My Cerebral Cortex hurts...

I am a God amongst ants, a Pokemon Master, an expert in Google searches, personal adviser to Queen Elizabeth II, Presidential Nominee in the 2028 Election, Consultant to Professor Charles Xavier and the X-Men, Appointed As Chief Warlock by the Wizengamot, recipient of Order of Merlin & Supreme Mugwump, Former member of the Fellowship of the Ring, 6 time NBA Champion and MVP, and an avid science fan

[birdsareblooming]

sometimes i feel like im climing up this incline again alone but thankully sisypus and the itsy bitsy spider and here with me

[birdsareblooming]

holy shit is that kate bush

[auxphono]

Please please please don't click those phishing texts

[auxphono]

[grootficguy]

“Every Pokemon is someone’s favourite” I’m making a spreadsheet to see if this is true. Reblog with your favourite Pokemon in the tags.

Here’s the spreadsheet in-progress

[nohoperadio]

Scooby-Doo is a dog who can talk, which is amazing, and he largely uses his powers of speech to communicate how scared he is of ghosts and monsters, and basically the only thing his owners do is drive him around the country putting him inside various haunted houses and such. I wish I could take Scooby-Doo aside, I want to say to him, these people are not your friends.

[imwiremother]

every emotional fandom post is written like this

oscar the grouch, who lived and loved in a trash can

oscar the grouch, who ate rotten bananas because he didn't have the self esteem to try for fresh ones

oscar the grouch, who pushed big bird away because his love burned as bright as the sun and oscar the grouch knew he was the moon

[trashcora]

Obi-Wan Kenobi 1.03 ‘Part III’ | Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens

[andremichaux]

Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery (2025)

[cart-a-hearts]

Saruman tuning into the Merry and Pippin show

[hulkwillsmashforyou]

Looking for the Jily Fic where James enters Lily and Harry's lives. Turns out that the Ministry wiped their memories, so they have no recollection of James

[hulkwillsmashforyou]

It's my 14 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

[hayden-christensen]

♫ it’s me, hi, I’m the problem it’s me ♫

[the-darling-badger]

Crookshanks being an unpaid intern for Sirius Black is my favorite thing about Prisoner of Azkaban. He had that cat running ERRANDS. Ordering the Firebolt for Harry, stealing Neville's list of passwords. Crookshanks was Booked and Busy

[rottmnt-but-on-twitter]

[yiffmaster]

26 year old twinks in truck stops

[unawakening-float07]

54 year old married straight truck drivers

[smegmafactory]

Your 43 year old family dentist

[retarde]

my 36 year old ass

[madderhatter]

[sioltach]

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[codyslipring-deactivated2015060]

scrolled past this, re-evaluated my life, then SCROOOLLLED back up and hit the damn reblog button. 

[tumblgang]

She ain’t no games in real life so I take her serious all the time

Anyone with a name that starts with a “Z”, ends with an “i”, and isn’t some kind of Italian pasta, IS SERIOUS

I’m not climbing no mountain with a pig on my back, 🙅🏽🙅🏾🙅🏿 Negative.

[skuubasally]

Nope. I know better, have your reblog Madame Zeroni.

[luckytaters]

who the fuck is Madame Zeroni

[saudadesinfinitas-deactivated20]

Look at these stupid children who don’t know who Madame Zeroni is

[drayaintshit-deactivated2019030]

☝🏾😂

[callmedeku24]

Man lissen if you don’t know you better ask somebody AFTER you hit the reblog button

[emeraldmercury]

Idk who she is but I have an exam today so I’ll reblog her

[haiku-robot]

idk who she is but i have an exam today so i’ll reblog her

^Haiku^bot^0.4. Sometimes I do stupid things (but I have improved with syllables!). Beep-boop!

[jacobmick]

Because wise, I am.

[seymonecristina]

Oh fucks no she’s back lmao must reblog. I’m sorry guys

[blackgirlart]

2 million people aren’t wrong

[kiiboi-v3-blog]

Zeroni sounds like a fancy kind of pasta :’) im so sorry

[theytrey]

Ooc/ I love this book and movie so much oh my god

[carryonmywaywardcaptain]

This post was liked when it appeared on my dash, so I know I’ve reblogged, but I’m not about to mess with her!

Also, these poor youths who have no idea 😭

[rauggra]

Sorry for being superstitious but hey, this is 2020.

[aljustal]

… It’s 2020

[dealanexmachina]

If I send her some splooge and onions it should be fine, right?

[keenmarvellover]

Nearly 3 million have reblogged this thing. Not taking a risk.

[vadergf]

Idk who she is but my life is a fucking nightmare and I’m not taking any chances

[ladyvesuvia]

i dont get it

[maybanksslut]

omg ves search it up

[miridiums-writing]

I refuse for 2021 to be anything like 2020, so I shall put my trust in Madame Zeroni

[memeingcheetah27]

i like being able to live life’s bad as it is no thanks

[tommysparker]

can’t risk it sorry

[cade-the-god]

sorry no risks here

[k1ngan0n]

Risk taker? Wrong person

[nightingalestakeflight-deactiva]

it’s 2021 and this hellscape aint ded yet

[ilove-evanpeters]

paranoid help

[insufferable-yapper]

It’s 2022 and this world is a hellscape. I am obviously going to reblog this. I wen back and took out all negatives because it is in my best interest to only have positives. I, also, made sure to have the best grammar and spelling I could. We have to be safe. Thank you.

[directlyat-thesun-moved]

I want a curse! Curses are cool! But I’m reblogging this to say that.

…shit.

[kenloganroy]

We’re okay.