Trying to flirt voice: Hey girl, you uh- umm- are you a mech cause I'd uh- like to be nestled in you very much like a big suit of armour thank you- a-and maybe wear a collar and bark whilst inside you-
Xuebing Du

JVL

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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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Janaina Medeiros
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will byers stan first human second
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i don't do bad sauce passes

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taylor price
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Cosimo Galluzzi

oozey mess
trying on a metaphor
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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@hiitsharper
Trying to flirt voice: Hey girl, you uh- umm- are you a mech cause I'd uh- like to be nestled in you very much like a big suit of armour thank you- a-and maybe wear a collar and bark whilst inside you-
If she says jump I don’t even ask how high I just start jumping and hope I’m right
Handlers deserve to fear for their lives occasionally, as a treat
a bullet would really hit the spot right now
should i bite Her
obviously??
Ugh, see, I really do love the mechslpo genre but I just can’t get into the idea of being fully broken- because all of my enjoyment comes from the attempts to break me.
I just live to be as insolent as possible towards a handler, repeatedly and constantly defying every order they give me and laughing as I get punished for it. I need someone to see the insanity in my eyes as I turn the tables on them, dare them to put a revolver to my head and watch the sparkle in my eyes as I hear it click through empty cylinders, because they wouldn’t waste such a promising hound, no matter how mouthy she is.
I want to piss handlers off with how insufferably aware I am in the face of orders, make them realize I only obey orders because it gives me a sick sense of joy to toy with them, make them think that they were the one to finally tame such a defiant pilot before I turn around and laugh maniacally as they press their boot against my ribcage for mouthing off.
Because I’m not here to be someone’s broken little pet, I’m here to be someone’s problem.
*looking up at you cutely with my big wet brown eyes* - “so how much pain do you think i could take before i black out?”
Shoutout to hands tied behind the back, gotta be one of my favourite positions
It's Pride month ye filthy mutts.
That's right, for the entire month, I task you all with being the smuggest little shits possible. Become insufferably gay and piss off your Handlers, and when they ask?
Just say Pride Month and refuse to elaborate.
Disobeying orders to get more kills? Pride Month
Alternatively, indulge in the rest of the sins!
Refusing to go on missions? Sloth Month
Hoarding all the spare mech parts? Greed Month
Eating Handler's sandwich from the break room? Gluttony Month
Topping your Handler and calling her Good Girl? Lust Month
Punching your Handler? Wrath Month
Bullying the Ace pilot your Handler always pampers? Envy Month
Point is, have fun and make your Handler fill out more paperwork because of your actions. It's time for YOU to be the problem.
Hound has been having too many thoughts. Need them beaten out until nothing is left.
The war was over. He was safe. No one would ever be able to hurt him again.
That's what they told him anyway.
The Empire was defeated two years ago.
He was rescued two years ago.
He was safe from the surgeries they forced upon him, the drugs that left him a blissful mess, and the things they commanded him to do.
He did not feel safe.
He still dreams about it every night.
Dreams about his Handler.
Dreams about the girl.
He was forced into therapy when they got him out. He was told he was a mess. He does not remember it very well anymore.
Does not want to remember.
The therapist had to patch his broken mind back together after all he had been through. Make sure that he was himself again rather than what he was before.
It helped him, he supposes. He knows how to act now. What to say. How to walk with the straight back in the way they wanted him to. How to talk with the deep gravely voice he hated hearing but needed to speak in. The voice which they told him was the correct way to talk.
It was still hard even after all this time. He had to make the effort constantly. When he stopped acting the way he was supposed to people around him got uncomfortable. So he always had to. It was exhausting.
It was only recently his therapist judged him recovered enough to know that he was not quite as safe as they told him. They told him his Handler was still out there. They did not catch Her in the purge. She escaped.
They apologized for hiding it from him. Told him they knew he could handle it and that he would always man up and take whatever came his way. They told him it was policy.
His two closest friends had sworn to find Her and avenge him. Told him exactly what they would do to Her when they got their hands on her.
He did not tell them he did not want that.
The therapist told him that a man should want revenge against those that hurt him.
The two were always talking about what he was like before he was captured. They brought up stories of the battles they fought, beers they drunk, and girls they fucked.
He always laughed with them at the stories even though he could not remember them very much and did not find the stories very funny. It was all murky like a distant dream. He laughed because that is what the therapist told him he was supposed to do. A man should enjoy those things so he should enjoy those things.
A week ago one of his friends told him that he had found Her. She was on a small world at the edge of the galaxy. He had been tracking rumors all this time looking for her so that all three of them could take revenge. That the three of them should go and punish her themselves.
He said okay because that is what a man was supposed to do.
So here he was. Ten miles out from the nearest town. Waiting outside Her house. The ground was covered in a thick layer of snow. His breath was a fog in the night air.
His friends were with him. They told him they should go at night when she was asleep and unprepared.
He did not tell them She was always a night owl.
They walked around the house checking it. No back doors which they said was good. Big enough windows to fit through. They said that was bad. They discussed it and said that even if she ran the cold would get her and the snow would mean they could track her.
His friends broke down the door and they all entered the house.
She was sitting there in front of the fire wearing only a robe. The chair she was on was large and plush. She was holding a book, reading, not even paying the slightest attention to them.
She was mostly as he remembered. Her black hair glinted in the firelight. Her eyes still shone that cold blue but where they once were crystal clear now they were foggy and dull.
His two friends threatened her. Cursed her for her actions. Told her they were going to ruin her then take her to prison to rot.
She looked at them. Bored glazed eyes clearly uninterested and uncaring until they looked past his two friends and landed on him.
Her eyes lit up. The fog cleared from them and she spoke.
“What have they done to you puppy?”
Her voice was drenched in concern and pain. It seemed to weigh her down like She was under a thousand feet of water and could not take a breath. It was an agonizing thing full of hurt and pity and shame.
His two friends talked about how they helped him. How he went to therapy. How they saved him. How they rescued him from what She did.
He does not say a word.
“Is that true?”
She asks in that voice that was as strong as steel to those that did not understand her while any who could look past the surface saw the fragility in Her voice.
His friends are walking to Her now.
He stayed silent.
She looked past his friends as they reached out and grabbed Her arms. Staring directly into his eyes, analyzing.
“Hound attack.”
The hound lunged.
She rested her head on her handler's lap staring up at those clear blue eyes content to soak in the heat from the roaring fire.
She was sucking on a mint Handler gave her after she complained about the coppery taste that still stuck in her mouth even after Handler washed it out with water.
She felt Handler run her fingers through her hair, still wet from the warm bath needed to clean off the blood. She hoped it would grow long quickly. She hated that it was so short.
Handler had apologized for not being able to grab her when she ran. She said she looked for the hound but could not find her. She did manage to grab her collar on Her way out. It was now in its proper place, wrapped around her neck.
It did not matter that she left. They were together now. That's all that mattered.
Handler said that they would have to dig two big holes tomorrow. That tomorrow was going to be a long exhausting day.
She did not mind. It might be hard work but if Handler needed it done she would do it.
Handler said that after the digging they would go to town and get her medicine. She could not wait. She missed her medicine.
But until they needed to get up and do that she was happy here, with her head on Handler's lap.
She closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh.
She was home.
Fun Ways To Have A Handler Defect From Fascism!
The Rookie: A brand new Handler who got brought into this program for her psychology knowledge, but is immediately horrified at what she sees. Very easy to subvert; when given the nearest opportunity, she will ride in the copilot seat with one of the main Handler's Hounds for 'close-up analysis', only to cut comms and tell the Hound to book it. Generally well received by Rebels, due to strong sense of morals.
The Grief Stricken: This Handler used to be at the top of her game, until she fell in love with her prized Hound. Then that Hound either died or was permanently crippled. Now she wants out, but is stuck due to countless eyes being on her due to her status. May defect if given a definitive opportunity, especially if it means that her crippled hound(s) get a better home.
The Paperclip: This one defected out of the sheer incompetence of her superiors, and figured that if the Imperials didn't value her efforts, then maybe the cute little rebels would. Is she still a piece of shit and very fascist? Oh 100%, but the rebels need her expertise to win the war. When this war is over, then they can discuss consequences.
The Burnout: This one was already on rocky ground, always being too invested in the lives of her Hounds. After witnessing fifty deaths too many, always pointless so that some military officer could get another shiny medal for her sacrifice, she's about had enough. Similar to the Grief Stricken, but is more likely to shout Carpe Diem and breach her way out in a stolen mech.
The Broken: This Handler was captured by her former Hounds, now turned rebels. She is no longer a Handler, or a person for that matter. She exists as a warning to the Imperial Handlers, used as an example of what will happen to Handlers if they even consider joining the rebellion, much less give their Hounds kindness. These warnings often fail because Imperials are legit just that shitty to everyone, including their Handlers, that many just chance it anyways.
The Deceased: This Handler ceased being fascist because someone put a bullet through its skull.
Right, so, here's what's gonna happen, mutt.
You're gonna be piloting your little mech on some battlefield or another. You're doing well, turning the tide. I'm sure you think you're the next Little Miss Rebel Ace, real hot shit.
Suddenly, you're going to be swarmed by half a dozen mechs. Not even competently - I'm not going to waste my prize hounds on a mutt like you - but with mindless ferocity.
You'll take down one or two, I'm sure. Perhaps even three. But the rest of them will tear through your wiring, rip open your coolant piping, and render your precious Memento Mori inert.
You'll try to escape, I'm sure, or perhaps take your own life to prevent capture.
My dogs won't allow it. I won't allow it
They will spring from their bodies of steel, scrambling up to the cockpit, wrenching it open to get at the vulnerable flesh within.
They will wrench you to the ground, disarm you, tear the clothes off your body.
Then, and only then, will you see Me.
I will stride into the cockpit, lifted there on the open hand of my personal escort mech. In my hands will be an electrobrand. It will slowly heat up, as you are forced to the ground, hounds restraining your limbs.
I will pass the red-hot brand to an assistant. I do not sully my hands with mutts.
They will burn my mark into your flesh, forever claiming you as my own.
You will be taken back, along with your useless mech, and I will break you, slowly. Gleefully. I will enjoy it.
You will learn to, too.
When you are finally and truly remade, I will take you out of the kennels by the leash. I will take you to a seating area. You will be allowed to briefly glance at the field we are overlooking.
There will be a mech standing there. 'Memento Mori,' its inscription reads. It will mean nothing to you.
I will take a seat, and instruct you to kneel. I will present my boot to you. You will know what to do. You relish it.
When first you mount my boot, a thunderclap will sound, though the sky is clear. An anti-tank round will be shot from miles and miles away, and it will impact Memento Mori.
It tears out chunks of new plating - I had it fully refurbished for this.
Another missile impacts.
Then another.
I will allow you to begin rutting as Memento Mori is torn to shreds in front of me.
You do not look. You do not care to. It is meaningless to you.
All you can think of is my boot, how good it makes you feel. Nothing else matters anymore.
I will enjoy the sight of your once-proud mech being reduced to rubble as target practice, while the mutt that thought it was a pilot fucks away the last of its memories against the black leather of my boot.
This is what will happen to you, mutt. And you will thank me for it.
[If you liked this, check out my other work! ♡]
I uh... I need a minute
On the subject of Lycanthropy in Hounds:
Ok, gonna be real, this topic is outside of my wheelhouse, so I'm calling in backup. Y'all remember mentions of a Handler named Faust? Yeah, she trains Harpies, but she's also knowledgable on this subject due to her past, so this entry is her's to write up. Enjoy.
A Faustian Guide To Lycanthropy:
So it seems the Hangar Queen themself called in this favour, and I am one to honour my deals.
So: Lycanthropy.
You might be wondering how it's any different from a Hound in concept. A person that becomes an animal? Sounds like a Hound.
That's where you'd be wrong.
A Lycanthrope is the hybrid of Human and Hound.
When you make a Hound, you are breaking the Pilot's ego like an egg shell, and forcing the yolk inside to be sculpted into a weapon. This is well known, and well understood at this point. It's become a science in and of itself, hence why Hound subtypes and new breeds of pilots are made, such as my beloved Harpies.
Now, if a Hound is the result of breaking an ego and forcing your way into a person's head, what’s Lycanthropy?
Simple:
When you shatter an ego, the self still remains, albeit broken and strained by paradoxes to keep it in check.
Lycanthropy is what happens when the broken shell, the previous self, and the disturbed yolk that is the Hound, meld.
The hard part of studying Lycanthropy is that each manifestation shows itself differently, but thankfully I do have an example from my past in the Union.
There was a work in progress Hound named Orchid. She was small, weak, frail, and too nice for a program designed to churn out Hounds.
Her Handler hated it. The apologies, the kindness to other Hounds, the desire to make us proud, the Handler in question hated her for it. She saw this softness as weakness, and desired it purged when she decided to make Orchid into a full fledged Hound.
But something went wrong.
Orchid's mind did break, allowing the creation of the Hound within it, but something was... off.
Orchid obeyed orders, killed for the Union, and did seem to enter a state of Hound rage when activated by her Handler in combat.
But I always found it offputting that the differences between her Human and Hound states were... shrinking. She'd sometimes speak gibberish in Hound state, when Hounds aren't supposed to speak. And in Human state, she was always strangely... hungry. Not for food, but the way she looked at you, it was like she was aiming to size you up.
Her Handler didn't help this issue. Several times I brought it up, and several times i found myself blown off by her ignorance. I saw a ticking time bomb where everyone else saw a failure, and I knew I wanted to give myself some protection. So I gave Orchid a collar, a gift. Her Handler hated it, but she did start performing better, so she was allowed to keep it.
Then came the breaking point.
A group of rebels, finally tired of letting us do as we pleased, launched a surprise attack on our main base. They couldn't have picked a better time too, most of the Hound roster was out sick from an illness sweeping the base, leaving only Orchid as the last functional pilot on roster.
It was a disaster. By the time we'd finally gotten reinforcements, Orchid was running on fumes. And yet, despite it all, she'd managed to fend of ten rebel chassis, tricked out to the max, with her piddly Rattlecan her Handler forced her to use.
Note, fend off, not kill. She was playing purely defensive, trying to slow progress, which in my opinion she performed flawlessly.
Her Handler disagreed.
When Orchid returned, her Handler was in a particularly bitchy mood, and decided to punish her in front of the mech techs, likely planning on letting them try their way with her afterwards. Did the usual Handler spiel, made her strip down, smacked her around, brought out a whip, the whole nine yards, but she wasn't satisfied. She never was.
Her first and last mistake was trying to remove the collar.
Orchid hadn't been in Hound state, I know this.
But when she was lying there, broken, tired, and holding onto what little shred of dignity she had left, trying to remove that collar broke something.
The wall. The invisible wall between Human and Hound. There had already been bleed, but the risk of losing the one item she had control over broke the damn.
I can't forget the screams her Handler made as she lunged atop her like a starving wolf. Her hunger would be sated, she'd make sure of it.
I remember finding bits of skin scattered through that particular part of the bay for a week afterwards. I remember her laughter, her desperate laughter. I remember the howls, the sorrow filled howls as she turned herself upon her leash holder. And I remember her begging me for help, while coated in the entrails of her own Handler.
Now, you may be asking if her programming survived this mental break, and the answer is no. Not even her trigger phrase remained, as she no longer was two separate halves, but instead a new whole.
You're also likely wondering what became of Orchid after that. Well, let's just say that, despite my preference for birds being discovered shortly after this incident, i still enjoy the company of my loyal Mandragora. She's much happier now, in this liminal state. Human, but hungry like a Hound. She's my lovely little secretary that I feed plenty of pastries to, and keep her as far away from fighting as possible. I've found that channeling her slightly more... Houndly temperments towards the idiots who try to pester me with nonsense helps her get it out of her system nicely.
I suppose as a conclusion to my experiences. I have seen it happen a few other times, but those will be for another log on Lycanthropy. I just wanted to share this excerpt from my past life, so you at least understand what Lycanthropy does to Hounds.
This was fun, and now my debt to the Hangar Queen is settled.
Handler Faust, out.
It's not My preferred environment for breaking in a new hound, unsurprisingly. But alas, a woman has to make do with what is available to Her.
I sit, calmly, in the hard plastic chair provided for Me. It is not comfortable. Deliberately so, of course; best keep the prisoner off-balance as much as possible.
It matters not.
Nor does the imposing, heavy-set steel table right in front of Me, polished to a sheen, though no doubt it has been covered in the blood of many a broken nose. Neither does the bright lamp that makes the eyes water, or the featureless white walls.
It is all beneath Me.
I was forced to use them Myself a few times, naturally, during My apprenticeship. My dear mentor, God rest Her soul, had a more intimidative bent to Her style. More... physical.
If I didn't respect Her results so much, I'd have called Her methods crude.
Still, My opinions do not change the past.
I am at least modestly acquainted with the use of these interrogative tools, even if I prefer My own means of extracting information and grinding down the psyches of My tools-in-the-making.
I have enough experience to spot your lack of it, at least.
Oh, it's not awful. You have clearly paid attention during your training, and you've had at least some practice.
But the angle of the lamp you dare point at My face is just ever-so-slightly off. You bang on the table too close to the edge, robbing the sound of that hollow, echoing quality that should be reverberating in My bones.
I would have almost called your work passably close to competent, if not for the obvious blunder of allowing Me to continue wearing My uniform.
The imposing coat and leather riding boots - spotless, naturally - alone serve Me well in our duel of wills, potent totems of dominance both, but not nearly as useful as My cap.
The rim allows Me to simply incline My head ever so slightly, and the glare of your lamp falters entirely.
Not that I bother, of course. My mentor has trained Me on brighter lamps than these, for longer than you could ever dream of keeping Me here.
No, I simply maintain eye contact, calculating where your eyes are based on the silhouette I see in front of Me, shining the lamp at My eyes and wasting My time asking Me all sorts of inane questions.
Really, you'd think you'd be more creative. 'What are the coordinates of your headquarters' (evacuated, though I dare you to go investigate), 'where are our comrades' (in the kennels or in the ground) 'What did you do to them' (you'll learn soon enough).
Nothing I haven't been asked before.
Frankly, I'm disappointed.
Days of playing My 'captors', nudging them to let you interrogate Me, because of the potential I saw in you, and all you manage is some limp-wristed questioning that even those 'human rights groups' you rebels are so fond of would condemn for being too soft.
But still, an out is an out.
Besides, let it never be said I am not a patient woman. Despite your sub-par performance, I see potential in you. Impress Me during out exit from this dump you call a base, and I will take My time to nourish and hone that potential into My newest blade.
It's all too easy to work My way into your brain, of course. You scream and you shout, as if that will give you authority, and My calm, measured responses make it all too clear who is really in charge here.
Soon, you get angry enough to make a mistake. You let slip some information about yourself. You demand to know where we took Liliana. You ask with a bit too much care in your voice. A hint of desperation you can't quite conceal. Perhaps, from others, you could've.
But not from Me.
I do not miss leverage when it presents itself.
I do not miss anything about My prey.
Your eyes grow wide as her name leaves your mouth. You recover quickly, but for a few seconds, it is written plainly on your face that you know you messed up. We both know it's over.
Mate in five, sweetheart.
Of course, we still have to play it out. Such is the nature of this little game.
I pretend to not know who Liliana is. Remark that she probably took a railgun round to the head, like so much other rebel scum.
A loud "NO! THAT'S WRONG, YOU'RE LYING!" barrages Me from the other side of the table.
Mate in four.
Time to change tack.
Oh, yes, I say. Liliana. Of course. I remember. She entered My programme a little while ago. Six months, give or take?
She was quite resistant. Very feisty. Took a lot of work. Took a lot of My precious time.
Mate in three.
More screams. More yells. You stomp around the table, leaving the lamp dangling from its chord. You grab Me by the collar. Your first connects with My face. Blood trickles from the corner of My lip. My smile never fades.
My eyes meet yours, directly this time.
Mate in two.
I see the fear in them, warring with the anger. You realise how deep you've already dug your own grave.
Something else is in there, too. Arousal.
Fascinating. Not something I normally see this early. Potential indeed.
You demand to know what I did to Liliana. Your last mistake.
Mate in one.
I gladly acquiesce. I explain to you what My job entails. What I do to the rebels that enter the kennels. What happens to their notions of self, their entire personhood; all stripped away, leaving only the pliable dogs underneath.
In agonising detail, I tell you how I broke your precious Liliana.
The fact that she never entered My kennels is immaterial, of course. She's probably actually dead in a ditch somewhere, on some forgotten battlefield, but you do not want to believe that, and so, in your desperation, you claw at any alternatives.
Any, even if they are worse than death.
And so, you believe My words. They are easier to accept than the alternative, no matter how horrifying they are.
Tears fill your eyes. Your knees buckle, then give way.
Good. Let knowledge of where you belong be your first lesson. Beneath Me. Kneeling for Me. At My boot.
I ask you if you want to see Liliana again. Empty and hollow, you nod.
When I command you to undo the handcuffs that bind Me to the chair, you comply robotically. I notice a stiffness in your pants. Again, an unusual level of arousal for this early in the process. Perhaps you have a sadistic bent, and the thought of what happened to your Liliana excites you, on some level. Interesting. This will have to be explored later.
The handcuffs fall to the side, and I rise from the seat. You remain on the floor, kneeling.
I sink to one knee, cupping your face in My gloved hands.
I lift your head to make your gaze meet Mine, savouring the broken look in your eyes.
It's always best when it's fresh.
"Fear not," I say, with the kindness of a shark smelling blood, "you will be at Liliana's side soon, My dear, new, hound. What do you think of that? Are you not grateful?"
Slowly, tears streaking down your face, you nod.
I smirk, and decide to bask in My latest victory. A brief indulgence, well-earned.
"Thank Me," I command.
Your lips move. I feel your breath on My face, but I cannot make out the words. It makes sense, I suppose; your will has been shattered, your psyche ground beneath My boot. I shall grant you leniency in My triumph, and graciously lean in closer to hear you say the words that will seal your fate as Mine.
Check and ma-
"Safeword," you spit out. Clearly; cheerfully, even, all horror and pain vanished as if it never existed.
My limbs seize up.
My muscles spasm and contract.
My body is no longer Mine to control.
I topple to the floor, eyes darting around the room, breath rapid.
This was not supposed to happen.
You moan, a wet patch rapidly expanding on your crotch. It's the lustful howl I have heard from many of My hounds more times than I care to remember, but I have never experienced it like this. I am looking up at you. You are looming over Me.
The world is wrong. This cannot happen.
"Fuuuuuck," you pant, slumping against the steel table, groping yourself like some bitch in heat, "that was so fucking good."
My eyes widen in confusion. I strain against the chemicals locking My limbs in place, desperate to reassert control.
"You like that, 'Handler'?" you ask, in between breathy moans as you rub your breasts and your erect cock through your uniform. The mock respect you place on My title infuriates Me even more than My lack of mobility.
"Paralytic agent," you continue, still pleasuring yourself, "dermal implant, activated by a trigger phrase."
A brief "Haaa~♡" interrupts, as you reach what must be your third climax in five minutes.
"We... we took quite a bit of inspiration from the shit you freaks got up to, in a way," you say. “The agent's a compound of that liquid midnight stuff you like to pump into your hounds, and the parallels to the trigger phrases -fffffhfhhffhhuuuUUUCK♡- you sick fucks like to use are obvious."
"'Course," you say with a grin and a wink, "we only use them to stop the rapist sadist freaks, instead of facilitating 'em."
Spent and blissed out, you slowly get to your feet, weak as your legs are.
"Or, well, we mostly don't facilitate 'em," you correct yourself "I am just weird. Guess I'm just as sick as you, just in the opposite direction."
"See," you say, standing over My still-immobile form, "when I first heard of that hound shit y'all do, I damn near came my brains out. Exhibitionist petplay? Brainwashing? Ego death?! Fuuuck, I'm getting hard again just thinking about it."
I glare at you - or I would, if the muscles in My face would only obey Me. Your disrespect for My art is bordering on the sacrilegious, and My fury knows no bounds, even in its powerlessness.
"Now, obviously, I ain't stupid enough to go running dick-first into the first Imperial ambush I can find in hopes of getting dragged to the kennels," you say, grabbing at your crotch as you loom over Me, "I still hate you fascist dogs, after all, and I ain't about to switch sides for realsies.”
Comprehension begins to seep unbidden into My mind. I resent it. Resent you.
“At the same time, the kinky bedroom play - believe me, I'm not the only one here getting off to what y'all are doing - just wasn't cutting it for me anymore."
You are wet enough to leak through your pants, now. A thick, drooping droplet falls onto the leg of My pant. If looks could kill, you would have suffered a million deaths.
"So when I heard we'd captured a for-real, actual Handler? I was begging the brass to get to my hands on you instantly. 'Course, they were hesitant at first, but once I explained to them that this was probably the best - if not straight up only - way to actually crack that impenetrable facade of yours, they relented. I'm sure they'll be getting plenty out of you, now."
...
You are right.
That realisation fills me with shame.
The rage ebbs away, replaced by an all-consuming self-loathing. How could i sink so low? i should be better than this. Better than you.
i am not.
That much is clear, now.
i have failed as a Handler. No longer worthy of the title. My mentor would have me in the kennels for this, and She would be right for it.
i am done.
A small, detached part of me wonders, academically, if this is what it felt like for all of my hounds, too.
i cannot bear to look at you, but your footsteps echoing through the room indicate you are leaving.
"I hope you enjoyed that brief illusion of control, 'Handler'," you say, over the sound of the heavy metal door unlocking. "It's all you will be getting for the foreseeable future. But don't worry, I'll be back when I need my next fix of hounding. See you theeeheeen!~♡"
A tear rolls down my face as the door shuts behind you.
i can't believe i have been reduced to this. A fucking kink dispenser for some fucked-up rebel who'd have washed out of my kennels for being too pathetically eager. Fallen farther, even, than my hounds. They, at least, could be simple animals.
i am nothing, now.
Your footsteps fade into the distance.
Check and mate.
[If you liked this, check out my other work! ♡]
I need someone to wreck me so bad that there is nothing left in my brain.
girl who has you pinned. girl who is bigger and stronger than you. girl who in spite of this is looking at you like a lost puppy. girl who is whining and trembling with need. girl who locks eyes with you and frantically mutters “pleasepleasepleaseplease” under her breath. lustdrunk mutt who waits for permission to take what it wants despite knowing it could at any time. dog who is so so so so good.