hostilelamb

[johnnysilverhandssuitcasenuke]

[catchymemes]

[angel-derangement]

they put pussy in the water supply to keep the lesbians healthy

ⓘ Fact Check

There are currently no jurisdictions worldwide that mandate the addition of pussy to drinking water, nor have any clinical trials shown that the addition of pussy to drinking water has any significant effect on the heath of lesbians.

For more information on Tumblr Fact Check or to report inaccuracy, please see our reports page.

[angel-derangement]

idk why but they buried the option to turn this feature off - but you can find it if you go to the FAQ.

[tforthetea]

WHY DID THEY NEED TO CLAIRIFY THAT

[phyrexian-lootbug]

Tumblr has fact checking?

[tforthetea]

apparently???

[angel-derangement]

yeah it’s new :/ they announced it on the staff blog here

[idkwhatthisisbutheresdcandstuff]

HUH?????

Why did I find this out in a shit post about pussy and lesbians?????

[angel-derangement]

have you got notifications on for announcements? you can find the setting here if not

[emilynyaaa]

@salmaciansalix

[girlstinkgood]

The pervert lesbian vintage board game collector has prepared a rigged copy of Twister and mentioned she hasn't showered this week

[isoli-indivi]

The pervert lesbian vintage boardgame collector insists the original rulebook for Twister mandates all players remove their socks and shoes before stepping on the mat

[villainessbian]

Not to derail the post but how can twister be rigged? Isn't it just a mat with colours?

[seraphina-aureline]

wouldn't you like to know~

[villainessbian]

Yes? I would? I'm confused

[neafotia]

The only way I can think to rig it would be to somehow force what color/limb is done on a given round.

[girlstinkgood]

I can explain: I have no idea how Twister actually works

[girlfromcomputer]

The pervert lesbian vintage board game collector has prepared a copy of twister and is going to spin the spinner and call out the results perfectly honestly while she watches her two friends tie themselves into knots around each other.

[mumadenpasyndrome]

Okay okay yes yes that's the plan but to rig twister I suspect either a shitty and predictable spinner that the pervert lesbian vintage board game collector can use to easily choose what's next or instead of a spinner it uses a card drawing system which can be significantly easier to cheat with

[itseasytoremember]

So this one time I was in a hospital recovering from an emergency surgery on my leg, and had to be there long enough that they had to change my bedding, so, doped up on three kinds of pain meds and antibiotics my dad wheels me into the hallway while the nurses work.

"dad" I say, my eyes barely open "it's Colonel Sanders" while pointing down the hallway. He looks, and at the end of the hallway, there's a portrait of an old man, the donor who paid for the wing of the hospital I'm recovering in.

My dad explains as much to me, and goes "I mean the guy *kinda* looks like him, but why would Colonel Sanders pay for a hospital wing Mississauga Ontario? I think those drugs might me messing with you"

Then the nurse comes out of the room. I go "hey, who is that picture of?"

She looks at the portrait. She looks at me. She looks at my dad. She looks at the painting. She looks at me again.

"you don't recognize the Colonel??"

[cheeseanonioncrisps]

Honestly bizarre that tomatoes get all the flack for “not being a vegetable” because they're technically a fruit when:

A) There are a ton of fruits that get categorised as vegetables. Like this also applies to pumpkins, squashes and cucumbers.

B) The fucking mushrooms are standing there at the back of the crowd in this witch trial, trying to look inconspicuous because they somehow got into the vegetable club with no fucking controversy despite the fact that they're not even plants.

[mortimermcmirestinks]

"technically tomatoes are fruits--" THAT MUSHROOM OVER THERE IS MORE CLOSELY RELATED TO A FUCKING SHIH TZU THAN IT IS TO LITERALLY ANY PLANT

[teaboot]

@mortimermcmirestinks

[mortimermcmirestinks]

IS THAT FANART?

[teaboot]

it’s a warning

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

This phrase has already entered my vocabulary re: media criticism where like. The viewer has a concrete view of what they expect a story to be based on the tropes and cliches they're used to seeing together, and when that doesn't happen, they judge it as a failed depiction of what they assumed it was going to be instead of judging it as what it actually is.

"This show is problematic because the hero didn't kill the villain at the end": When does he steal the bread?

"These two characters who were close friends throughout the series don't kiss at the end! What the fuck?": When does he steal the bread?

"This feels like it's missing a conclusion! Like, the protagonist does bad stuff and because of a critical decision he makes as a result of his major character flaws, meets tragedy in the end! Where's the part where he learns better and brings is love back from the dead and becomes a good guy and gets a happy ending?": When does he steal the fucking bread??

[thetetra]

I heard this out as "When criticizing something, you must judge it for what it is, not what it isn't"

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#this is why so many of us urge people to get a wider diet of stories

[wheelie-sick]

sometimes people experiencing psychosis and/or mania will come up to you on the street and talk in confusing or upsetting ways. your job is to either have a regular human-to-human conversation with that person or politely leave. your job is not to call 911. do not call 911. you might kill that person if you call 911.

[wheelie-sick]

I don't even have the energy to screenshot and respond to your tags- what the actual fuck is wrong with you? "the cops are scared and rightfully so" "mental health calls are the scariest for cops" OH so this isn't about the safety of psychotic & manic people this is about piggy feelings?

and no, actually, this is not USA specific and no, actually, people from other countries should not ignore this post. police violence and sanism weren't invented in the US and they are certainly not unique to here. if you (or anyone) thinks that this bullshit doesn't happen elsewhere then you are not listening.

[headspace-hotel]

cops r Some Guy with a Gun

do we want Some Guy with a Gun in this situation? answer is usually "NO"

[uncivilliberties]

This is legitimately useful reframing. A while ago I started replacing the word "cop" in my vocabulary with "a man with a gun." It really puts things into perspective.

This homeless person is making me uncomfortable. Should I call [a man with a gun]?

My neighbor is having a loud party. Should I get [a man with a gun] involved?

There are some teenagers skateboarding. Do you think [a man with a gun] would get rid of them for me?

It makes it very clear what you're saying. I can call a man with a gun to threaten or hurt someone mildly inconveniencing me. You're not calling the cops, you're calling A MAN WITH A GUN into a situation that does not warrant a firearm handled by a volatile lunatic who will not be held accountable for his actions.

[headspace-hotel]

^ ^ ^

[depsidase]

[rorbison]

Comedians in the '70s and cartoons in the '90s: weird how your kids can watch violence and murder on TV but the FCC wants us dead if we say the word nipple.

Internet users in 2025: you didn't warn me that there would be erotic themes in the game you just mentioned which is fucked up because I thought it was going to be a normal "morally struggle with killing people" game but now it's gone too far :-/

[rorbison]

A lot of you are playing into a lot more reactionary of hands than I think you would like when you act like tits are more shocking than gun violence.

[rorbison]

We need to call people posers again. We gotta. We just gotta. No you aren't a countercultural weirdo because you made a battle jacket, you get tangibly viscerally uncomfortable if someone is breast feeding in public and that is incredibly square of you.

[itsblosseybitch]

Made a new poster! :)

[zwoelffarben]

[jack-the-fool]

Rocky: Grace say Hail Mary archives have all Human media yet Rocky still cannot find classic film Goncharov for movie night statment.

Grace: ....What?

Rocky: Grace not know own earth greatest mafia movie ever made question?

Grace: .......

Grace: What?

[tahthetrickster]

me: i have a very specific tumblr accent meme im thinking of that surely i should be able to pull up by searching the text in the meme

the most dogshit useless decimated search engine in the entire world:

[poetstudyblr-deactivated2025063]

Nothing is off topic when it comes to us, happy pride month, my fellow asexuals 💜

[abyssfmpfikvp6]

coughs

[lgbtqiatext]

[scruffylookingpiratecaptain]

I think people have truly lost any ability to be patient with storytelling.

‘I don’t understand this’ They’ll explain it if you wait.

‘I don’t like how this episode left things hanging’ There’s a continuation next week.

‘This character is flat’ Wait for them to be fleshed out.

So many of the complaints I see about shows lately are people being confused by things THAT THE SHOW WANTS YOU TO BE CONFUSED BY THATS THE FUN OF MYSTERY AND FORESHADOWING YOU ABSOLUTE GOBLINS THE MAIN CHARACTER IS ALSO CONFUSED AND THEYRE GONNA DO A BIG REVEAL AND EXPLANATION LATER IF YOU WOULD JUST FUCKING WAIT

[hooray4skeleton]

[beardedmrbean]