Mate, youāve got a chubby lizard on your dashboard
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Not today Justin
YOU ARE THE REASON
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Cosmic Funnies

Janaina Medeiros

Discoholic šŖ©
Misplaced Lens Cap
ojovivo

ē„ę„ / Permanent Vacation
occasionally subtle
Sade Olutola

JVL
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

ā

Andulka

izzy's playlists!
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

#extradirty
Cosimo Galluzzi

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@holdingonforheaven
Mate, youāve got a chubby lizard on your dashboard
warm bread with butter. reblog if you Agree
the latest old man fic is going really well for me and really badly for these two
he's beautiful i literally need to put him under extreme psychological stress. i need to put him in extreme physical pain. i need him curling up in someone's arms for the feelings of safety and comfort he hasn't received in ages
one of the few joys in my life right now is the pwhl youtube live chat during the we just getting started hype ad going absolutely apeshit on the pride emojis because the auto generated closed captions said gay time instead of game time and everyone collectively ran with it
It's spring now which means the kids in my city have started drawing hopscotches on the sidewalk and as a rule I do every hopscotch I see because 1. Use it or lose it (ability to scotch) and 2. If a child got down on the hardscrabble streets of Boston Massachusetts to draw a scotch the least I can do is use it, but in doing the hopscotches, I've learned that about 50% of them are the typical 8-10 step scotch and the other 50% are. Somewhat avant-garde. And of course I'm not vetting the entire scotch before I start it so sometimes it's like haha 8 steps woo! Childlike whimsy! And sometimes they're 20 steps or 30 or they've got a section with three squares instead of two where you have to do a little Charleston to step on all three, or, memorably, FORTY one foot squares. A full BLOCK of jumping on one foot but I'm no quitter so once I've started Jigsaw Junior's fuckin hopscotch gauntlet I'm there til the end just a daily pot smoker in her thirties jumping kasa-obake style through an affluent suburb while some little proto-kennedy watches from his bedroom window rubbing his sadistic little third grade hands together and cackling. It's amazing. I love spring.
Happy Leland Melvin Day!!!
Happy Leland Melvin Day!
Happy Leland Melvin Day!
Happy Leland Melvin Day!!!
Happy Leland Melvin Day!!!!
what a good morning!! im gonna draw a dog!!
apRIL FOOLS I DREW TWO DOGS THEYāRE BEST FRIENDS
APRIL FOOLS :D
A year or so ago I went to wood carving club with a bruised eye from my dog slamming his nose into my eyesocket and like every old lady there pulled me aside at some point to ask if my partner hit me here are some of the solutions they had in case he did.
-Replacing his vitimens with poision
- getting her brother to invite him out onto his boat and then killing him and dumping him in the ocean and saying he got drunk and fell off.
- get tboned with him in the passenger seat and then once he was in the hospital theres all kinds of easy ways to kill him like not washing my hands after a poop and then touching his wound casually.
-replacing his drink of choice with moonshine!?
- take him on a hike thats locally notorious for a rapid otter attacking hikers and once he had rabies I could just kill him any ol way and say self defense.
-One lady just cheerfully informed me she had a gun and only a few years left anyway
Accurate tags:
#and this is why no-fault divorce brings down the murder rate
dog owners: She is a first generation merle doodle! She cost $6,000 and I had to drive 3 states over to pick her up!
cat owners: this thing entered my house and refused to leave
This is so real cuz I literally got my cat at a deli
ordered a side of pickles and they accidentally included a kitten in your bag instead Iām assuming
Actually thatās pretty close to the real storyā they were just handing them out cuz the deli cat had a litter and they didnāt know what to do with them so me and my sister just took her home with our ice cream
awesome promotional deal
canāt wait for our new friends in the fandom to experience the horrors of playoffs <3
I always say that the thing which sets Sargent apart as a portrait artist is that he draws/paints literally every subject - no matter their gender, social position, life vs representational drawing etc - like he is right that minute realising he's desperately in love with them. And it rules every single time.
Examples pulled just from his Wikipedia page most popular works. Absolutely devastating scenes for bisexuals for over a century
Don't forget the ALLIGATORS. He loves them too.
If a fantasy world has an ancient tree of wisdom, that means it must also have young trees that are dumb as shit. Just giving terrible advice like, "the evil wizard is kinda hot"'
okay. rude.
come to my cottage where thereās no slamming doors and we donāt walk on eggshells and you donāt have to think about how as a child you memorized the sounds of footsteps on the hardwood and who they belonged to and how much to shrink yourself depending on the answer. donāt go back to russia because you always come back to me in pieces and pretend you donāt need to be put back together. i know a place that wonāt break you. come to my house. weāll have so much fun. i want to watch tv with you. i want to knock elbows with you while we brush our teeth. i want to taste your mouth while its still warm from your coffee; to suck syrup off your fingers at the table. i want every mundane luxury weāve never allowed ourselves to have. itās so private, no one will know. because they canāt. and for now itās okay; iām not ready for the world to have us when thereās so many ways iāve yet to have you. weād have a week, or even two, and it still wonāt be enough. how do you make up for almost ten years of never seeing a sunrise together. never kissing with morning breath. all the things i might already know if i never left that time you asked me to stay. weāll be completely alone, together, with our clothes in the same laundry basket and your hair on my pillowcase and the enormity of everything i want touching every corner of every room.
in my high school a few years ahead of me there was a polyamorous girl named luna who was dating a guy and a girl and the girl was named (i swear to god this is her birth name) marea. they were named moon and tide and they were lesbian lovers. i thought it was the most romantic fated thing ever as a tiny baby queer it would make me sigh in adoration. the boyfriend's name was frank