[inaccuratemdzs]

Lan Wangji: Wei Ying is beautiful, kind, clever... I love my Wei Ying

Wei Wuxian: aww

Wei Wuxian, inside: You know he doesn't really love you, right?

Wei Wuxian: Are you calling Lan Zhan a liar?

[inaccuratemdzs]

Wen Qing: Help me avenge my brother

Jiang Cheng: You have my sword

Lan Wangji: And my Guqin

Wei Wuxian: And your brother!

[inaccuratemdzs]

Wei WuXian: You know, there's something weird going on with your face.

Lan Zhan: What?

Wei WuXian: You’re smiling. I didn’t know you could do that.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Mo XuanYu: Cultivational world, how do I get revenge on those who have forsaken me?“

The Cultivational world: The best revenge is letting go and living well

Mo XuanYu: ….YiLing Patriarch, how do I–

[inaccuratemdzs]

Wei WuXian: Sometimes, I don’t realize an event was traumatic until I tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weird.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Jin Guangyao: So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures is on the roof.

Nie Huaisang: They're waiting for you to die.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Nie Huaisang: When I said bring me something back from the beach, I meant like...a shell.

Jiang Cheng, struggling to hold a seagull: Well, you didn't fucking say that.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Wei WuXian: What are you doing?

Jiang Cheng: Stargazing.

Wei WuXian: You're just looking up at pictures of yourself taped to the ceiling.

Jiang Cheng: The stars are beautiful tonight.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Jin GuangYao: Life isn't always easy. You have to claw through the misery and self-loathing until-

Jin Ling: Until you get to a place in life where you're content?

Jin GuangYao: No, until you die.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Xue Yang: This is Daozhang. He's not my assistant, he's, er, some other word.

Xiao Xingchen: I'm his carer.

Xue Yang: Yeah, my carer! He cares so I don't have to.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Jiang Cheng, to Wei WuXian: Of course I touch myself when I think of you.

Jiang Cheng: It’s called a facepalm.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Nie Mingjue: Huaisang, stop lurking!

Nie Huaisang: I'm not lurking, I'm standing quietly in the shadows.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Song Lan: Were you dropped on your head as a child?

Xue Yang: Bold of you to assume I was held.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Jiang Cheng, coming up behind Wei WuXian and covering his eyes: Guess who? He’s sweet, handsome, and he’s gonna get really mad if you get it wrong.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Lan XiChen: I think–I think I have a crush on A-Yao…

Nie Mingjue: Congratulations! You’re officially the last person to know.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Wei WuXian: Wait, I have to tell you something!

Wei WuXian:

Wei WuXian: I like you.

Lan Zhan: Well I would hope so, we’re getting married right now.

[inaccuratemdzs]

Nie Huaisang: When I say “I understand,” it doesn’t mean I understand. It doesn’t mean I agree. It doesn’t even mean I’m listening.