not actually all that crazier than what was actually said bc we'

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Alden: Are you, by any chance, seeing someone?

John: No, why?

Alden: Well, I just think you’d benefit from seeing a therapist. 

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Chad: Hey! You guys missed it, I just did the worm!

Ruby: You can do the worm?

Chad: Yea! *lifts his arms and wiggles them*

Ruby: Chad, I don’t know if that’s-

Maven *quietly*: Just let him have this.

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Corwin: Everyone accuses me of having a favorite friend, and that’s not true.

Corwin: I like all the Pacifics and non-Pacifics equally.

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the necromancer looking at the silverwood institute: it’s free real estate

incredible. there is nothing i can add to this.

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Elena: Do you like Linus?

Piper: Sure, who doesn’t?

Elena: Over half of the people who meet him.

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Lina: See? This is my ‘I don’t care’ face.

Piper: That’s your normal face.

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Fitzy: Sometimes, when we disagree, you are so passionate, I feel like I’m arguing with the sun.

Kiernan: WHAT?! That is totally crazy, I am SUPER CHILL ALL THE TIME!!!

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[at a battle]

Money: Is anyone else scared?

Kiernan: Not really. I’ve already lived longer than I expected.

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John: Should I take my shirt off?

Kive: No  one asked you to take your shirt off. Stop volunteering to take your shirt off.

John: Can’t hear you. Shirt’s over my ears.

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Nina: Does seeing us all fail make you feel better about your sad, pathetic life?

Lina: It does 100%.

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Tavariel: Roses are red, violets are blue…sunflowers are yellow…tulips come in all kinds of colors…daffodils are also yellow.

Arcanum: Was that supposed to be a poem?

Tavariel: No, I just like flowers.

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Nina: This was the worst day ever!

Piper: Was it because you almost died?

Nina: No, it’s because it’s a little humid- YES IT’S BECAUSE I ALMOST DIED!

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Ruby: I will not let a technicality stop me.

Fallasalde: A technicality like the rules?

Ruby: Yeah. I hate those things.

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Maven: When crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, it’s ‘intelligent’ and ‘really cool’ but when I do it I’m ‘petty’ and ‘need to move on’.

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Arcanum: If we need more evidence, we will get more evidence!

Fallasalde: Yeah, because that’s a really good way to solve crime isn’t it? Decide who’s guilty and then find out some evidence. I tell you what, why don’t we just lock him in a dark room and torture him until he confesses? That might be quicker!

Fallasalde, to Ruby:...why...why are you writing that down?

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Lina: As my grandma always said, it’s only a walk of shame if you’re capable of feeling shame.

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Kevin: What you need is faith!

Lina: And what you need is a psychiatrist who enjoys a challenge.