*stares into the distance*

I'm a trainwreck, but I'm still going mildly strong you know

[chickenfarmersan]

[yougottabeniceforwhat]

[desiccantdonoteat]

[needlepointcursewords]

[notsoterriblymisanthropic]

the one addition that truly makes this clip even more powerful is knowing that Mr Sterling is this guy:

I am in awe trying to imagine the sheer levels of non sequiturs they would be able to produce together.

[bogleech]

New reaction meme just dropped

[crabussy]

really fond of humans just from an appearance standpoint. the long legs. the manes of hair that can come in practically any colour and texture. those crazy high-contrast eyes with the white scleras and colourful irises. the fingers being so much longer than the toes. there's a lot to love. solid 10/10 animal species

[crabussy]

BAFFLINGLY SPOT ON COMPARISON.

[kosmogrl]

oooh I get it it’s always gonna be because of the environment I grew up in

[aceofpans]

it’s because of the curse

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

it has come to my attention there exists a subset of reenactors who go around renaissance faires "infecting" bystanders with the Plague. i wish to thank these heroes for their service

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

yes this can come in the form of dressing up as a pack of rats and offering people "Congratulations! You've Contracted The Black Death" hand stamps, but consider also:

walking around asking people if they want to pet your rat (plushie)

going in character as a fur trader carting around a wagon full of exotic wares at competitive prices

handing people a business card containing only the printed image of a flea (and on the back, the text "uh-oh!")

cosplaying as a giant bacterium

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

*hands you my business card* it contains a single drawing of a flea

*instinctively you flip it over searching for information*

[1five1two]

[decadent-hag]

[lesbianmarrow]

free use is kind of a funny kink bc it relies on the idea that everybody wants to touch you and have sex with you but what if they don't. what if you tell everybody at the party you're free use but they all ignore you and mind their own business

[tunnaa-unnaa]

taking notes

[coughloop]

Worlds oldest haunted house has passed away at the age of 207

[coughloop]

I think you have a fundamental misunderstanding of... maybe everything actually

[pmamtraveller]

Karin Hosono - Wind

[kroovv]

A little Brushbuddy 🍊

[bumblebeebats]

Why is it that every time I google something like "Are olives poisonous to cats" the top results are always like "Fun fact: Cats are carnivores! This means that they eat meat. There is no reason to include olives in a cat's diet. You should feed your cat cat food, which is dry or wet food especially designed for cats. You can purchase this at a store." like is there a single person alive on the planet who's googled "Are blueberry muffins safe for cats" because they're planning on switching their cat to a muffin-only diet??? No, I'm asking because the little bastard somehow popped open the packet while I was putting away the groceries and dragged one under the couch before I could react and now I need to know if I should call the after-hours vet. "Cats should not eat spaghetti." NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!!!! "Try to keep human food away from cats." i live in a studio apartment with a completely silent and permanently hungry apex predator who has the intelligence of a toddler and the desperate Machiavellian cunning of a creature who spent his formative months on the streets. He can already open doors and he is this 👌 close to learning how to open the microwave. He is stronger than me and covered in knives. So im gonna do my best but for the moment i just need you to tell me whether this yoghurt is going to kill my son y/n

[spectralhauntings]

I've been using the pet poison hotline's poison list cause it has a search function. It also tells you whether something is mildly, moderately, or severely toxic which can be very handy! It doesn't contain like everything but it might be a good place to start, it also includes plants for fellow houseplant lovers <3

Explore Pet Poison Helpline®s vast knowledge on poisons by reviewing our pet poison list. Explore our top 10 poison and holiday poison lists

[littlemousling]

For plants specifically, there’s also a wildly detailed set of posts and listings about toxicity on the old, wonderful, Plants Are the Strangest People blog

[angelicdewdrop]

[vivitur-moritur]

the sewing machine is a delicate breed of horse

[vivitur-moritur]

update: i’ve made it through the user manual and have sewn myself a cravat. the sewing machine is a delicate breed of horse with anger in its motion and spite in its heart.

[gayglitterqueen]

I watched Jaws for the first time last night and this was all I could think of the whole time

[auxins-insanities]

this disability pride month lets be kinder to folks with moral ocd . no more “if you really care about this minority , you’ll reblog this post” , “someone will die if you don’t reblog this” , etc etc , and all other kinds of guilt tripping reblog bait . at the VERY LEAST tag your reblog bait so we can filter it out and avoid unnecessary spirals . it’s 2026 , we need to move past using guilt to get engagement .

[tourfilm]

living under a rock is so fun i love watching a movie that’s been famous for decades and being like wow this is so good.. did you guys know about this

[tastefullyoffensive]

Never Before Written Sentences Found In The Wild (33 Tweets)

[holy-leapin-splits-batman]

[ranaeley]

Obligatory truck I don’t trust reblog

[thewrongshop]

[VD: a man behind the wheel of a car sings a country-style song, interspersed with various video clips of pickup trucks on highways with precarious cargo, including loose plant matter, dangling pipes, and a small carousel. Lyrics: "If you got a pickup filled with a pile of junk, and I can't tell if it's secure / if you got a ladder tied to a couple of chairs or a bunch of loose 2 by 4s / if you got a couch or some plants or some pipes or some canisters that look like they're about to combust / I won't be eatin' your dust / 'cause that's a truck I don't trust/ that's a truck I don't trust." Credited to @/tommcgovern27. End VD]

[ID: A series of TikTok comments. "what" writes, "very Phineas and Ferb coded," and Tom McGovern replies, "High praise, Dan Povenmire is the best!!!," and Katie writes, "One. Relatable. Two: I WILL be singing this every time I'm on the highway for the rest of forever thank you." End ID]