Incorrect Wandavision Quotes

There are no basically no spoilers except for characters that appear; I've tagged anything that could possibly be a spoiler as such.

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Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well-rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?

Wanda Maximoff

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Agatha: Will you be supervillain lesbian lovers with me for Halloween?

Wanda:

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Wanda: I wish I could block people in real life.

Monica: Restraining order.

Agatha: Murder.

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Agnes: Well, if ignorance is bliss, you must be one happy fucking idiot.

Pietro: I am, thank you.

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Monica: [to Wanda] You've got more issues than National Geographic

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Darcy: [about why she didn't kiss Monica] She didn't even give me the signal!

Woo: What, is she gonna... Is she gonna bat her eyes at you in Morse code?

Woo: [bats eyes] Darcy... kiss me. No! You just kiss her!

Darcy: Not if you don't get the signal!

Woo: [spontaneously kisses Vision] Did Vision give me the signal?

Vision: No!

Vision: [to Wanda] I didn't, I swear!

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Vision: Perhaps there's more to Pietro than meets the eye.

Wanda: No, there's less.

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Darcy: I wish I could say I outdid myself, but I'm always this good. So I simply did myself.

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Wanda: I went through an entire character arc during quarantine.

Wanda: I became more evil if you're curious.

Vision: We're still in quarantine, don't worry, there's time for a redemption arc still!

Wanda: I'm going to get worse on purpose.

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Pietro: I have an idea.

Wanda: [looks at him suspiciously] A good one?

Pietro: Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

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Monica: Your uncontrolled magic is triggered by anger and fear.

Wanda: Those are like the baseline of any woman just existing.

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Billy: [in a text to Wanda] Tommy and I'll be home in five minutes.

Billy: If not, read this again.

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Monica: Mansplaining is-

Hayward: Mansplaining is when a man explains something to a woman that she already knows but he acts like he's teaching her. Does that make sense to you?

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Wanda: Would you call me selfish?

Agnes: Not to your face.

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Darcy: This is the maintenance closet, Jimmy.

Darcy: This is the most cliché hiding place you could have chosen. This is the stupidest hiding place.

Woo: I'm sorry, I didn't take us to the Bahamas of hiding places!

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Dottie: The only time you seem honest is when you're insulting someone!

Agnes: The only honest things I can say to you are insults!

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Woo: So I was wondering if you could help me out.

Darcy: Say no more. Here's bunch of explosives

Woo: Nope, different thing.