The process of writing poetry is a poet’s dilemma
If someone asks me, what is it like being a poet?
I wonder a bit, and somehow every answer I come across seems counterfeit.
Cause It's about converting the heart-wrenching pain into something pleasing.
Cause writing poems isn’t merely about telling the world how you feel, it is more about writing out the stirring echo in the back of your head that you can’t get out, the chaos and tangible notions coming along under one script, the story starts weaving and it becomes visible to you like your silhouette when you step under lamp shade from the night.
Sometimes, I even ask myself, Is poetry leading me into depression?
Is it worth revisiting those moments again to give an artistic meaning to that agony?
The schizophrenic aspects of it, the delusions that are accompanied.
Most people don’t even know what it feels like to be depressed.
it's like a state of mind where you crumble yourself like dust, and get engulfed in an infinite pit which makes it impossible to escape the loop. I am a child of the night and that's why it seems I understand darkness a bit more and relate to it perhaps a bit more than others. The nature of pain is that it changes and eases, it softens, and in the aftermath, you realize that it didn’t have the power to kill you even when you thought it had. The five stages of grief you went through come up together to create a hollow void and It's up to you now how you choose to fill it. Because the intensity was much, it depends subjectively on how cautiously, and when exactly you let the light to enter again.
And a mindstate is born that can process all of the past and weave a tale out of it, thus, a poem is written.
This was the process of writing poetry.