the notion of saving lives at all costs prevents suicidal people from speaking about their experiences in a candid way, knowing they will be decentered (e.g. “your family/friends will be devastated if you die”), subject to moral arguments (e.g. “suicide is a selfish act”), referred to someone else, often someone who has a hefty paywall behind their listening ear (e.g. “are you seeing a therapist about this?”), or incarcerated against their will. because of this, voices of suicidal people are left out from conversations about suicide, even paradoxically in campaigns encouraging suicidal people to reach out for support.
in order to break the stigma around suicidality, we have to break away from the prevention-no-matter-what script and honor suicidal people’s autonomy, allowing them to speak freely about their lived experience even in the face of personal discomfort for nonsuicidal people. in our current society, nonsuicidal people wield power/privilege over suicidal people. if your immediate reaction to hearing about a marginalized person’s pain is to shut them down in some way, you need to evaluate why you are centering your own comfort above another person who is confiding in you.
