I am slowly losing myself

24 || she/her || bibliophile || whump stories & prompts

[honeybunny-og]

hi i write whump sometimes

Hi, I’m honeybunny the og. You can call me Honey, or Bunny, or Charles. She/her. 

I want to use this blog to get in the habit of writing more, whether it be developing prompts, short stories, or longer OC stories (which I’ll probably post on AO3 too). All of my writing will be tagged #my writing and #honeybunny og

I’m pretty new to whump tumblr but I’ve always been into fucked up stories with dark themes and characters with questionable moralities. 

I’m also a really avid reader so if you need any classic book recs hit me up lol. 

So in regards to whump, I’m really into:

psychological whump

defiant whumpees (who then get broken)

medical whump

hero/villain whump

captivity whump

non-human whumpers (vampires, monsters, etc.)

dehumanization whump

pet whump

intimate whumpers

caregivers x whumpees

corrupted whumpee (whumpee turns into a whumper)

caregivers getting whumped 

possessive whumpers

whumpees getting triggered/dealing with their trauma

*~*knives*~* 

dub-con/non-con touching (nonsexual but maybe sometimes sexual*)

*any stories with dub-con/non-con sexual content will have plenty of warnings and will probably be rare/easily avoidable

Okay so that’s all I can think of right now lol. Thanks for reading, um hit me up if you wanna be whump friends <3 lol ok bye

[luna-azzurra]

SOFT HOURS PROMPTS!!!

⟢ "You ever get tired of being strong? Because I'm tired. I'm really, really tired."

⟢ "It's late and I can't sleep and I keep thinking about every version of my life where things went differently."

⟢ "I'm fine. I've just been fine for so long that I forgot what actually good feels like."

⟢ "Nobody checked on me today. I don't know why that hit so hard tonight."

⟢ "I think I've been disappearing slowly and nobody noticed and I'm not even sure I minded."

⟢ "Can you just stay on the phone? You don't have to say anything. I just don't want to be alone with my brain right now."

⟢ "I cried in the car again. That's my third time this week. I'm fine though."

⟢ "I keep telling myself I'll feel better when. And the when keeps moving."

⟢ "Some nights I just need someone to ask how I actually am. Not the how are you that expects fine back."

⟢ "I'm not sad about anything specific. It's more like everything at once, all the time, very quietly."

⟢ "I forgot to eat again. Not on purpose. I just got lost somewhere inside my own head and the day disappeared."

⟢ "I don't want to talk about it. I just want to sit next to someone who knows something's wrong."

⟢ "Do you ever feel like you're performing being okay and you've been doing it so long you've forgotten what the real thing looks like?"

⟢ "I'm homesick for something I can't name. A feeling, maybe. A time. I don't know."

⟢ "I put on a brave face so automatically now I don't even notice I'm doing it."

⟢ "Some days I miss people who are still alive. That's the loneliest kind of missing."

⟢ "I think I've been grieving something for years without knowing what it is."

⟢ "I'm not looking for advice. I just need someone to say yeah, that's hard. That's genuinely hard."

⟢ "I keep waiting for the version of my life that feels like mine."

⟢ "There are people in my life who love me and I still feel completely alone and I don't know what to do with that."

⟢ "I think I've been running on empty so long I forgot what full felt like."

⟢ "Tell me it gets better and mean it. Don't just say it. Mean it."

⟢ "I had a dream it was okay. All of it. And waking up was the hardest thing I've done in a while."

⟢ "I just need one day where nothing is required of me. Not one single thing."

⟢ "I smiled all day and now I'm home and I don't have the energy to even pretend anymore."

⟢ "I think I've been trying to outrun something that's been inside me the whole time."

⟢ "The silence is different at night. Heavier. Like it has something to say."

⟢ "I'm not drowning. It's more like treading water for so long my arms are giving out."

⟢ "I wish I could explain it. It's not one thing. It's every small thing, stacked."

⟢ "I keep meaning to call you. It's been six months. I keep meaning to."

⟢ "I'm tired of being the one who holds it together. Just once I want someone to hold it together for me."

⟢ "Everything is technically fine. That's the most honest answer I have right now."

⟢ "I dissociated through most of today. Came back around 9pm. Don't really know where I went."

⟢ "I get this feeling sometimes like I'm watching my own life through glass."

⟢ "I think the loneliness has just become part of my personality at this point."

⟢ "I made tea and sat in the dark for an hour. I'm okay. I think I'm okay."

⟢ "I don't need someone to save me. I just need someone to notice I need saving."

⟢ "There's a sadness in me that doesn't have an origin story. It's just always been there."

⟢ "I keep apologizing for taking up space and I don't know when I started doing that."

⟢ "I cried at a song today and I couldn't even tell you why. It just opened something up."

⟢ "I'm starting to think being understood is the rarest thing in the world."

⟢ "I've been so busy surviving I haven't had time to figure out if I'm actually living."

⟢ "I'm okay when I'm around people. It's the coming home to quiet that gets me."

⟢ "I think what I actually need is just for someone to look at me and get it without me having to explain."

⟢ "I almost reached out to you last night. Almost. Old habits."

⟢ "I don't know who I am outside of who I am for other people. That thought keeps me up."

⟢ "It's not depression. It's more like everything is slightly grey and slightly muffled. All the time."

⟢ "I forgot what it feels like to look forward to something."

⟢ "Some people make the world feel smaller and safer just by existing in it. I miss having one of those people."

⟢ "I'm not angry at anyone. I'm just carrying so much and I've been carrying it alone for so long."

⟢ "I keep thinking about a version of me that didn't get so lost somewhere along the way."

⟢ "The days are fine. It's the nights that have opinions."

⟢ "I want someone to ask how I'm sleeping. Nobody ever asks how I'm sleeping."

⟢ "I don't know how to ask for help. I never learned how. So I just don't."

⟢ "I've been holding my breath for so long I forgot breathing was supposed to feel easy."

⟢ "I'm not broken. I'm just worn. There's a difference and most days I have to remind myself of it."

⟢ "I think I needed to hear that I'm doing okay. Even from myself. Especially from myself."

⟢ "Some nights I write things down just so they exist somewhere outside my head."

⟢ "I keep looking for the moment things started going wrong and I can't find a single one. Just a slow drift."

⟢ "I want to feel like myself again. I just can't remember exactly who that was."

⟢ "I'm not looking for a solution. I just needed to say it out loud to someone."

⟢ "I've been kind to everyone today. I have nothing left for myself."

⟢ "My body is exhausted. My brain won't stop. We're not working together very well lately."

⟢ "I think I've been grieving the future I thought I was going to have."

⟢ "I need to cry but I can't. It's just sitting there behind my eyes going nowhere."

⟢ "I think what scares me most is that I've gotten good at this. At being okay when I'm not."

⟢ "There's nothing wrong exactly. There's just also nothing right."

⟢ "I keep waiting to feel like I've arrived somewhere. Like I'll know when I get there. I don't know where there is."

⟢ "Some days I need someone to be gentle with me. I don't always know how to ask."

⟢ "I miss feeling safe. Not from anything specific. Just. Safe."

⟢ "I'm writing this at 2am because the thoughts are louder at 2am."

⟢ "I think I've been lonely in a way I don't have words for."

⟢ "Tell me something good. Anything. I just need to hear something good."

⟢ "I don't need much. I just need to know I'm not completely invisible."

⟢ "I want to be okay. I'm working on it. I just wanted someone to know I'm working on it."

⟢ "The hardest part isn't feeling it. The hardest part is feeling it quietly so nobody worries."

⟢ "I think I forgot how to rest. Like genuinely rest, not just stop moving."

⟢ "I'm sitting outside just listening. Sometimes the world being loud helps when my head is louder."

⟢ "There's a kindness I've been waiting for that I think I need to start giving myself."

⟢ "I don't always need you to understand. Sometimes I just need you to try."

⟢ "It's a weird grief, missing something you never had. Missing who you might've been."

⟢ "I think I've been surviving on autopilot. I want to actually be here for a while."

⟢ "This is the most honest I've been with anyone in months. Maybe longer."

⟢ "I'm going to be okay. I genuinely believe that. I just need tonight to not be okay first."

⟢ "I think I just needed to say all of that to someone who wasn't going to try to fix it."

⟢ "Be patient with me. I'm trying to find my way back to myself."

⟢ "The world didn't end today. Some days that really is the best I've got."

[bishops-severed-torso]

[aspen-kitsune]

Why am I like this

[heartlesslywhumping]

Whump Prompt #116

“You don’t get to surrender. You lose when I say you lose, you win when I say you win, you die when I say you die. I haven’t said you can die yet. Pick your weapon up”

[honeybunny-og]

outlining a book rn and i can’t decide if i should make a lesbian b-plot or not tbh.

i’m leaning lesbian but idk if it should just not have romance between the two main femme characters or if it should be lesbian

[some-messed-up-writing-for-you]

Dang you been horny lately

Anon, anon..., anon.

In this house we are ALWAYS horny.

[bandits-whump-collection]

Something about custom-made restraints. It's so premeditated, or been going on so long that they were crafted or commissioned.

Falconry hoods instead of blindfolds, perfectly stitched to curve around every angle of Whumpee's head, accounting for traits like ears, horns, fins. It leaves them so vulnerable, but it's so perfect for them that they can't get it off, no amount of whipping their head around sends it sailing, and no amount of scrabbling helps.

That is, if their limbs aren't bound. Custom shackles, whether it be metal, leather, or something else, designed with a chain the perfect length just to restrain them to the right degree. Wings shackled to a point just before becoming flight capable, but allowing stretching, feet left tied together just enough to allow comfortable walking, but trips them to run.

[honeybunny-og]

been very into monsters recently.

like imagine some beastly creature kidnapping a lil human as a pet.

the human thinks they’re about to be eaten at all times, not understanding that the monster put them in a cage bc they’re basically a pet hamster to them.

of course the monster keeps accidentally hurting them bc they’re not used to such a fragile being. Why doesn’t their pet like roughhousing? or play biting? they’re only leaving a bruise, not drawing any blood!

Maybe their pet needs another friend to keep them company~

[honeybunny-og]

“Hey! You still alive?”

*bashes back of head so hard their face slams into the table, crushing their nose*

“Well, looks like you’ve got enough life left in you to bleed.”

[romcommunist]

if u think im annoying now wait until i get over my fear of being perceived as annoying

[mysterious-secret-garden]

Witches - William Mortensen.

[transxfiles]

you may notice i use the phrase "my beloved" frequently. this is because i am in love with the world and everything in it. hope this clears things up <3

[transxfiles]

girl help the pessimists found me

[phoenixichi]

"girl help i am staunchly refusing to realise my own naivete in a world almost completely made up of things that couldnt care less about me or are actively exploiting me"

[tiefling-enjoyer]

[that-house]

Girl help the pessimists are mistaking an inherently meaningless universe for an inhumane and joyless one rather than recognizing the opportunity to make one’s own meaning and joy and to spread those things to others

[susiequaz12]

CW: dehumanized whumpee, medical whump, gore maybe? (It’s not descriptive but some things are mentioned briefly), ‘it’ as a pronoun, blood.

“Hey, it’s crying again.”

“Again? Really? Is it doing that weird thing it does where it’s just kind of staring?”

The doctor nodded, glancing to the corner of the room where it was huddled. Their eyes were hollow. Tears streamed in thick tracks down the sides of their face, but it was completely silent.

It lied on their side, back against the wall, naked skin stained with blood and bruises- not an inch left untouched.

“I mean, considering we took it’s tongue last week, it’ll probably be a few more days before it’ll speak again.” The doctor explained.

“Isn’t that longer than usual? You predicted it’d only be a few days to grow back?” Nurse asked.

The figure against the wall took in a shuddering breath, pulling it’s hands closer to their chest. Blood was pooling slowly around them and they shivered.

The nurse finished packing up the fingers as they were instructed and wrote down their notes in their notebook.

“It’s just getting slower. We haven’t reached it’s limit yet, but it’ll be fine.” Doctor stated, as they moved to squat down in front of their subject.

The empty eyes stared across the room as the figure continued to cry, refusing to utter a sound. They flinched as a hand was grabbed and pulled away from their chest- but they did not look at the doctor.

“It’s already started the process and it’s only been what, an hour?”

Nurse checked their watch. “About forty-five minutes.”

The doctor finished inspecting the hand and wiped the blood off on their lab coat. “There we go, it’ll be just fine.”

Nurse couldn’t help but dart their eyes over to the shaking figure, the limp and bloody form that somehow was still breathing.

“Do you think-“ they took a breath, trying to compose their thoughts. “-Do you think the process would be sped up if they were- if it was in better condition?”

“Nurse, what are you implying?” Doctor took a calm step towards them, hands in their pockets casually as they leaned across from the other side of the table. The nurse avoided their gaze.

“Simply that we could, bandage the wounds- clean it up a little- that’s all. We don’t need to feed them or anything, but I fear letting it’s conditions get worse could- could tamper with the experiments.”

“Hmm.” The doctor began to nod, glancing as if they were studying their notes. “Are you suggesting that I’d let anything tamper with my experiments?”

“No I- it’s just, I think it’s a little cruel.”

Doctor let out a laugh, grabbing their clipboard and papers from the table.

“It’s whole existence is cruel darling.” They gave nurse a pat on the cheek, leaving a smear of blood behind. Standing in the doorway, Doctor turned back to look at the crying figure. “Play bath time if you wish. It won’t make a difference anyways.”

Nurse finally let out a breath once the doctor had left the room. They grabbed a rag and filled a bucket with water, along with collecting a couple rolls of bandages and gauze. Painkillers would be out of the question- they’d already learned any drugs were ineffective- but at least they wouldn’t be lying in their own blood.

As the nurse approached the figure, holding out the roll of bandages, the tears finally stopped. And for the first time in hours, there was a semblance of life behind those eyes.

[shhhhimwatchingthis]

You want to know why Inigo Montoya remains such an iconic and beloved character even 35 years after the Princess Bride came out?

It's because he's one of the few characters in fiction who has a story where he has dedicated his life to revenge, his whole motivation is about getting revenge....and he gets it! and then he isn't empty or despairing! he doesn't regret it! he's totally satisfied!

because so many stories about revenge or rage are about characters "seeing the futility of their actions" or learning "their desire for revenge has only made them the monsters they hated" FUCK THAT.

Inigo Montoya kills the man who kills his father, is allowed to live in the narrative after and be happy about it and it is so satisfying. it's fantastic. it's iconic.

let more characters rage against the world, bring it down with bloodied hands, and let them be FUCKING RIGHT about it. Let them celebrate their success with sharp grins, and let them live happy, full lives where they always remain proud/fulfilled for what they've done

[abyssaldyke]

*to myself, through gritted teeth* the things you hate about your work are the things that make it yours. you cannot remove them. nothing you make can exist without them. a better writer is never going to write this book. the only one writing it is you.

[deergirlegodeath]

the most annoying people are the ones who just reply "no 💖" to recovery/self-improvement posts

[deergirlegodeath]

THE WET BOX

[deergirlegodeath]

ill never forgive you guys for reblogging the version without the wet box addition now there's edgelords in my notes and nobody gets to hear about the wet box

[orpheuslament]

i hate you booktok i hate you overly organised bookshelves i hate you hard cover supremacists i hate you reading challenges i hate you colleen hoover i hate you people who can only seem to read ya or romance i hate you same style of cover in every modern book i hate you rupi kaur i hate you plain boring prose i hate you buying books just for the "aesthetic" i love you pretentiousness i love you being a snob