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if i look back, i am lost
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@intezaarlily
every good thing has the inherent sadness about it for when it passes and it will have to pass. everything will have to pass. its all onboarding trains and then watching them go by from train stations and i hope the next thing i love kills me
convoluted au where stratt has the coma resistance genes, and then pre-launch yáo really puts his foot down about not going if he doesn't have confirmation that grace is willing, and then his backup says the same thing, so she decides "fuck it, we'll just have to get this done before the amnesia wears off, not like I was ever going to live out a good life on earth" and subs herself in as mission commander. uh oh! they wake up and ilyukhina has still died en route, that's their only qualified astronaut gone. and that's also the only corroborating witness for literally any of grace's memories. upside, she can tell him he came here toooootally voluntarily and no one's around to point out that certainly wasn't the case three days before launch. downside, oh fuck, with this down to a two-hander it'll take longer and if he remembers and realizes she's been actively lying then Oh No. upside, hey there's a friendly alien to help, maybe that will speed things up and let them get to their suicide appointment on time. also it's cool or whatever that they're working with an alien. he's actually very competent and pleasant to be around and he cares enough about their wellbeing that he's willing to just Give Them enough fuel to go back home, and grace is crying from relief, and stratt has never even considered the idea that a future existed where someone was ever happy to see her again, she'd just written that off as a possibility, but now maybe they can save the world and get home and be happy and be hailed as heroes, and maybe their lives can have value and potential and joy beyond this one act of service for humanity, and--
the amnesia wears off.
she can tell the minute he gets his last few memories back, not because he confronts her or says anything, but because his body language starts very visibly broadcasting that he's afraid of her. and then rocky starts acting real shifty, too. she assumes they're planning to kill her so grace can go back on his own as the only actual hero. grace assumes that her plan is to kill him because she sees him as disposable. oh yes oh yes oh yes they both oh yes they both oh yes they both reached for--
Surely Grace inadvertently causes a craft revolution on Erid when it's realized that he's going to need new clothes sooner or later. He gets to explain different colors to Eridians and they recreate his fox cardigan, but more cozy and with stone inlays so he makes noise when he walks. He's also regained some weight since getting to Erid but they want to make sure he's nice and cushioned and warm, so they create matching pants, too, that mimic the coloring on a fox's legs. They have many thrums about this and different crafting groups fight for which articles of clothing they get to make Savior Grace. They create different synthetic fibers to mimic fur and wool and everything :)
I also added the base illustration that I drew over, like how it is with paper dolls lol
SUSAN & ASLAN: GOD WAS SILENT
The Bible, Mark 16:19, Catholic Public Domain Version / The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe (2005) / Pieter de Grebber, God Inviting Christ to Sit on the Throne at His Right Hand / Biblehub, Mark 16:19 / C.S. Lewis, The Last Battle (1956) / Emily Rose Cole, Love & a Loaded Gun / Eduard Kasparides, The Penitent Mary Magdalene / Anne Sexton, The Civil War / Catherynne M. Valente, Deathless / Prince Caspian (2008) / The Tale of Princess Kaguya (2013) / Supernatural, The Man Who Would Be King / Hilary Mantel, The Mirror and the Light / Hozier, It Will Come Back / Ada Limon, The Echo Sounder / Bleachers, Merry Christmas, Please Don't Call / Shakespeare, Romeo & Juliet / Stephen Adly Guirgis, The Last Days of Judas Iscariot / Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita
louis smiling and confirming to regina that hes gay is so funny to me.... no no i didnt want SEX oh god, you mustve thought i was so creepy haha. Noooo omg i want you to act like my dead vampire daughter who was also a stand in for my humam sister who died believing me to be a monster. which i am.
key to Eva Stratt isn't "she does whatever she wants." She does whatever she thinks is necessary. Her own wants are so low on her priority list they might as well not exist. She'll do anything, Anything, to get the job done. Including pretending that her own feelings are completely insignificant for so long, she'll be angry at one of her only friends for refusing to die. "I've destroyed myself to make this happen - why can't you grant me the same sacrifice? Can't you see this betrayal goes both ways?" movie!Stratt is of course, softer and more stoic about it. Which I think makes sense: she understands movie!Grace needs (the illusion of) compassion to convince him to agree. She'll put aside her anger to say what she thinks is the right thing. Afterall, isn't she an expert in putting aside her own feelings to get the job done?
Congratulations! You made the right choice
you believe me like a god, i’ll betray you like a man.
and yes, this is inspired by the painting: Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan
I'm obsessed with this little moment where Stratt is like reaching out to say Hi to Grace but instead of patting his shoulder or something she pats his tiny little chair. and filmed from behind a barrier
– Directors' Commentary, Project Hail Mary (edited slightly)
"How do you say goodbye back home?" "We don't. We do this."
based on "dog years" by @birdadjacent
what do you think of the concept of WAGs?
if you give a man the power to feed you you give a man the power to starve you.
so you’re on all the bank accounts. do you have an account of just your own that he can’t access? because he has one. do you have a way to get money into that account uncontested? because he does. do you have a credit card in only your name? he has one. do you alone qualify for a mortgage or car loan? he does. do you have employment history? he does.
have you considered that if he hurts you and you file a report or get medical attention, that will damage his career as a public figure, and his career is your only income? have you considered that unless you are 100% certain you want to divorce, it’s in your best interest to keep everything as quiet as you possibly can? have you considered that your husband plays a sport with high rates of CTE and drug and alcohol abuse which all correlate to rage and loss of impulse control? have you considered that at any time he can get traded and you’ll be off to utah in 24 hours? have you considered that your support system is a group of women in the same place as you who consider this all normal and even enviable? are you a good wife? are you a caring mother? are you a hot girlfriend? have you learned to find value in your commodification? if you broke up with your boyfriend and cut your hair and changed your name would your friends still be your friends? would your community still be your community? it all seems exciting and romantic and like a perfect story when you are 21 and he proposes on the beach. it seems like the way you want your life to go. now you’re 31 with 5 kids and no work history in a place you didn’t grow up surrounded only by women in your same situation.
and maybe nothing bad happens! maybe he loves you and treats you well. maybe he is kind and caring and a good partner and a good father and a good husband. maybe you are respected and valued.
isn’t that benevolent of him?
so many great things about the “i’d let him do open heart surgery on me if he wanted” quote, but i love that it’s another case of grace displacing his wants onto the other person. so he doesn’t have to be rejected. does stratt want me to work on the project? do my friends want me at the party? does the scientific community want me at the conference? does rocky want to do surgery on me? mf do YOU want these things?? can you take ownership of your own desires…
guys my students would be so bummed if you sent me to die. have we thought about how they feel.
went through the effort of making this gif just to remind everyone of rocky scooting closer to grace on the beach
[ID: A gif from Project Hail Mary of Grace and Rocky sitting together on the biodome's shoreline. Rocky folds his limbs in to "sit" beside Grace, and after a few moments readjusts to tuck himself closer to Grace's side. End ID]
✨ Stargazing aboard the Hail Mary ✨
Rotating them around my head like a civil war butter churning centrifuge, and I have a cold so I don’t know if this makes sense or not - please be nice! 💜
