stuck in time

general tw for trauma, mental illness and dissociation. dx with did, pdnos, arfid and some others. not a minor. dni if untraumatized. everything is ok to rb.

[http-trauma]

this is a vent blog. general TW for the following:

trauma - child abuse (+csa/csem) - dissociation - mental health

please dni if the following applies to you:

cluster B ableist - ritual/satanic abuse denier - anti self-dx

make light of cults - romanticizes trauma - ddlg/kink blogs

endogenics and those who support endogenics systems

endorse or support harry potter/jk rowling content in any form

usual dni for racists, transphobes, misogynists, conservatives, exclusionists, classists, ableists, sanists, terfs&swerfs, PEAR/MAPs, pro-shippers, bootlickers, general assholes, etc etc.

minors can follow, but please be aware that the body's age is 25, and there may be slightly nsfw posts from time to time (always tagged properly)!

[toss-a-coin-to-your-stan-account]

"do it scared" this "do it tired" that. well no one ever talks about the fucking insurmountable "do it with greasy hair"

[catilinas]

you should be able to wash your hair and it stays washed. what do you mean i have to do it again

[t4tvampireisms]

Not that Renee Nicole Good doesn’t deserve justice, because every person murdered by the state deserves that, and more; but that’s exactly my point. It’s not lost on me that most of the general public only started to care about the public executions and kidnappings of citizens when a white woman was revealed to be the victim.

[t4tvampireisms]

I also personally don’t care for her death being compared to George Floyd’s. Especially since Black children like me were mocked and harassed in school for even remotely caring about his murder, while for the most part people take Renee’s death seriously.

[changelingcoded]

im sure thats normal

[unstablemotions]

one very horrible thing about being abused by someone you're related to is that you might look like them. maybe you have their nose. their smile. their hair. their eyes. some days you look in the mirror and you can't not see your abuser staring back. you feel so gross and disgusted and dirty. you desperately want to do something to change your appearance so you don't see them anymore. so you can distance yourself from them as much as possible

[traumatizeddfox]

“i was a bad kid” bro idc if you were a child sent from hell an adult should’ve never done that to you

[what-even-is-thiss]

Asexual people who feel pressured into having sex when they don’t want to and queer people that are afraid or ashamed of having sex even though they want to are actually being repressed by the same societal forces but nobody seems to want to talk about that

[what-even-is-thiss]

Society at large wants you to experience sex in a very predictable way. It might feel like the “other side” of this problem is actually more societally accepted but this isn’t true. Society not only demands that you have sex but it demands you have a specific type of sex in a specific type of body with a specific type of person with another different specific type of body.

Having sex with a body outside the norm or with a person outside the norm in a way outside the norm is seen as rediculous. So is opting out of sex altogether. In reality both are seen as unacceptable.

The desires of those who don’t want sex and those who want sex that’s seen as abnormal by society may be different but the thing that’s stopping us from living how we want is the same.

[http-trauma]

my therapist wants me to create my own wheel of emotions and i was like "hah i can do that, that's easy" and then i just spent 1h in front of my screen wondering what's an emotion

[http-trauma]

also ive been trying to take inspiration from wheels online, but it feels like most of them have more negative than positive emotion and idk, i don't want my wheel to be JUST negative stuff?? that's not what the realm of human emotions looks like does it?

why is the "happy" category always smaller than the "angry" or "sad" categories.... that feels a little defeating....

[http-trauma]

my therapist wants me to create my own wheel of emotions and i was like "hah i can do that, that's easy" and then i just spent 1h in front of my screen wondering what's an emotion

[http-trauma]

"when you say x thing you mean x thing" no i don't but thanks for trying

[http-trauma]

mmmmm what am i doing here anymore

[http-trauma]

ive had this blog for so long and so many things happened over the years and

theres good memories attached to it

theres bad memories attached to it

i finally have access to life-long therapy thru the victim's compensation services, and my new meds seem to be working great. our new apartment is small, we may not stay here more than a year, but we're making it, me and my partner.

life's rough, but it's a bit less rough with the right ppl.

[http-trauma]

mmmmm what am i doing here anymore

[http-trauma]

"363", by @misachips.

[http-trauma]

i do usually think jeffree star should shut the fuck up in general, but also i kinda hope he doesn't shut the fuck up about defending eugenia cooney

[depsidase]

[opalsiren]

'being disabled is a full-time job' actually with most full-time jobs you get evenings and weekends off, plus holiday time and potentially other benefits like healthcare and dental. we don't get to clock off from being disabled nor do we reap any benefits, material, social, or otherwise. hope this helps