Wizards Only

He/him I caved and finally started a wizard blog

[plaguedocboi]

Im weighing in on the discourse. We need to start putting sea monsters on maps again.

[kingsweeviladvisor]

what people think being a evil wizard is like:

- space lightning

- cursing your enemies

what being and evil wizard is actually like:

- saying "i'm insane" all the time to defend yourself so people know that you are aware of how insane you sound

- hearing all the sounds that everything in the universe makes and fitting them together as a song

- knowing that magic is not changing how this song sounds but singing along and dancing to it

- and if i'm honest. a little bit of space lightning and cursing your enemies. as a treat

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

and tax evasion?

[sahonithereadwolf]

Thinking about the werewolf from the hate mail Lemgo council pharmacist David Welman (1595 - 1669) got after being accused of being a werewolf

[sahonithereadwolf]

it's so fucking cute. That war wlf is frolicking

[sahonithereadwolf]

Someone drew this in anger, they drew this and said "look at what a terrible beast you are"

[knightclubbing]

having to stop your conversation with a coworker when a customer walks in has the same vibe as two knights talking ildly on guard duty who have to quickly shut up and resume their positions as the king walks by. at least. i think so

[morhath]

I hate when king arthur has all these fussy little steps in the instructions and you're like "no way do these fussy little steps matter" but you try it and they do. they matter so much.

[bookaddict7342]

I thought you meant Camelot quests and I was like "that's fair, 'never pick a four leaf clover on the last Wednesday of the month' IS a fussy little step that shouldn't matter" but then I was like "wait isn't that also a flour company"

[morhath]

nooo I am not a beleaguered knight of the round table I am making elaborate focaccia 😭

[perhats]

I say shit like "If my memory serves me" knowing damn well it serves the dark lord

[phantomtomes]

I just think we all deserve massive home libraries and a couple swords, as a treat

[micahulrichdraws]

LAST CHANCE! It's the last day to grab my hand-signed “Life & “Personal Growth” Small Art Prints at a discount. You can check ‘em out in my web shop (in my bio)!

[reallybadblackoutpoems]

the canterbury tales (c. 1400) - geoffrey chaucer

“hot wench summer”

[aldred-reads-writes]

The Girl Who Became a Knight (and minstrel)

[speakthewordonly]

in a kill it with your sword kill it with your sword amen mood today

[butter-n-breadrolls]

the other elves welcoming Legolas in Valinor

[thisauthorisscreaming]

Does it count as 'sword in the stone' if it looks more like 'sword in the cairn'...?

[the-haiku-bot]

Does it count as ‘sword

in the stone’ if it looks more

like 'sword in the cairn’…?

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[medievalsquire]

Squire Affirmations

I will not trip and fall down the stairs while carrying all of my knights armor again

The horses love me

I am not in love with the wizard apprentice

My knight appreciates my hard work

It is not my fault that my last three knights died horribly

[eatmorebikes]

[bunniope]

hey thanks for calling me your "loyal knight" now i'm horny enough to win any battle

[evil-b0ng-ripping-wizard]

[conjurer-of-worms]

life pro tip: don't doxx yourself??

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

It’s fine that’s a tower noooooobody is gonna get him up there! Very tall and far from the ground! Knights will get way too tired!