The Sith Resurgence - Cherish
Rey stepped into the kitchen to find Aliana at the counter, fumbling with the caf distiller. By the looks of it, something wasn't working right, as Aliana was growing increasingly agitated.
"C'mon," she muttered, almost helplessly. "Just work. I'm so tired..."
Rey came up behind her and wrapped their arms around Aliana's waist, eliciting a tiny jolt from their wife. "Distiller on the fritz again?"
Aliana relaxed against them and sighed in frustration. "Yeah. Won't turn on."
"I'll fix it," Rey said softly, kissing Aliana's hair.
"Thank you," Aliana sighed. "...Woman today?"
Rey nodded.
"Got it."
Rey stood there, her hands running over Aliana's bare stomach. Her skin was always so smooth and soft no matter what conditions she was put through. Aliana could trudge through a desert for a week and still come home looking like she was fresh out of the bath. It had to be the Force. Some secret of the Dark Side that Aliana had used to achieve eternal beauty, and definitely not the seven skincare products that were lined around the jet-tub. Those were just for show, she was certain of it.
Her hand then stilled as it brushed over the single rough patch just below her navel. A patch of low-grade synthskin, practically invisible to the eye but always apparent whenever Rey touched it. A cold reminder of one of the worst days of her life.
During the war, Rey and Aliana had battled the Knights of Ren on the Supremacy. Rey had foolishly left her guard open and was incapacitated. But just before the Knight could strike a killing blow, Aliana had thrown her lightsaber to stop it. Though this saved Rey's life, it had left Aliana open to be impaled through the stomach by Kylo Ren. Rey had never felt more terror in her life than when she saw her wife fall. Aliana had been seriously injured that day. She needed a cybernetic leg, but his lightsaber had severed her spinal cord and also required a cybernetic replacement. Aliana was comatose for four months while she recovered.
Rey had nearly lost the woman she loved most in this galaxy that day. Worse even, during her coma she had been forced to confront just how poorly she had been treating her up to that point. She promised herself, and Alie once she had woken up, that things would be better. That she would be better. It was a miracle that Aliana survived, and she wasn't going to waste that miracle.
Alas, Aliana was determined to leave her mark on the galaxy. To pull the Sith from the ashes of extinction and create a better life for the Outer Rim. It was a dangerous life, being the Dark Lady, and she embraced it. Rey admired that. Admired the way Alie went above and beyond for her people. Admired the way she loved the galaxy. Admired the fortitude and will to face down Imperial politics every single day. But at the same time it worried her. She was afraid. Afraid of the next stray blaster bolt or slugthrower bullet. Afraid of the next coup or uprising.
Afraid of the fact that in an instant, Alie could be gone.
Her arms tightened around her wife's waist, pulling her closer and taking a whiff of her scent. Nutmeg. She always smelled like nutmeg. Like a bakery, just off the heels of making a fresh batch of ginger sweet rolls. It was soothing. Grounding. It took her thoughts away from that grim paranoia.
Aliana reached back and gently stroked her cheek, and Rey was overcome with a protective instinct so potent she actually whimpered.
"...You okay?" Aliana asked, her fingers lingering in Rey's side-tie.
"Yeah, I'm okay," Rey whispered, pressing a kiss to Aliana's cheek. "Just... thinking."
"About what?"
"About how precious you are to me," Rey whispered. "About how I'd do anything to keep something like the Supremacy from happening again."
There was a small gasp and the hand on Rey's cheek pressed more firmly. "Rey, I'm alright. I'm still here."
"I know, I just... you're the Dark Lady. You're a galactic figure. You're a target," Rey said softly. "I can't help but be afraid..."
"Rey..."
"I know that you can take care of yourself. I know that you're the most skilled Force user in the galaxy," Rey murmured into Aliana's neck. "But at the same time... I want to hold you close and put myself between you and the galaxy. I want to protect what I cherish the most. I don't want to see you hurt again. By anyone."
Aliana felt her eyes sting. Rey's words, practically whispered into her ear, pulled at something deep within her. "Rey I... I'm touched..."
Rey lifted her head. "Really? You don't find that... demeaning?"
"No, I think it's beautiful," Aliana said softly, turning in her arms to face her. "I... being the Dark Lady is second nature. I've been the Dark Lady since I was a kid. But it's not me. It's what I need to be. If I hadn't been that person, I'd have been dead a long time ago. I don't like being Darth Amorosa. She's cold, harsh, and she can't show weakness to anyone or they might stab her in the back."
Rey knew this. She knew Darth Amorosa was a mask Aliana developed when she was a teenager to survive without her mother. She'd seen her don the mask in front of others, and the shift was jarring the first time she witnessed it. She hid her true self from the rest of the galaxy, but with Rey she had always shown it. It was Amorosa that she hid from Rey.
But she hadn't known that it caused her so much stress.
"I can't show anyone that I might be vulnerable or emotional... but I am those things. I have to let others think their insults and accusations just bounce off of me, but they don't," Aliana said, laying her head against Rey's chest. "But I don't have to be Amorosa here. I don't have to shrug everything off. I don't have to pretend I don't feel anything. You make it safe to be vulnerable because I know you won't hurt me."
Rey gasped softly, squeezing Aliana tightly and laying her head against Aliana's hair. "Alie... you should be able to feel safe everywhere."
"I know... but I don't..." Aliana sniffled, nuzzling into Rey's tunic. "Darth Amorosa is a mask I'm glad to be rid of when I'm home with my family. And I think I'd quite like to just curl up and be protected from the galaxy for a while. Let someone else watch my back for me. You... make being the Dark Lady an easier burden to bear."
That did it. The tears were streaming down Rey's cheeks as she cradled her wife and gently rocked on the spot. Aliana's words prompted a new wave of feelings that made her want to say something, but she was utterly lost for words.
There was something about Aliana. She could list out everything she admired about her if she was so prompted, but there was something deeper. The mere fact of her existence that tugged at something inside Rey. The simple, indisputable truth that she was alive that, to Rey at least, was all the justification she needed to want to preserve that life by any means necessary. A deep, primal desire merely to see someone flourish and thrive.
Was this what it meant to love someone completely and utterly?
She pressed a soft, tearful kiss to Aliana's hair and very gently whispered "I love you."
"I love you too," Aliana whispered back.
They stayed like that for a moment longer, simply holding each other. Aliana allowed herself to be held. To be cherished.
Then, with tears shimmering in her eyes, she lifted her head up to look into Rey's eyes. "...Could you please fix the distiller? I really need caff," she said almost pitifully.
Rey let out a soft giggle and nodded, letting go of her. "Yeah, I'll get right on that, Kranjen. You can have whatever you want."
Thank you for writing this. It’s so lovely and wholesome, and it puts the biggest smile on my face whenever I see your writing.
