prince of the halflings @idiotxwizard - Tumblr Blog

humans fill a similar ecological niche to beavers. we create the basis for entire ecosystems and if we refuse that role or do it improperly, those ecosystems we build suffer. theres not a natural world with no humans in our niche and hasnt been for a very, very long time. we are not seperate from nature and never have been, not as hunter gatherers, not as dense urbanites.

malewifesband

our extinction would be no less devastating to the ecosystems we inhabit than our pollution of them. we can see one example of this in the genocide of native peoples from turtle island and the ecosystemic collapses that followed those genocides. like without the controlled burns that were standard practice for those indigenous to the great plains, wildfires grow to devastating levels. horticultural gardens that feed not just humans but many other species grow unhealthy and imbalanced without the people who tend them

king-the-pathetic

Devastating, he went out in the rain without his little yellow raincoat

screechfoxes

CRITICAL ROLE 4.27 Complicated Questions

+ bonus Kattigan reaction:

quiddie

Thaisha x Hal (and Kattigan can watch) 💖

silvisays

Idk girl he’s been a red flag since day one 🤷‍♀️

Sheeeeee’s baaaaack! Hi everyone!!!!! I’m still alive! Real life has been super busy but Ive spent the past few months chipping away at this animation in my absence. I plan to make more animatics (tho they wont be as detailed but hopefully at a faster pace lmaoo.) I hope everyone is doing well! XOXO Silvi 💋

venndaai

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.

venndaai

they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you

fluorescentbrains

this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard

just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !

muffinlance

Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!

Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir

I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks

cash4bees

I think the reason I still enjoy tumblr is that even though this all still pisses me off, I know that anything that makes me mad on here is 100% earnest. It's not ragebait or engagement farming, y'all are actually just that stupid sometimes

skritzzy

I feel like any aliens that were prey at some point in evolution would have an odd fear of humans. Mostly cause they look like predators, act a bit like predators, and ARE predators. One perfect example is when we're focused on something like a mosquito that's been bugging us for a long time and we are just done.

Alien: "What. What..?"

Human: *HUNTING down a mosquito it saw*

Alien: ".... yeah I am really uncomfortable...."

Human: *quiet footsteps, pupils dialated, intense focus,*

Alien: *WAR FLASHBACKS*

Human: "Found you." *absolutely desimates the mosquito, squashing it into a million pieces as it's guts and various body parts liquidize into blood of the bloodthirsty, now stained on the palm of the human. A living being now reduced to a useless corpse as the human wipes the remains on their pants*

Alien: "I feel like I've just gained trauma."

graylinesspam

okay fucking fun addition to this post. Hunting instincts in humans absolutely still exist and are usually triggered either by fascination or anger. The polar opposite of flight is pursue. An anecdote for this is that the other day my sister, who is an avid "take the bug outside in a cup" rescues kittens in her free time kinda person, looked out the window and saw a chicken in the middle of our driveway. which is a very unusual occurrence despite us living in the country.

All she had to do was say the words "there's a chicken" and her as well as my own body language immediately shifted. We were out the door and in the yard already sorta hunched over and walking on the balls of our feet, fucking flanking this chicken. No words were exchanged. We just slowly circled this chicken like a couple of rabid dogs. totally single-mindedly focused on capturing the prey.

The chicken could feel it, it immediately began counter maneuvers to avoid us and it was faster. But there were two of us and we knew the land better, we knew how to herd it into a corner, carefully watching it's body language and lurching to counter it's escape attempts. And it was fucking thrilling.

Of course, when we both closed in on it and finally got our hands on the poor thing we simply took it into the back patio away from the cats and the vultures that wanted to actually finish the job. No harm came to the bird. We located its owner and returned him to his flock but still. From an outside perspective, it was a bit unnerving. And for the chicken, it was no different than being hunted. He was just lucky enough that we were predators who appreciated the companionship of pets and were more concerned with returning him to his humans than eating him.

Now imagine any fucking alien species watching a pair of humans, who literally rehabilitate animals in their free time, who are not soldiers and seem to be totally domesticated, just absolutely flip a switch and turn into pack-hunting pursuit predators? On a single word.

(felt like the bulldog from Rio's bird chasing monologue hit a little too hard after this)

silvergryphonart

I would even argue that humans need to do this, so much so that we’ve invented a million and one ways to satisfy this instinct.

Photography.

Ball games.

I Spy.

Playing hunting games with the fellow predators we keep as pets.

Hide and seek.

Many hobbies that involve prolonged seeking behaviour or watching something to make sure it’s moving right.

I 100% feel myself slipping into “hunt mode” doing jigsaw puzzles, changed movement and all—same as when I’m out birding—and my mental health seems to get better afterwards.

pyroteknich

That laser focus you get when your pet has a limp. The "why are you limping/are you limping?" look. I get the feeling that between that, and watching us play video games, that predatory instinct would be very visible. Not only that, we teach other animals to hunt with us. And one is a prey animal. Dogs we teach to hunt with us. But we also teach horses to hunt. Specifically, cattle horses. If you have never seen a cattle horse work when it is cutting a cow from the herd, you should. That is peak predator behavior. Watch a pack of wolves separating a caribou from the herd, then watch a cutting horse work. Certain motions are exactly the same, but very eerie on a herd animal. We are such consummate predators that we have mastered the art of training a herd animal to behave like a part of a pack of predators. I say this as someone who has worked with cutting horses, has trained horses (not to cut, but to jump and do dressage), and lives in an area where cattle is a big industry. As predators, we are terrifying.

somestorythoughts

#a group of three or more juvenile humans will spontaneously reinvent 'tag' if there's space to run even if they don't share a language.

butchyena

this is the funniest fucking billboard possible. who the fuck paid for this

notlikingbestgirl

Out of Touch

hustlerose

Out of Touch Thursday

arbyscurlyfries666-deactivated2

OUT OF TOUCH THURSDAY

snuv

but im out of my head when you’re not around…

rockmilkshake

happy birthday.

saltwatersweets

this is the only out of touch thursday you can reblog this

deactivating-s00n-deactivated20

tumblr users’ obsession with self-reporting (especially as a weird form of penance) needs to be studied

deactivating-s00n-deactivated20

you don’t need to tell the world you still like Harry Potter because it’s your comfort movie or because your dad read it to you when you were little or something like that in response to a post about the harm continued monetary support of Harry Potter causes. you don’t need to tell tumblr all the myriad of reasons you don’t like rap under a post about how rap is often misrepresented as ultra-violent or overtly sexual and misogynistic because of racism. No one on tumblr has to know anything about you. no one has to know you still read your old Harry Potter books or that the only rap artist you like is Eminem. No one is going to say “oh of course you’re the One True Good Person with a Good Reason!” when you say that rap is difficult to listen to because of your auditory processing disorder or you’re only a part of the Marauders fandom. Just keep your shit to yourself and don’t embarrass yourself under other peoples’ posts.

lebada

funniest possible reply and its not even on purpose

crimeronan

-charlotte zhang art installation at the alice gallery

nostalgic-teddyy

Imagine the level of whimsy I could reach if I just had $5M in my bank account rn

personalgremlin

this makes me want to cry

aqueerkettleofish

First of all, “…they were surrounded on all sides by echoes and images of themselves, in a world where image and object had not yet torn themselves apart” is one of the most poetic phrasings I’ve ever heard.

Second, here’s the original source, “What the caves are trying to tell us” by Sam Kriss.

Third, the original opens with: “Every so often, I get the urge to drag someone into a cave, and show them something unspeakable.”

I had another point, but it got lost in the artful prose of this article.

dragon-in-a-fez

I feel like “every so often, I get the urge to drag someone into a cave and show them something unspeakable” is something that’s okay for a paleolithic cave art expert to say, but like, absolutely no one else

spin-the-wheel-polls

make a bunch of wheels with bread/cheese/meat/vegetables/sauce/extra so that you can Spin for Sandwich

you're making a sandwich!! Spin THIS wheel 3-5 times for the toppings!

How is it!

good!!

it's alright

inedible

Results

Voting ended onJun 3

op note: I GOT JAM, JAM AND HOT SAUCE. IM DEAD.

#bbq sauce. one of my mutuals. mayo.#this is a terrible sandwich

mewvore

Do not fall for the grindset mentality; jerk off and eat a hot pocket to recover spiritually

greatlordfluffernutter

Good point. We should jerk off and *throws dart* eat some pork bao. Or if you're vegetarian we could *spins comically sized wheel* eat some samosas. What's truly important is we have to jerk off. Together.