Studying with Mental Illness
Many of you may or may have not known but here we go! My name is Lina and i suffer from high functioning severe depression, panic attack disorder and generalized anxiety, suicide and self harm. Finishing off my sophomore year in high school i started developing depression. it got to the point of turning to the internet and getting caught up with online predators for attention and “happiness” after moving to another town not too far away, it turned into serious suicidal thoughts and attempts. Little did my parents know i was going to finish sophomore year and had a plan to end things from there. My parents found out that i was talking to strangers online and were very upset about finding all my suicidal thoughts on the internet. Still not sure as to the seriousness, i got in trouble. My parents were told to take me to therapy and psychiatric help right away. That is when my parents knew what was happening and the seriousness behind it. After months and years of switching meds, rigorous therapy, constant supervision…I was finally able to become stable. But as high school went on, things were getting stressful and i turned to self harm. I had even made another suicidal attempt. Self harm is still something i have a hard time stopping but as soon as I graduated, got a job and started college, I was happy with my life and doing very well to this day.
This was a long process, it did not happen in one day. So how did i continue to study and balance my mental health?
•you will need to decide what school fits you! personally, public school was just fine for me; having to get used to talking to people and learning social skills. but maybe that’s not the right one for you! and that’s ok! consider a charter or private school for a smaller group of students and more “attention” towards each student. Look at schools in your areas that are specific to mental health. I know plenty of friends that had to attend a different school that could accommodate to their needs no matter the illness. If you still want public, make sure to pay attention to class sizes and statistics on scores and grades. Every school is different. Ask around the internet or to neighbors or others that have attended the school and see what the people were like. I started hs in a super rich and spoiled town but i then switched schools my junior year of hs and there was a lot more diversity of students from races, ethnicity, sexuality, disabilities and more. People were a lot more humble about their money. It was the best thing I could have done for myself.
•now you have your school, but let’s look at the teachers. even if you tried your best, not ALL your teachers will be your favorite:( But here’s what should happen in order for things to work out. when starting a class, most teachers want to get to know you. fav color, hobby, subject etc. Then they ask for “others things i should be concerned or know about?” this is where you and your parents/guardians come to play. Write down a note or something that gives a general idea of what your mental health is. For example, my parents would write a note or email to the teacher explaining the circumstances and having the teacher contact THEM if they noticed anything wrong.
•PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make sure you are taking your medications correctly and everyday if needed. Always keep a backup dose in your backpack or purse or whatever in case you were running late. Never miss a dose. For example, i have to take effexor for my depression. this medication is the kind that you CANNOT just skip a dose or two. if i skip even just one dose, i get headaches and feel nauseous and throw up. This is also one that has some anxiety help component to it therefore keeping me awake so that means i have to take it in the morning so that i am not tossing and turning during my much needed nights sleep. i have to have at least a couple hundred calories eaten with my meds. i also take clonazipan; my anxiety meds. lately i’ve been doing well and haven’t needed it everyday (this is me personally, talk to your doctor about what you should be doing i am no doctor) so i take it as needed for extra stressful moments and if i accidentally took my effexor at night.
•MEDS ARE HERE FOR A REASON! MAKE SURE YOU ARE TAKING THEM AND TALK TO YOUR PSYCHIATRIST ABOUT EVERYTHING YOU EXPERIENCE WITH YOUR MEDS
You are more important than your grades/studies:
•if you need to walk out of a classroom to take a breather, then do so. if you need to cry and let it out, excuse yourself and go. if teachers give you any problems, ignore them. talk with your parents. they will back you up or talk to an administrator if you do not have that family support. If you absolutely, cannot do your homework because of a circumstance (do not use this as an excuse; do your best) then take the time to heal mentally. you will not be able to do your absolute best if you are not in the right mental state.
Be gentle and kind to yourself:
•believe me, i know that it isn’t easy to believe the positive thoughts you try to tell yourself. it sounds super cheesy when you do but just as all those negative thoughts brought you down, the opposite will occur!
amandla
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