FORTRESS MAXIMUS HAS CUM HIMSELF!

Hello! I'm Zhant (That isn't my real name, it's simply what I tend to go by online). I am a fan of many different things, but right now it's Transformers: The Headmasters dub time, baby. That's it. Enjoy! Or don't, you have free will.

[rockfact]

is he okay

[syphabelnyades]

no he is not.

[andhaveapleasanttomorrow]

having a pet is insane... there is a guy on my floor

[kittenchomp]

hears someone pounding at my door immediately before receiving this message

[westmeath]

[columboverse]

“I’ll tell ya somethin’ – there are so many clues here, I just don’t know where to start!”

[columboverse]

this is the best addition to this post

[mynameismad]

I like drawing chickens almost as much as I like drawing wizards so OF COURSE you know where I’m going with this…

[besnouted]

i give momo a pizza crust and instead of eating it like a normal animal she carries it around like a toy

[besnouted]

[prinxcesspeach]

{ ♡ } -: ✧ :-゜・．

[probuccalfat1]

two men could literally fuck in a marvel movie and it still wouldn’t be gay rep to me. sorry

[probuccalfat1]

i wish you could accept or deny tags on your posts because this is the dumbest shit i’ve ever read in my life. grabbing somebody’s shoulder is not having intercourse, marvel isn’t trying to make you forget anything because it’s so poorly written that they don’t even know what’s happening. also, that is incest. get better taste.

[happycranberry-deactivated20131]

the ham is melting, the turkey is suspended in midair, the salami is hatching from its own egg. why did we even come to the salvador deli

[dimetrodone]

[his-shining-tears]

What are thoooooseee????

[beetlejuicesgraveyardrevue]

tropicbirds!! these little stinkers grow up to be very fancy

[huffylemon]

I can’t handle this 🥺

[distinguishedbaloney]

[hungwy]

Worst part of living with animals is the night time sloppy licking cleaning noises I'm sorry but I cannot sleep . Please fhcking stop please please olease

[icariancarrrion]

[mccek]

🐱La piccola grande famiglia dei British #11 (2)🧸

[whitepeopletwitter]

[lonesplashy]

Honestly why would you hide this in the notes

[dont-drink-paint]

My father would, at one point, buy knives from a man with a prosthetic leg, made out of wood. Might seem strange to buy knives from a knife salesman instead of a store, but this was company level and they needed a supplier of scalpels or something. Anyway, this guy would bring out a knife, show it, talk about it and then stab the knife into his thigh while continuing to hold a normal conversation. Only mentioning that he had a wooden leg once the customer jumped out of the chair in shock.

[sighinastorm]

Did he have wooden pants?

[depsidase]

[flagellant]

[crtter]

i know you won't translate "sense during speech" to norwegian........