“Welcome to Night Vale” twitter sentence meme
❝ The average person is swallowed by eight spiders each year while sleeping. ❞
❝ Dance like the government is watching. ❞
❝ Good artists borrow. Great artists commit murder. ❞
❝ We hold these truths to be self evident, even though, historically and in practice, none of them have seemed to be. ❞
❝ Stars! They’re just like us… Fixed points of light against the void, arranged in contrived constellations of long-dead gods! ❞
❝ What’s the deal with airplane food? What’s the deal with human attachments in a mortal world? What’s the deal with those two things? ❞
❝ See? You never needed that wand or that cape. The power to feel unfocused shame and anxiety was within you this whole time. ❞
❝ On a long enough timeline, the unlikely event of an emergency is not only likely, but certain. The good news is that your timeline isn’t long. ❞
❝ Wanna feel old? Make comparative judgments based on how long you’ve been alive versus how long younger people have been alive. Wild. ❞
❝ You can tell me all your secrets. I mean, you absolutely shouldn’t. I’ll use them against you. But you technically can. ❞
❝ Every cloud has a silver, neurochemical lining. ❞
❝ Good night. Sleep tight. Don’t let the bed bugs bite. Don’t let the bed birds peck your eyes. Don’t let the bed worms get into your mouth. ❞
❝ Ask your doctor if the moon belongs to you. ❞
❝ Today’s forecast is sunny with a chance of the false vacuum of the universe collapsing, instantly destroying everything that is. ❞
❝ I’m sure everything will be fine. I’m sure of lots of things that are wrong. I’m highly fallible. ❞
❝ Who’s a good boy? How can we be certain? Is a ‘good boy’ measured in action or intent? You are subjectively a good boy! Oh yes you are! ❞
❝ Good pairings for this wine include pasta, stone fruits, conversation with someone you distrust, and a sudden loss of cabin pressure. ❞
❝ If you’re happy and you know it, then the chemtrails are finally working. ❞
❝ Not really killing time so much as euthanizing it. ❞
❝ Have fun tonight pretending to be something or somebody you aren’t. In fact, have fun doing this every night of the year. ❞
❝ Have you done your grocery shopping yet? Remember, it’ll be hard to find ingredients like ‘wet stones’ and ‘a quiet, shuddering man’ tomorrow. ❞
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