"It is a classic case of women being required to simulate emotions in order to please, then being punished for their fakery."
Unkind, Victoria Smith, pages 115-116.
"Women are expected to perform wanting it in relation to all patriarchal impositions, as women coerced into being raped for pay are expected to perform wanting it. But this performance wins us no real prize: ‘whore’ is meant to punish women for their compliance in their performance of wanting it. ‘Worse than a whore’—bitch, you could say more succinctly—is meant to punish women for refusing to perform wanting it. The ‘choice’ between whore or bitch, wanting it or not wanting it, is not a real choice.
It is the ritualistic bodily intrusions that reinforce women’s social inferiority in the eyes of men and each other. These intrusions constitute a violent process of ideological indoctrination into the myth of female worthlessness. It can take myriad forms—bodily intrusion in the form of bearing unwanted children for your husband, drugging yourself into a stupor to withstand constant dehumanization, being drugged into unconscious stillness by an expert for the benefit of a doctor who wants to surgically rearrange your features, a male ‘friend’ forcing himself on you, another woman hurting you to make you look more attractive to men, or another woman beating you because that’s the only way either of you can experience sexual arousal anymore. It is the means by which we are convinced to want it, an endless cycle of destroying female power-from-within."
Detransition, Max Robinson
"Through the porn script, female degradation is granted a context in which it is not just permissible, but in which it must be defended against 'conservative' forces. The insufficiently degraded woman - the woman who sees herself as more than an object - becomes aberrant, or even (if one empties the term 'fascist' of all meaning) fascist-adjacent. This is a perspective that extends beyond sexual relations per se and into political interactions, because it informs men's expectations of where women should be positioned in relation to them......Normative beliefs about women have always been sexualised to suggest we 'love it really' whether 'it' happens to be blowjobs, housework, dependency, pain, or having the life choked out of us."
Unkind, Victoria Smith, pages 120-121
"I knew that the labelling of women in unhealthy relationships as masochistic—that is, seeking and enjoying suffering—has long been standard practice in my profession and in our culture. This is a convenient but highly dangerous way of attempting to explain why so many women fall into self-denying, submissive behavior with men. In reality, women learn these behaviors early, and are consistently rewarded and praised for them. The paradox here is that the behaviors that make a woman vulnerable to mistreatment are the very ones she has been taught are feminine and lovable. The concept of masochism is particularly dangerous because it serves to justify aggression against women—it confirms that “that’s what women really want.”"
Men Who Hate Women & The Women Who Love Them, Dr Susan Forward.
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