Incorrect Samurai Warriors Quotes

Welcome, this a wonderful blog of (in)correct Samurai Warriors quotes. Submissions for quotes are open anytime.

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Koshosho, handing out margaritas, to Gracia: You drink, right kid?

Gracia: Sure!

Mitsuhide, taking the drink out of Gracia’s hands: I don’t think so.

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Ujiyasu: So help me God, Kotaro, sometimes I think I’ve failed as a father.

Kotaro: Sometimes?

Ujiyasu: Oh, shut up!

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Hanzo: I stole nothing.

Kunoichi: I broke nothing.

Kotaro: I stabbed nothing.

Nene:

Kunoichi: Aren’t you proud of us?

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Whenever people look at Aya and find out that she's my older sister, I feel like they look back at me and think, "God, what happened to Kenshin? Did he witness a murder?"

Kenshin

[lupotterdraws]

@incorrectsamuraiwarriorsquotes is a gift

(Original post can be found here)

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Mitsuhide: Your retainer is gnc af

Nobunaga: You are insane.

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WAKE THE FUCK UP Y’ALL

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Nō: God, we're terrible. I'm so proud of us.

Nobunaga: I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.

[jelllybears-remade-blog]

im laughing

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No: If I die, my funeral’s going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited.

Okuni: If?

Ranmaru: Great, the only party I've ever been invited to and she might not even die.

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[investigating a haunted house]

No: You don’t feel the energy here?

Okuni, with her phone out: Oh shit, what’s up, I’m taking a selfie with some demons!

No: *slides into frame with a peace sign*

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Ranmaru: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

Hideyoshi: What if it bites me and it dies?

Ranmaru: That means you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, learn to listen.

Masamune: What if it bites itself and I die?

Okuni: It’s voodoo.

Hideyoshi: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Ranmaru: That’s correlation, not causation.

Nobunaga: What if we bite each other and neither of us die?

No: That’s kinky.

Ranmaru: Oh my god.

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Shingen: Do you think I could fit twenty marshmallows in my mouth?

Ujiyasu: You're a hazard to yourself, Shingen.

Kenshin: And a coward. Do thirty.

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Mitsunari: Alright, I'm going to be frank,

Sakon: Okay, can I still be Sakon?

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Mitsuhide: Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight, Lady No? Have you ever seen the face of death crawling through your bed at night?

No: Well, yes, although he’s a Gengar, and Okuni and I like to call him Kitty.

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Kenshin: Aya, can you do something for me?

Aya: I would literally cover up a murder for you, plant my DNA at the crime scene, and take the blame for the crime.

Kenshin: Great. Can you do the dishes for me?

Aya: No.

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Kojuro: Why would you give Masamune a knife?

Magoichi: He felt unsafe.

Kojuro: Well, now I feel unsafe!

Magoichi: I’m sorry, uh... do you want a knife?