welcome?

icon credit to @pbeltarts

[fangshazzard]

I bet raising your arm and summoning a weapon for you to grasp feels good as fuck

[meanbossart]

The best dressed lesbians at the ball.

[varxne]

[absolutewifey]

Do You Wipe Your Ass Every Time You Poop

Yes. 100% of the time. Provided there is toilet paper available.

No. Not 100% of the time. If toilet paper is available I sometimes choose not to

Remaining time: 11 hours 29 minutes

I just learned something I find absolutely disgusting about my boyfriend and I am fucking nauseous about it but need to get him peer reviewed before I completely loose my mind because I am so afraid of over reacting.

[godpup]

HEY CAN EVERYONE TELL SHEILA THAT THIS IS NOT AN OVERREACTION AND THAT THIS IS INSANE AND YOU NEED TO LEAVE HIM YESTERDAY

[ivy-michaels]

GIRL, DUMP HIM

[loth-caatgirl]

GIRL KILL HIM

[iwilleatyourenglish]

girl do not be guilt tripped by a man mudbutting through god's green earth

[scorpio-system]

AAA video game publisher voice: "Look. The goose layed a golden egg, and that's nice! Everyone loved that egg. But keeping the golden goose means paying for bird feed and I don't want to, so I killed the goose."

[vanshira]

#‘that goose keeps laying golden eggs. that’s stagnation. I’m going to kill it and go look for a goose that lays diamond eggs’#‘that goose normally lays golden eggs but this time it laid a silver egg. I’m going to kill it because even though I can still make good#money with that it’s not as good as a golden egg’#‘that golden egg laying goose only lays an egg once a day instead of constantly shitting them out. I don’t care that golden eggs take time#if they’re not constant the goose is worthless to me’

@thebaldursmouthgazette y u leave all the good stuff in the tags

[mahitariadi]

I drew our favorite goth girl.

[boringkate]

When I was a kid watching tv was idiot coded and nerds read books, but now scrolling shortform videos is considered braindead behavior and watching tv means you're some kinda intellectual. You might think this shifting assessment of media's consumers might make readers into absolute super geniuses, but no. Only perverts read now.

[todaysbird]

fun fact about me: When I was 6 years old I sent so much hate mail to the president (the second Bush) that the mail carrier had to tell my mom I needed to stop before we got FBI’d

[todaysbird]

I was COMPLETELY unaware of the US political scene or why the adults in my life hated Bush, but I knew I hated him because he let people shoot wolves from helicopters and that’s mean and shitty

[todaysbird]

I also had a poor grasp on how stamps worked, so given that I wasn’t allowed to continually throw money away by putting stamps on my presidential hate mail, a lot of the times I just drew squares with little pictures inside on the corner.

[fantasticait]

Love, love, love reading more proof that everyone should encourage the children in their lives to write to elected officials--it teaches them about citizenship and can also be very funny.

When I taught second grade, one of the options for students who had finished their work was to write a letter to the president. I would send all of the letters in a big envelope at the end of every month.

Watching my students get more and more frustrated with him (and concerned about his wellbeing) was not the result I'd hoped for when I came up with the idea, but it was kind of hilarious.

See, Obama had a standard packet with information and activities about his dog he'd send in response to letters from very young citizens...and of course his office sent one back to our class every single time we sent mail.

So eventually all of the letters looked something like this:

Dear President Obama, I am writing about the environment. I am sad that the Great Barrier Reef is hurt. Also the Amazon Rainforest. Can you help? PLEASE DON'T WRITE BACK TO TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DOG AGAIN. WE ALREADY KNOW ALL ABOUT BO. WE COMPLETED THE MAZE AND COLORED HIM IN. It is good that you love your pet a lot. But try to remember the environment. It is also important.

[ishipallthings]

[depsidase]

[lmaonade]

[enki2]

[lyricwritesprose]

I gotta say, this is weirdly comforting.

Like, you bring an ancient Sumerian to my time, and he doesn't recognize anything, does he. My house is some weird thing with metal on the sides, my clothes are made from a cloth that he's never seen before, the road by my house is some freaky black substance, never mind fucking cars—and I am throwing a ball for an eager little sausage animal with no more legs than a ferret (her breed is Weird Dachshund Mix From Humane Society Whose Breed Guess Was Hilariously Wrong)—

And then she galumphs back with the ball all like, "Yaaay, rassle me for it!!!!" and I am like, please just drop your drool-covered ball so I can chuck it again, and she goes, "Noooo, rassle first!!!!!" and the ancient Sumerian is like—

Oh.

A dog.

And suddenly we aren't so different after all.

[shoku-and-awe]

All the wind on my balcony may be bad for my laundry and for my plants, but it’s okay because it’s GREAT for my weird tiny son

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

After school care pulled me aside about my child dropping an f-bomb “without remorse” and I put on my concerned face and nodded a bunch.

Apparently he was building something with a younger kid “who really looks up to him and is just starting to make friends” and said “Hey, you’re really fucking good at this.” which is, in my estimation, really a parenting victory.

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

I absolutely failed at doing this:

[jelloapocalypse]

Someone asked me a while ago if I still had a photo of the worst sink I had ever seen while apartment hunting in Los Angeles. I assumed I deleted it so I didn't answer the ask and now it's gone, but as it turns out, yes, I do still have a photo of it.

[bagelbarr0n]

Really funny one two punch on my dash this morning

[milf--adjacent]

Let the historical record show that Mr. Beast was entirely ignorable if you were just like doing literally anything else. I've been on youtube as long as it's been around and I've never been recommended a video by him. I see him in passing as a meme. I thought he was a made up joke, a caricature of bad youtuber content miners until someone I trust confirmed his existence to me in late 2025.

[the-quasar-hero]

More game devs need to understand the following concepts:

There is a finite amount of memory on any given device.

No matter how good your game is, players will want memory for other things on their devices.

Not everyone has a stable internet connection so making single player games needing an internet connection is not good.

[definitely-zen-browser]

4. The price of memory has more than quadrupled in the past six months

[eikonoklasms]

i cant stop thinking about this post so bad. cat named daniel