

He turned sideways, so he could see both Dooku and Palpatine at the same time. “What was the point of this whole abduction, anyway?”

“As it happens, I was supposed to kill you,” Dooku said. “It’s the only way to turn Anakin to the Dark Side, if you’re out of the way.”

“Huh?” Anakin asked. “Is something up? I’ve almost got the crystals realigned.”

“This plan looked a lot better this morning,” Palpatine muttered.

[he4d-banger]

Cale: I don't like cats

Also Cale:

[he4d-banger]

White Radish doesn't now what's coming

to be continued...

Somebody please confiscate my tablet

[he4d-banger]

I made this a few months ago and forgot about it

[he4d-banger]

So, Kim Rok Soo knows how to sew. Imagine team members going to him with clothes to repare and some offerings, since I am sure they lacked materials to make new clothes at first.

Choi Jung Soo and Lee Soo Hyuk would definitely tease him by calling him sleeping beauty when he falls asleep while mending their uniforms.

I imagine them looting fabric stores so they can make new clothes.

[he4d-banger]

A not so unpopular opinion

I don't think we should put all the blame on Cale for the kids colorful language.

Like common, are you telling me that they never heard an adult cursing before? Specially if we consider their circumstances before they met Cale?

Yeah, sure, our salad guy added to the list, but you can't convince me most of the bad words the children averaging I don't know how many years by now came from him.

[he4d-banger]

Alright

Whoever did this, you made the stressful night I was having. I love this fandom

Now, I need you guys to create a name for Shrimp Cale, like Calebab, or Kale Heinidonski/Honeylettuce

[he4d-banger]

"The only reason I haven't killed the gods is because I'd have to replace them and that's too much responsibility"

-Cale Henituse at some point-

[he4d-banger]

Now i understand why Ron calls him puppy OMG I WANNA ADOPT HIM!!!!! So cute so cute!