bonus:
After I had a doctor ruin my health, cost me years of my life, and nearly kill me by missing the diagnosis of a tumor which was compressing my spinal cord, I learned this script:
“I’m not here to talk about my weight; I’m here to talk about [problem]. I have a history of doctors focusing on my weight and ignoring problems like ‘a tumor in my spine,’ so I’m sure you’ll understand why I would prefer we did not ignore my stated complaint to focus on my weight instead.”
“I would like to focus on the complaint that brought me in today, which is [complaint], not my weight.”
“What tests or course of treatment would you recommend to a thin person presenting with my symptoms? Why are we not doing that? I would prefer to proceed with those tests and that course of treatment.”
“Please write in my chart that I asked you for these tests and course of treatment that you would give a thin patient with my symptoms, and you declined.”
“I’d like to request a copy of my visit notes from today,” [if the above don’t work and you don’t have MyChart, “what’s the correct email for my written request?”
It may be difficult to insist on a patient advocate to be in the room with you, but in many states you are legally entitled to one. I bring one of my partners bc I have medical-triggered PTSD. They know how to advocate for me or support me if a doctor tries to steamroll me..
If you are in a hospital situation and cannot get an official advocate in the room with you, ask for a chaplain. Chaplains are used to being in a room to comfort and help patients and in many circumstances, just having a witness in the room will change a doctor’s tune REALLY fast.
Medical fatphobia is a big problem, and it really heavily affects but is not restricted to people that doctors perceive to be women (whether or not those people are women). Don’t let yourself be bullied!
Excellent scripts and advice!
Having a witness present is a truly excellent tip. Recently, someone I love was subjected to weight-based abuse by a doctor whose “pet project” was “helping” people lose weight by harassing them for most of the visit and recommending dangerous practices like fasting and fad diet websites. At a follow-up visit there was a nurse present, and the appointment got *real* professional *real* fast.
