Putting the Ass in Assassin

Mireille, White Court Vampire Hitwoman. [Dresden Files OC, Mun 18+]

[splattermemes-deactivated202007]

Send in “I won’t judge.” for my muse to confess something to yours

[askbox-dares]

Rate my character of their attractiveness.

[alphamxther-blog]

askbox-dares:

A+: Flawless/Sexy

A-: Gorgeous/Hot

B+: Beautiful/Handsome

B-: Pretty/Cute

C+: Cute/Decent

C-: Decent/Okay

D+: Okay/Umm…

D-: Ugly

F: Horrid

[hitwhampire]

Random char planning

3of4: On the topic of Whamps, I am starting to write down notes on what Mireille would do if/when she retires from hitwomaning.

Steeb: porn?

3of4: nah, I see her having fun as professional gambler

3of4: I mean until some moron steals he car, shoots her dog a few days after her wife’s funeral or some shit

AJ Summerlin: John Wick whamp...

AJ Summerlin: The world is not ready...

[hitwhampire]

Open Starter - On the Range

[hitwhampire]

“And what, pray tell, makes you think I am a rules-abiding person where nudity, nakedness and sex is involved?” her smile took on am imp-ish quality. “It also helps that I have a very persuasive bosom and posterior.” 

[blonde-ambition-tour-blog]

Helga stepped back, suddenly dismayed. “I’m sorry. Rules are very important to me when it comes to sex. Only Yes Means Yes,” the Valkyrie said stoutly.

“If you’re not willing to respect other people’s boundaries, at some point you’ll break mine. I’m sorry, Miss Mireille, but I’m just not interested in that.”

[hitwhampire]

Mireille cocked an eyebrow. “I meant it in terms of ‘don’t have sex here’ or ‘underwear not optional’ rules.” She said in a gentle tone before narrowing her eyes. 

“And contrary to the public image of my relatives, I don’t see the need to force someone to lay with me against their will. I may tease, I may arouse by the means I have available, but I don’t force myself on anyone who does not want me. I have no need for that…”

[blonde-ambition-tour-blog]

Helga shook her head. “Third parties didn’t consent to be part of your sex life. It’s fundamentally wrong to do that sort of thing.” She sighed, held her case to her chest, and gave in.

“But I’m not saying no to you in general. Just, not today. So give me a call sometime.” And she passed over her card.

[hitwhampire]

Mireille considered the card, but her eyes were still narrow as she tsk-ed. “I’m not so sure I should. I deal enough with people who judge me or my behavior based on what I was born as.” She said and then turned to move. “I don’t see the need to call for more of that based on less than five minutes of conversation.”

[oblivion-warrior]

Mirielle has entered the Battlefield

[hitwhampire]

“Ooooh, cheeky.” Mireille’s full red lips turned to a seductive smile. “And obviously a connoisseur of fine miches too.” She purred and let her hunger off its leash. Rolling out from her like a wave of thick fog, pure Lust reached for him just as her own body heated up in all the good ways. “Sorry, but I don’t sell out clients who deal in good faith. But if you want to bring a bed in this…” She offered with a meaningful wink of eyes that just showed a gleamy hint of silver in the blue of her irises. He was actually cute enough that riding him to death like a stallion would be preferable to just shooting him. 

“Though I promise, there will be nothing involving kid-gloves there either.”

@oblivion-warrior

[oblivion-warrior]

Jason didn’t give any indication that he noticed the waves of lust she radiated out, though they hit him with all the power of a tsunami, instead merely letting them break upon him as the ocean at a cliff side. They weren’t unlike those of a pair of Raiths he worked with nigh-constantly, though from her it seemed slightly cloying.

Must have been the excess.

He gave a small, knowing smirk, his eyes staring into her’s before trailing down her neck toward her chest as he started slowly, hungrily stepping forward, a man on a mission.

And quick as lightning put the knife hidden up his jacket sleeve to her throat, feeling the barrels as a weight against his chest.

“Listen, honey. I’m tired, I’m sore and I’m in no mood for any of this. All I wanna do is burn this book, go home and sleep with a woman who doesn’t have to use tricks to get a guy in her. Now please. Go home.”

[hitwhampire]

Mireille was about to shoot back a taunt of her own, probably added with a super-strength powered knee to his groin as she noticed the silhouette’s coming down the opening of the alley, moving in a way she distinctively identifies as ‘gun-carrying’.

Great. I hate it when they double book me.

For a moment she just considered using the guy as a meat shield...but on second thought, most of the people who accepted poaching jobs where likely to shoot the competition as well. Merde...

“You know, as much as I’d love to play a game of who can kill each other faster, how about we play ‘who can kill more people’ instead?” She offered with a cocked eyebrow.

[hitwhampire]

Open Starter - On the Range

[hitwhampire]

“And what, pray tell, makes you think I am a rules-abiding person where nudity, nakedness and sex is involved?” her smile took on am imp-ish quality. “It also helps that I have a very persuasive bosom and posterior.” 

[blonde-ambition-tour-blog]

Helga stepped back, suddenly dismayed. “I’m sorry. Rules are very important to me when it comes to sex. Only Yes Means Yes,” the Valkyrie said stoutly.

“If you’re not willing to respect other people’s boundaries, at some point you’ll break mine. I’m sorry, Miss Mireille, but I’m just not interested in that.”

[hitwhampire]

Mireille cocked an eyebrow. “I meant it in terms of ‘don’t have sex here’ or ‘underwear not optional’ rules.” She said in a gentle tone before narrowing her eyes. 

“And contrary to the public image of my relatives, I don’t see the need to force someone to lay with me against their will. I may tease, I may arouse by the means I have available, but I don’t force myself on anyone who does not want me. I have no need for that...”

[non-eadem]

[currentsinbiology]

Someone’s a little cranky.

[shadowxwithachoice]

@tarnishedcoins

[hitwhampire]

Open Starter - On the Range

[hitwhampire]

“Well, in Chicago most ways for me to go wild means there is the chance I’ll end up bumping into cousins.” Mireille had a considering look in her eyes for a moment. “I do know a nice japanese-style bath, which is probably a bit too sedate for them but very relaxing.” Shaking her head sideways, she smirked. “Unless thats too quiet for you?”

[blonde-ambition-tour-blog]

“I’m not saying no,” Helga began, stepping a little closer and winding her arm around Mireille’s waist a little tighter, “but I’m told that at a Japanese bathhouse nakedness is often seen but never observed. And if you’re going to be naked, I intend to be doing a lot of looking.”

[hitwhampire]

“And what, pray tell, makes you think I am a rules-abiding person where nudity, nakedness and sex is involved?” her smile took on am imp-ish quality. “It also helps that I have a very persuasive bosom and posterior.” 

[sidebloggable]

Send me a character + a number and I’ll tell you my headcanons for:

Their physical weak spots

Their emotional/moral weak spots

Scars or painful spots

Best places to kiss on their body

Guilty pleasures

Their vices (physical or emotional)

Their tickle spots

Bad memories/experiences

Humiliating memories

Fears/phobias

Bad or petty habits

Grudges and vendettas

What gets them flustered

Ingrained habits/forces of habit

What it takes to make them cry

Dark secrets/’skeletons in the closet’

Regrets

Things they’ll never admit

People they’ve hurt or indirectly killed, and how it affected them

What-ifs/Alternate Timelines

Turning points in their life

People who’ve influenced them greatly

[lannasroleplaymemes]

Please explain to my Muse why you’re naked.

[hitwhampire]

Open Starter - On the Range

[blonde-ambition-tour-blog]

Helga stepped a little closer under the succubus’ arm, and said, “To be honest, I think recreation with you doesn’t need any of the succubussy. You’re probably plenty fun all on your own. But, you know, a girl likes to be wooed. Shown a good time. Made to feel special.” Her hand slipped around the taller girl’s waist, and she said, “I don’t speak French.”

[hitwhampire]

“I’m french, we’re always fun.” Mireille beamed at her with a mischievous smile. “Any preferences for what kind of fun you’re looking for? Slow fun, wild fun, dirty fun, adrenaline fun…” she then asked with a raised eyebrow. “I mean, we are two hot and well armed woman in a big city. We have all the options…”

Bending down her head a bit, her smile widened for a moment. “And I can teach you some French later, if you want.”

[blonde-ambition-tour-blog]

“I like all types of fun, dear. Why don’t you show me where you like to go when you’re here in Chicago? And maybe we can have a little French conversation along the way.”

[hitwhampire]

“Well, in Chicago most ways for me to go wild means there is the chance I’ll end up bumping into cousins.” Mireille had a considering look in her eyes for a moment. “I do know a nice japanese-style bath, which is probably a bit too sedate for them but very relaxing.” Shaking her head sideways, she smirked. “Unless thats too quiet for you?”

[hitwhampire]

[hitwhampire]

Describe Your OC

1: their voice

2: their smile

3: their greatest achievement

4: their insecurities

5: their shortcomings

6: how they deal with grief

7: how they like to dress

8: what they like to eat

9: their theme

10: their fashion sense

11: their family life

12: their romantic life

13: their embarrassing memory from years ago

14: how they react to burning their tongue on food

15: how they react to a brainfreeze

16: their dreams

17: their ambitions

18: how they sleep

19: their reaction to betrayal

20: their reaction to a mystery love letter

21: how they react to pain

22: what they're like on two hours of sleep

23: how they act when they're sick

24: what motivates them

25: why you enjoy them

[hitwhampire]

Open Starter - On the Range

[blonde-ambition-tour-blog]

Helga stepped a little closer under the succubus’ arm, and said, “To be honest, I think recreation with you doesn’t need any of the succubussy. You’re probably plenty fun all on your own. But, you know, a girl likes to be wooed. Shown a good time. Made to feel special.” Her hand slipped around the taller girl’s waist, and she said, “I don’t speak French.”

[hitwhampire]

“I’m french, we’re always fun.” Mireille beamed at her with a mischievous smile. “Any preferences for what kind of fun you’re looking for? Slow fun, wild fun, dirty fun, adrenaline fun...” she then asked with a raised eyebrow. “I mean, we are two hot and well armed woman in a big city. We have all the options...”

Bending down her head a bit, her smile widened for a moment. “And I can teach you some French later, if you want.”

[hitwhampire]

[text]:A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.

[text] Last time we were drinking the unlabelled bottles from your bosses minibar then.

[hitwhampire]

Texts From Last Night Starters: (SFW version)

[text]: We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out

[text]: I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.

[text]: A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.

[text]: I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.

[text]: When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.

[text]: I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"

[text]: I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.

[text]: According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.

[text]: Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.

[text]: You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.

[text]: I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there

[text]: I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.

[text]: Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.

[text]: Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car

[text]: Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.

[text]: That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.

[sexlessrpmemes]

Reblog if your muse has a kill count of +500