drug addicts deserve housing, food, water, and healthcare btw
occasionally subtle
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@hoahmama
drug addicts deserve housing, food, water, and healthcare btw
i dont care if monday sucks... tuesday cost me sixty bucks... wednesday thursday give no fucks. it's friday im a duck
I love that "Hayden Pike has a crush on Shane Hollander" isn't just a fandom trope, it's genuine textual analysis.
I also love that "Marleau and Ilya have definitely shared women and/or fucked in front of one another" is not even close to being hinted at in canon but we all know it to be true.
@gofish05 Enormous brain thank you, I did need to make this its own post however because I do have thoughts about this, namely:
There is no universe in which Yuna Hollander has not, unfortunately, seen her son-in-law's dick.
Hollanov's sex life is extremely active. This is canonical. Even when they are Going Through It in TLG, they are having sex the entire time. I believe at one point Shane puts it in such a way to imply that they aren't talking except to argue but they ARE fucking. I have said before that I believe they would continue fucking even if they divorced. Knowing this, I believe that several things are true:
1. Yuna becomes slowly aware of just how horny her only child is. This is a fire that everyone must jump into, eventually, with their parents/adult children. After the frying pan of child rearing and childhood comes the flames of knowing each other as adults. For every moment sitting in the kitchen hearing the saddest words ever spoken come out like a confession from the mouth of your grown child (Yuna has many of these moments with both Shane and Ilya) there also comes a moment where you realize that your child is a sexual being. It's spiritual payback for when your child sat down one day after having The Talk and realized that you had to fuck to make them.
2. This is how Yuna, God BLESS her soul, finally figures out that despite loving him more than life itself, she HAS failed Shane in a number of ways, chief among them being that she has never given him enough privacy. And yes it IS seeing the fully erect penis of her son-in-law that does it for her. She has a moment soon after the Cottage when she has barged into Shane's house and she's just popping in! Just seeing how things are going! And at no point did she even think to make sure that it's not one of the few precious days that Ilya could make it up from Boston. She comes around the corner of the entryway and there in the kitchen in full daylight is her son bent over the kitchen table and yes, Ilya has put himself in front of him but Ilya is ALSO naked and--it's there. It's out. And Yuna immediately walks back out the door and crouches on the front porch and tries not to die of embarrassment. And when Shane opens the door to her, bright cherry red almost ten minutes later and not making eye contact, she at first wants to be mad. Because that's her son, and it's broad daylight, and the windows are open, and it seems disrespectful to Shane as a person to just DO THAT to him--
And then she realizes that A. She has no right to think like this because it is Shane's house and Shane's boyfriend and she has no real say over the way those two things combine and B. Shane is an adult. Shane, unfortunately (...fortunately? Yuna has always wanted her child to find love and be cherished) probably wanted EXACTLY what was happening.
These are things that Yuna needed to realize and she will recognize this. But it's suuuuper uncomfy when it happens. And it continues to be uncomfy for awhile! She apologizes to them and things are awkward with them (Moreso with Ilya than Shane, to be honest--the man really does look like he wants to be launched into space) but she's learned her lesson, at least somewhat. There are growing pains yet to come with this whole new dynamic, adding Ilya to the family and everything that comes with it. It's a trial by fire but flowers grow in its wake.
3. Yuna sits up in bed for several hours in the dark and then, very suddenly, turns on the light and leans over David and shakes him awake.
"David."
"Was' happ'nin?"
"David. I really am a little worried. I'm sorry, I just can't stop thinking--David, the--the size? And how often are they--is it healthy? Could it--"
"Yuna. Please go to sleep, hon."
"David--"
"He's an adult, Yuna. I'm sure they're careful. Please stop thinking about it. For all our sakes."
mom's minion memes for real justice
i posted these originally like 9 or 10 years ago or something but I can't find them anywhere, so now you get retortured.
Some art about coffee and certainly nothing else
when I say "you should kill him" and people look at me weird
i know folks are gonna call me a pedo for this one, but i grew up seeing my mom and grandma naked. they had health issues and at times needed care and help showering. and i truly think more kids need to be shown the nonsexual reality of naked women at a young age. there is nothing sexual about my grandmothers breasts, they were simply body parts. more women die of heart attacks because people are too afraid of breasts to do real chest compressions, because they are scared to touch their breasts. the sexualization of our bodies literally kills us. i need people to be more normal about naked bodies and i'm 100% serious.
I grew up also seeing my mom, aunt, and grandma naked. My dad, step dad, and brother walked around with only boxers around the house frequently. And i have to say I completely agree. Not only is a naked body not literally anything but a naked body to me, but it's allowed me to be comfortable with my naked body too, which is something I realized a lot of my peers didn't have once I went to college.
A lot of us are uncomfortable in our bodies which is a whole other conversation for beauty standards and everything else; but I seriously think that some of that would be less of a problem if non-sexualized nudity was more common in people's upbringing. It is a way of growing up (in my opinion and experience) that has allowed me to just be like "yeah everyone has a body and everyone's looks different" because its also easier to not compare how our bodies are "supposed" to look from models and online media when you've been surrounded by normal bodies your whole life.
We all have a body, and it's not sexual to have one because existence as a person is not sexual!!
hour 1 of shift: i love helping people and making people happy yay yay yay later today i am gonna go home and have fun and eat a tasty meal and work on my projects and
hour 6: if youu go to the store and buy groceriers you are a piece of shit
hour 8: if i wad 1 apples tall i could live off of one apple for a week... oh but it would rot away... no.... i hate the rot i hate the apple
Much like the rest of the fandom I am obsessed with the nickname Shanebug. Thank you to whoever created it, I love you!
I like to think that Shane was given the nickname by David. When he was a toddler Shane was obsessed with any and every type of bug. He’d make David and Yuna take him in the garden all the time to dig for worms or look at the flowers to see if there were any bees. But his absolute favourite were ladybugs leading David to coin the nickname Shanebug.
Obviously once hockey took over his life Shane kind of forgot about his bug obsession. But once he gets settled living in Ottawa with Ilya he starts to pick it back up.
When Shane and Ilya went round to his parents for dinner he offhandedly mentioned that he was planning on adding some plants to the garden so more insects and bugs would visit. And David goes suddenly silent and starts to get teary.
David: Oh Shanebug is back
Ilya: Shanebug, what is a Shanebug?
This leads to Yuna getting out all Shane’s toddler pictures showcasing him holding a ladybug in his hands, him covered in mud pointing at a worm with the biggest grin on his face and him cross eyed as a butterfly lands on his nose. Ilya’s favourite though is a photo of Shane dressed up as a ladybug for his third birthday, antennas and all, that he gushes over.
Ilya is so besotted by the idea of Shanebug that he orders a gazillion different types of flowers and plants to give his husband the bug haven of his dreams (just as long as there are no spiders).
One like nitpick thing that drives me crazy is when people call Blue Whales the largest whales or the largest living mammals or some shit like that
Because yes that is true. But when you frame it like that you are completely disregarding the absolutely batshit reality that Blue Whales are the largest animals that have ever existed on earth through the entire history of the planet and they are alive right now today
God sometimes I'm writing smut and I'll like, delete a sentence because I'm like, no, I can't write that. It's too indulgent. And then it's like. Girl, what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins. Get real.
"what the fuck are you even going to the candy store for if you're just going to buy raisins" is honestly the thing I needed to hear today
Truly you know what movies would fuck Hollanov up? Both Inside Outs. Goddamn they would be a mess. Depression, anxiety, and ice hockey. They'd lie awake thinking about those movies for months.
> turns on my computer
> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default
> opens my email
> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default
> launches a software
> disables a new AI fea
I heard another video game is coming out soon
this has to stop
saw a post that said shane is the most Boy to ever boy and i love that so much. he is so Boy.
and now i’m thinking about how he loves to be romantic and chivalrous to ilya— like when they get to the cottage and shane carries ilya’s bag in. he’s a great Boyfriend(husband.) he holds the door for ilya every chance he gets, and ilya (not so) secretly Looooooves it. when they’re at the bar with their team, shane will ask ilya if he wants a drink and go get it for him, hands it off to ilya with a little here you go, baby and then sits at a stool at the bar and ilya leans back between shane’s legs. at team cookouts, shane will tug on ilya’s arm as he’s talking to people until he’s sitting in his lap and ilya will go willingly without even pausing his conversation. shane will grin and wrap his arms around ilya’s stomach, kiss his shoulder. when they’re out to dinner and the bill comes shane will put his card down and ilya will make it a big thing, like oh thank you shane you’re sooo sweet and shane will be like ah it’s no trouble baby (they have a shared bank account.) he loves taking care of his baby!!!!!!! there’s been a rare time or two where shane and ilya are at a club and shane will let go and have a few drinks, get wonderfully tipsy and ilya will drag him out to dance. shane will hold ilya’s hips as ilya dances against him.
this doesn’t really connect to shane is such a Boy. anyway shane is such a Boy who loves taking care of his ilya