Real Mayonnaise @hungryformayonnaise - Tumblr Blog

fuwaprince

US Helplines:

Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696

Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail [email protected]

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: [email protected]

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 [email protected]

b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: [email protected]

b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: [email protected]

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600

Drinkline: 0800 9178282

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail [email protected]

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight

India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614

India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669

Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868

FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430

Australia: 13-11-14

Austria: 01-713-3374

Barbados: 429-9999

Belgium: 106

Botswana: 391-1270

Brazil: 21-233-9191

China: 852-2382-0000

(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)

Costa Rica: 606-253-5439

Croatia: 01-4833-888

Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67

Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908

Denmark: 70-201-201

Egypt: 762-1602

Estonia: 6-558-088

Finland: 040-5032199

France: 01-45-39-4000

Germany: 0800-181-0721

Greece: 1018

Guatemala: 502-234-1239

Holland: 0900-0767

Honduras: 504-237-3623

Hungary: 06-80-820-111

Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90

Israel: 09-8892333

Italy: 06-705-4444

Japan: 3-5286-9090

Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292

Malaysia: 03-756-8144

(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)

Mexico: 525-510-2550

Netherlands: 0900-0767

New Zealand: 4-473-9739

New Guinea: 675-326-0011

Nicaragua: 505-268-6171

Norway: 47-815-33-300

Philippines: 02-896-9191

Poland: 52-70-000

Portugal: 239-72-10-10

Russia: 8-20-222-82-10

Spain: 91-459-00-50

South Africa: 0861-322-322

South Korea: 2-715-8600

Sweden: 031-711-2400

Switzerland: 143

Taiwan: 0800-788-995

Thailand: 02-249-9977

Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800

Ukraine: 0487-327715

(Source)

uie-deactivated20230402

ALWAYS REBLOG WHEN YOU SEE SOMETHING LIKE THIS PLEASE; ITS SO MUCH MORE THAN IMPORTANT TO PEOPLE. IT MEANS EVERYTHING TO SOMEBODY AND EVEN THOUGH YOU MIGHT NOT SEE THIS IN THE SAME LIGHT, SOMEONE MIGHT. INFACT YOU REBLOGGING THIS COULD STOP SOMEONE TAKING THEIR LIFE TONIGHT.

kitten--aesthetics-blog

I noticed there isn’t one here for Ireland, so

Irish free suicide helpline: 01-116 123

thescientificviolist

last time i reblogged this, i got this ask:

so please, please reblog. this could actually save a life.

#important #important important important

itsapmseymour

Caramelldansen turns 20 this year and frankly I am not prepared for that.

itsapmseymour

roseverdict

So it’s settled? When November 2 rolls around, we’re all laying facedown and blasting Caramelldansen?

kazooyah

no we’re gonna put our big boy pants on and do the goddamn caramelldansen dance for once in our lives

xxtc-96xx

Well I know what I’ll have to reblog on the 2nd

loredwy

Happy 22th birthday Caramelldansen 🎉

the-hydroxian-artblog

zootycoon-archive

i got these knockoff boots online and instead of the brand name on the tag they have the name of an apparently nonexistent martin scorsese movie??? what the fuck

world heritage post

no

kadethecat

runby2

Just so you all know, my tumblr glitched egregiously so now every time someone reblogs this from me, tumblr takes me off of my dashboard or search results and forces me to see this post again

runby2

WHY DID SOMEONE ADD AN INCINERATOR ????

runby2

I would like to issue a formal apology to this website for kickstarting the horse plinko meme .

inthefallofasparrow

lanterne

Let's build a guillotine

wood

blade

basket

the blood of Jeff Bezos

vanilla extract

Voting ended onFeb 7, 2023

xiranjayzhao

DAMMIT YOU GUYS THIS GUILLOTINE IS NOT GONNA WORK IF IT'S 63% LIQUID

(it'll smell really good tho)

forkaround

@xiranjayzhao hold up, are you that chinese fantasy dress checking person from youtube??? What are you doing here?

xiranjayzhao

TRYING TO BUILD A GUILLOTINE, WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE

COME ON PEOPLE WE DESPERATELY NEED MORE WOOD

cryptotheism

When I got hit with a Havana Syndrome beam, it caused a resonance cascade between my rose quartz nipple piercings and the communion wafer in my stomach that gave every rat in a 5 mile radius a lethal orgasm.

melynnwaters

2,138,065 original posts remain.

wikipediahmms

mintblancmanche

janime6

reblog sleeping Aqua to get a good night’s sleep tonight

thingssheadores-deactivated2014

mariecanker-blog

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS. THIS IS SO NASTY. WHAT IS THIS STRANGELY SHAPED, HI RES FUCKED UP PIECE OF SHIT. SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME THIS DISGUSTING MASS OF WHAT THE FUCK EVER THIS EVEN IS. WHY DO THINGS EXIST LIKE THIS. WHAT THE HELL DO I TAG THIS NASTY THING. WHAT IS THIS. WHAT IS THIS

striders

it’s a sliced mango holy shit

mariecanker-blog

oh. i like mangoes.

undeadentropy

Toddler response

pikevoy-deactivated20240302

butchfalin

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

sic-semper-hominibus

the most "fucking, fair enough i guess" response ive ever gotten to something i said was in the ER

me: hi, i need a rabies shot triage nurse: oh? why's that? me: i got bitten by a bat triage nurse: what were you doing that you got bitten by a bat at 3 in the morning? me: removing a bat from my bedroom

sic-semper-hominibus

im given to understand that it generally takes a lot to leave ER staff speechless, but it sure was a good 5 seconds before she thought of anything to say to that

sic-semper-hominibus

#prev u say sol but u see. i have reblogged this post at least 3 times at different points in the past#bC PEOPLE KEEP SENDING IT TO ME!!!#i will reblog as usual.

@solipseismic i am FASCINATED to discover that you are a real person and not a fictional character because this has been tagged about you often enough that i assumed it was a fandom thing. is your story any more interesting than mine or did it just make a disproportionately massive impression on your fiend group?

solipseismic

i had to take a moment to compose myself this (fandom thing) is possibly the funniest thing anyone's ever said about me. probably not more interesting but like 200% more stupid and so accordingly has made a bit of an impression on most of the people who know me

>be me (freshman living in college dorm)

>go for a walk in the beautiful spring weather

>there is a bat on the sidewalk in the middle of the day

>sidebar to note that at this point in life my bat knowledge solely consists of "usually flying" and "only comes out at night"

>how terrible this bat must be disoriented by the bright sunlight (middle of the day) and fell from where it was ........................... roosting (on the sidewalk)

>if i put this bat in a box with some water and then bring it back out at night maybe it will have recovered enough from the. sun

>text my roommate asking him to put a towel in a box

>i pick up the bat (on the sidewalk) (middle of the day) (no gloves)

>one bat in a box later i log onto tumblr dot com and post something along the lines of: does anyone know what to do in case of accidental bat acquisition

>mutual from area with many bats: you need to get rabies shots IMMEDIATELY

>i have no car (freshman in college dorms)

>surely it isn't that serious

>thanks to google i now have 200% more bat knowledge and Boy I Fucked Up

>me to my mutual: it only bit me a few times and its teeth are so tiny it didn't even break the skin i'm sure i'll be fine :)

>i am of a curious nature so i google rabies symptoms

>oh! i need to get rabies shots!

so my ER experience was actually something pretty similar

me: hi, i need a rabies shot

triage nurse: oh? why's that?

me: i got bitten by a bat

triage nurse: what were you doing that you got bitten by a bat in the middle of the day?

me: picking up a bat off the sidewalk

triage nurse:

sic-semper-hominibus

HEY, HOLY SHIT

no-chill-at-all

captain-snark

this poor man

cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024

masks and helmets that hides someone's face in such a way that they become the face themselves my beloved

these are all creatures to me

ancient-debris

Angel of War, angular and strange, gleaming silver and gold, Angel of Wonder, pure and one-eyed, looking to stars new and old, Angel of Harvest, simple and hidden, bring nature's sweetness to all, Angel of Health, mysterious and fine, beacon when life starts to fall, Angel of the Deep, crooked and cage-like, guide us across the sea, Angel of Solace, protect us from evil, lead us to where we are free.