Untitled

[incorrecttbv]

“It costs $400 to go see a therapist, but it costs $0 to tell myself it be like that sometimes.”

— Dina, probably

[incorrect-musicals]

Jenna: People treat me like a god.

Michael: What, how?

Jenna: They ignore my existence unless they need something from me.

[incorrect-musicals]

Emma, to an irate customer: Sir this is an Arby’s.

[incorrect-musicals]

Heidi: Evan, where do you think you’re going?

Connor: Play dumb.

Evan: Who’s Evan?

Connor: Not that dumb!

[incorrect-musicals]

Mimi: u, and dare I say, wu.

[incorrect-musicals]

Jeremy: I am, unfortunately, all panic and no disco.

[incorrecttgwdlmquotes]

Bill: You either do your work or you end up at mcdonald's

Alice: We're going to mcdonald's if I don't do my work?

Bill: No--

[incorrect-musicals]

Chloe: As a lesbian-

Her parents look at her.

Chloe: ... supporter

[incorrect-musicals]

Paul: Two years ago today I married my best friend.

Paul: Emma’s still mad about it but me and Bill were drunk and thought it was funny.

[incorrect-musicals]

Connor, inevitably: Listen to MCR... wear black... punch a transphobe... yeehaw.

[incorrect-musicals]

Justin: Naomi! How do you ask how a glass of water is doing?

Naomi: A glass of water is an inanimate object and is incapable of having a thought process or understanding languages.

Justin, snickering: ‘Water’ you doing?

[incorrect-musicals]

You always believe in other people, but that’s easy. Sooner or later, you gotta believe in yourself, too, because that’s what growing up is. It’s becoming who you want to be. You have to try!

Mr. Heere, at some point

[incorrect-musicals]

Heidi: This is a disaster! The printer messed up the invitation! It’s supposed to say “Evan’s birthday”!

Jared: Well, what does it say instead?

Heidi: “Evan’s bi”

Jared: That could still work.

[incorrect-rent]

Mimi: how do I look

Roger: with your eyes??

[incorrect-musicals]

Rich: *writing angrily* Love is dead and never existed. All you did was betray me as I lay sick and festering. You are the definition of dread.

Jake: Dude, are you okay?

Rich: ...Brooke stole my fucking garlic bread.

[incorrect-musicals]

Mimi: Happy Christmas!

Benny: Halloween was THREE DAYS AGO.

[incorrect-musicals]

Jared: And remember, you’re not allowed to fall in love with me.

Evan: Won’t be a problem.

2 days later

Evan: There’s a problem.