sad

My name is Sunniva. You will never be able to pronounce it right.

[yikestruly-deactivated20171207]

[fuckyeahdragrace]

[hollowboobtheory]

i’d kill for a steady income tbh

[hollowboobtheory]

so turns out this is called being an assassin. finally, a career for me

[baawri]

[mogifire]

[lokigodofmischieflaufeyson-deac]

My favourite part of Penguins of Madagascar was definitely Dave putting actors and actresses names in normal sentences.

[sherlock-hannibal]

Everyone needs an adorable Gordon Ramsay on their dash

[toshio-the-starman]

I love this man.

[tastefullyoffensive]

Bob the golden retriever is best friends with eight birds and a hamster. (photos via @bob_goldenretriever/imgur)

[jound]

YES

[micdotcom]

Watch: Ellen DeGeneres takes Caitlyn Jenner to task for her hypocritical comments on gay marriage 

[thishartominefeelz]

Yikes. :(

[netals]

[sherlck-deactivated20140622]

wear a different perfume when you commit murder fuckin amateurs 

[feathery-soul-deactivated201408]

also wear shoes that aren’t your actual size and use gloves if you have to touch anything

[agnosticwitch]

what the hell is this here? A how-to-commit-the-perfect-crime??

[moontideempress]

[vimbia]

Wear a wig. Contact lenses . Change your accent . Change Hand when writing . Layer up to make you look big if your small n vice versa . Contour the hell outta your face.

[jazmynedrakeford]

Get your car interior thoroughly washed, then purposely dirty it up again.

[youhavearighttoyourwrongopinion]

Also use an icicle for the weapon because it melts away Buy a ticket to a show and tell as many people / post it on social media that u went to the show

[caribe-bby]

Y'all suspect af😂

[dookiediamonds-deactivated20200]

*adds 363,462 more people to list of that I will fuck never with*

[electricocelot]

Make sure you set up a solid alibi Pay for everything in cash

Or, for those of you who’ve read Roald Dahl’s Lamb to the Slaughter, feed the murder weapon to the police

[justinripley]

[adventuresofichabod-deactivated]

OMG HES WAITING FOR A REPLY

[kovvic]

[malzallal-deactivated20170602]

[dr1p]

[catsbeaversandducks]

By Karen Zack (@teenybiscuit)

[chescaleigh]

I love this meme so much. It’s just missing my favorite 

[millennial-review-deactivated20]

[tinyowlnonsense]

OH MY GOD