everything is connected

hi, my name is ely

[lesbianshepard]

I would be the worst spy of all time because on one hand I overshare like hell, but on the other hand I also have THE shittiest memory so it’s really a lose/lose scenario for everyone involved.

[lesbianshepard]

guy interrogating me: What’s the passcode?

me: Ah fuck. I think it might be 792.....4?

me: Actually no I think it starts with a 2.

me:

me: Yeah I usually just rely on muscle memory for it. Do you think you could get a keypad in here? That might be faster.

[lesbianshepard]

guy interrogating me: who do you work for?!

me: Okay, so this is super embarrassing. I know he told me his name when we first met but I forgot and at this point it would be weird if I asked him for his name again, right? So I just kind of go with “sir” whenever I have to talk to him. It might be David though. He looks like a David.

[lesbianshepard]

me, after being extracted: bad news guys, I totally blew Dave’s cover.

my boss: Wait, what?

me: Yeah, like they had knives and shit and it was kind of stressful so I just told them that my contact’s name was David Johnson. Really sorry about that.

boss: We don’t have a David Johnson working for us. Are you thinking of James?

me: 

me: Good news, guys, I did not blow James’ cover!

[lesbianshepard]

Enemy 1: So, how did the interrogation go?

Enemy 2: We got nothing. All they did was ramble on about their childhood trauma for two hours.

Enemy 1: Hmm. maybe lower the dose of the truth serum next time.

Enemy 2: We didn’t use truth serum.

[unicornempire]

This is still my favorite joke ever I don’t care how old it is it’s timelessssss.

[snowthunder]

I think we need to talk about the under appreciated Window Seat fandom

I mean really? With the book shelves?

It’s like an alcove of happiness.

You want a whole row of individual seats? Fine, here you go. 

Or how about a whole window bed for those snugglers out there.

Curtains.. Guys this one has curtains.

Seriously? This is basically a glass cube of bliss.

 You can even get them with corners! Not enough corners? Okay.

Ba-BAM!! Corners for cocooning. 

There’s also the Roman-esque themed seat for the historians out there. 

 If you don’t want to snuggle up in blankets with hot cocoa in this then I don’t even know why you’re on this planet. I mean dat stonework. 

This one’s an entire rectangle. Just imagine all the cuddling that could happen in there. It’s practically a fortress.

This one’s fucking curved okay? it’s just chillin, up of the ground, and curved for your lounging convenience. 

don’t like rectangles or square? Okay. Have a fucking trapezoid seat.

[protecticarus]

estevez: you have the right to remain silent-

dirk: but do I have the ability

[laniidae-passerine]

[mysteriousgap]

[geeeeeeeeeeeeeeenji]

a person i’ve never met before in my life: *greets me by name*

me:

[gayboomhauer]

reblog to let him know that you love him

[extraordinaryxmen]

the fact that keanu reeves rejected being on mcu multiple times but said yes to be on a sponge bob movie just shows how truly powerful he is

[animatedtext]

A piece from an art show I was a part of last night and a constant mood

[animatedtext]

oh just to clarify yes i made this 😭 i’m a bitch is trying

[kurosmind]

There’s one (1) think in Disney’s Mulan that irks me.  The jaw line.  Mulan’s jaw line is drawn differently when she’s acting as Ping. No kidding: this is her “regular, Fa Mulan” face. In this version her jaw is even highlighted by the makeup. Look how round is it.

and this is her Ping jaw. Square. Totally square.

WHY?????  Isn’t consistency in the character base shapes like, an important thing??

Not to mention how she immediately regains her long lashes as soon as she is exposed. With her round jaw obviously.

????? 

[eorzean-cabbage]

That feel when you’re Asian and your father with a bad leg was about to be sent off to surely die in a war for your great empire so you squared up both metaphorically and physically.

[bemusedlybespectacled]

it’s on the fricking vhs cover

this has bothered me since 1999

[smaug-official]

Why do you have to come for Mulan like this

[ithotyouknew2-deactivated201710]

It’s called contour sweetie

[thequantumqueer]

[ravietta]

Gilderoy Lockhart. 1964-present. 

A famous con artist. Best remembered for forgetting all about being a con artist. 

[ghoulish-kat]

Gilderoy made this himself.

[ravietta]

Minerva McGonagall. 1935 - present.

Currently Headmistress of Hogwarts. Professor McGonagall was awarded the Order of Merlin, First Class, for her unwavering allegiance to the Order of Phoenix. A well known hatstall. 

If you like my animations you can support me on Ko-fi~

[gahdamnpunk]

THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT

[johnny-and-dora]

must i pursue a career? is it not enough to be passionate about tv shows and snack foods?

[nocontextgoodplace]

[hirohamahda]

[phoneticmeow]

Tumblr on November 1st